Should a women lie about her physical past with other Men?

It's good that you can analyze yourself and admit your shortfalls, and better yet when you can apologize. Not many have the ability to admit when they make a mistake and apologize.

 

While its nice that you have decided to be upfront about ur past..a good chunk of that credit also goes to ur DH...in that he has let u decide/dictate what and how much u want to tell him. Not all spouses are that way.
They will pester endlessly for details and the ensuing discussions /fights may not be worth it at all.
So for some...partial truth may not be an option.
Either be prepared to bare it all or just shut up ...close that chapter of ur life and move on.

 

@Nalini and @Jag... I agree that my husband handled my past pretty well. He is an easy going person by nature. That's exactly the reason I told him my past before marriage,....because I wanted some-one who can accept me with the amount of aggression and straightforwardness that lies in my personality. I thought that a guy needs to know what he's getting into )

But yeah, I agree that one should tell/reveal to the extent that's permitted by his/her personality and circumstances. And I also think talking about a past affair before is not a moral obligation. I did, because I wanted to make sure that the one I am getting married is not too hard to deal with, given the way I myself am

 

Excellent answer. Thats right. She should never be held responsible. In fact the man has to be held responsible. Our legal system follows it to the T- it doesnt hold her responsible for adultery even after marriage leave alone premarital sex and hiding it.

Besides, if she hides her past- it does a good thing - spare him the confusion.
Never place on a moral high ground- after all marriage is between 2 equals - what if she dint bring her virginity into the marriage, she brought better- experience.
Its not Kanyadan, its Kanhaiahdaan, the pot of Lord Krishna.
Learn to look at the positive side.

 

wuts abt this thing abt man/woman being responsible?
abt bringing virginity into marriage.... marriage is a commitment b/w/n 2 humans to be loyal to each other. if they're true and nice to each other... whats the point treating pre-marital virginity as some kinda insurance premium against every possible damage to marriages. do virgin men and women have extra limbs to do more work in marriages...or virgin wives come with some kinda guarantee/warranty against no defects?

btw...I have overlooked my husband's past too...a past affair that had even continued till initial period of our marriage too! i forgave it...because the trust that built over-time between us was more important than crying over what didn't exist and wht we believe will never exist in our lovable married lives. We both r more than glad that on our present we've chosen to not give a damn to what went in our past....because what we have now is much more beautiful and valuable than certificates of each others pre-marital virginity!!

 

Dear Members,

All the posts from last night have been deleted. We do not need any unsavoury one on ones or personal attacks here. This is neither a court of law with us sitting in judgement of whether other people are being honest, dishonest or selectively honest/dishonest or to question people's integrity, value systems, bandy their pasts nor was this the primary intention of this thread. Since this post has gone completely off track it is now being closed.