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Room Parent..scary..

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous in Parenting' started by anika987, Sep 4, 2019.

  1. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    Guys please don’t judge me..

    Contrary to what u know me on IL,I actually suffer from social anxiety.IL is my parallel world where I am extremely expressive.In real world,I smile and talk to people but inside am always wailing with anxiety..

    My kid started first grade and soon they will ask people to be room parents.Almost all the moms are working and since am a homemaker will I be stressed to become a room parent?

    I don’t want too much socializing with other parents and it’s not that I can’t do it or I hate them.Its just that I feel anxiety and right now having some mild Medication.

    Once in a while meeting is
    Okay but regular meetings will take my anxiety to a different level..

    Kindly clarify how often you get to meet other parents in school and will it be an a problem if I don’t sign to Be a room parent coz am a homemaker
     
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  2. Thoughtful

    Thoughtful Gold IL'ite

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    First of all, stop being anxious with - will they ask me to do this or do that because I am a home maker.

    Don't tell anyone you are home maker. You might be a writer or a social activist or a care taker or have your own business ( import export ). Its no one's business. You are not available as you are busy.

    Also, skip the room parent. People are the most judgmental when it comes to anything with their kids. You dont need this. IMO

    Also, my humble request, stop saying, don't judge me. It like Ray Barone says "don't think of zebras" and then ask "What did you think when said, don't think of zebras"? Yes, people will think of zebras.
     
  3. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    Thanks..also what about the other question..how often we generally get to meet other parents?
     
  4. SpringB

    SpringB Platinum IL'ite

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    No you don’t have to be a room parent. No one will force you.

    Room parents help organize any special days in class like halloween for example. Room parent might have to ask parents to volunteer for crafts snacks etc. room parent will be a point of contact to coordinate class room events.

    If you are not available to do that no one will think anything or your childs performance will not be evaluated based on that. Chillax
     
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  5. SpringB

    SpringB Platinum IL'ite

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    During pick up drop off or during class room activities if u volunteer or any sports field day events or during conferences
     
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  6. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    How often are the classes room activities happening?
     
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  7. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    Thanks so much...

    For me it’s just that most parents r working and hence I thought I will be judged why am not being a room parent despite being home
     
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  8. SpringB

    SpringB Platinum IL'ite

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    Major celebrations halloween thx giving xmas valentine day end of year celebration etc. could be more can be less
     
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  9. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    If anyone here judges you (or thinks of zebras), tell me, I will give them a scolding that they will not forget till the end of the school year.

    You worry a little more than others but rest assured all parents go through this in some form or the other. Part of it is also due to not being familiar with the elementary school system before our first kid starts school. Reading your posts, I am recalling how I used to worry too, and how all those worries were needless. I remember worrying whether wearing a kurti on jeans to back-to-school night would look too homely. I took notes during the presentation while the more tech-savvy parents took pictures of the important slides with smartphones. At the end the teacher said she would be uploading the presentation to the class webpage. :lol: All notes/pictures were useless.

    In fact, I am benefiting from your questions. I tell myself my current worries are like the worries I had in K-3 school years. But myself is not listening to me. :laughing:

    If you don't sign up to be room parent they will make you stand outside the classroom unless you can provide proof that you are actively job-hunting. : )

    Sorry, j/k. With your questions, you can be just so tempting to mess with. : )

    Seriously, if you are living in a good school district with educated and involved parents, there will actually be competition for the room-parent job. Teacher might even have 2 parents share the job.

    Anika, it is ok to worry, and deal with the worrying as best as you can. But take care to not let it impact your child. Children react to school, teachers and incidents in the classroom/playground based on how their parents talk about school. If she overhears you talking with your husband or a friend about your worries, might have an impact that is noticeable right away.

    Other than drop off and pick up, you meet other parents at times like chaperoning field trips, events like Halloween celebration, winter song/fest, spring open house .. about 4-5 events in a year. You can interact with them as little or as much as you feel like.

    Only trying to help. My responses can be like chapter books. Take what helps and leave the rest.
     
    Last edited: Sep 5, 2019
  10. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    Actually I enjoyed reading your reply:)put me a bit in ease..

    Yeah Am a very mellow type and yes have some social anxiety issues due to my bullied past..

    For me..my concern is if I will be a good
    Parent who does right for my child..

    If not being a room parent or
    In PTA may impact them..

    I didn’t put her in kumon or many extra curricular activities like other parents and I also Heard people talk about gifted programs this and that...

    No idea how things will go..it’s intimidating to see my kids study in a different country with no Emotional Support here for me.I wish I raise her good.
     

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