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Retirement

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by HariLakhera, Sep 1, 2018.

  1. HariLakhera

    HariLakhera Platinum IL'ite

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    May be what's left for us,
    Is some tree on the hillside,
    We can look at day after day,
    And the perverse affection of a habit,
    That liked us so much it never let go.
    Anon
    I remember the farewell party hosted by my colleagues at the time of my retirement. My association with them was for only five years but it looked like I knew them for years. Similar was the experience when I was given a party on my transfer.
    But retirement was different. In one day you become a past. The notion that nothing moves without you, particularly when you were the head occupying the corner cabin, takes a solid beating. YOU ARE NOT NEEDED. Your replacement can do as good or even better. This day was expected, which all others were seeing and waiting for.
    And then there comes a feeling, how vague and false was your ego and how insignificant you are in the scheme of things.
    But as the poet said, there still is that tree on the hillside which, by sheer habit , you keep looking at. Habit like us as much as we like it. Weakness of each other. May be for some days you will wake up at the same time to go work and then reminded of the reality. May be you would like to dress up in your usual suit and tie and find that there is no where to go. May be for some days you will expect your ex colleagues calling you for help and suggestions, that may not come at all. May be you will actually visit your office to see for yourself if all will going smoothly and find to your dismay that not only all is well but they have even forgotten you and have little or no time for sharing a cup of tea.
    Well, I had the good luck of being hired again as a consultant but in few months I realised that they are not very much liking poking my nose in their working.
    It took me no time to understand that since now they are the players and responsible for results, they will need freedom from unnecessary poking by others, as was the case with me.
    I took leave and this time there was no farewell.
     
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  2. jayasala42

    jayasala42 IL Hall of Fame

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    Some 30 years back as soon as we say that we are employed in such and such a place,immediately they will ask"what are you?what is your designation/etc etc. Now many have stopped asking such questions.
    Soon on retirement, the ego attached to the chair starts vanishing.We have seen Mr.Talwar, chairman of SBI ,simply walking into the bank with an umbrella in his hand, waiting in the cash counter like anyone else after his retirement.
    When you enter office, you have scant regard.It is better not to visit your office after retirement.
    Everything in this world has a charm lasting for a few years only.At 20, a girl looks so beautiful and is proud of her looks, At 40 ,as a mother of teen ager,she starts greying,her face revealing lots of worries,.The charm is lost.At 50 only wrinkles and brown spots .where has the charm gone?
    At 18 the boy entering into IIT is brimming with confidence.But he may not get that much of covetable opportunities dreamt by him.His friend, not so brilliant may start his own business may be higher in the ladder.
    At 40 one who has built a palacial Bangalow may talk about the beauty of the mansion, hi-fi lighting and luxurious Italian furnishings etc etc.At 70, when he is unable to move out he gets confined to his small bed room? All the other spacious halls seem to mock at him.
    When you had so much of credit cards /debit cards you were proud to have a stack of cards in your purse.At 85 you don't know which card to use, which password to use, .You have such a low vision that you don't know to differentiate between currencies, even unable to identify persons.Loss of memory sets in.You may forget your own name and address and you may have to carry an identity card with you.

    We may not even know whom to pray and what to pray.
    This bundle of 'EGO' is fit for nothing.
    Somebody said EGO means'Edging God Out'
    When we have max pride about our intelligence, status and possessions we have only ourselves as the topmost priority. Love, sympathy etc representing divinity keep a distance- a long distance-from us.Now after retirement ,when we realise the actual values in life,we long for His grace.
    Many are not fortunate ,suffer with diseases, void of love from spouse and children.Is it again another EGO-Edging Grace Out?

    jayasala42
     
  3. Amulet

    Amulet IL Hall of Fame

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    As You Like It, Act II, Scene VII .

    Jaques to Duke Senior
    All the world’s a stage,
    And all the men and women merely players;
    They have their exits and their entrances,
    And one man in his time plays many parts,
    His acts being seven ages. At first, the infant,
    Mewling and puking in the nurse’s arms.
    Then the whining schoolboy, with his satchel
    And shining morning face, creeping like snail
    Unwillingly to school. And then the lover,
    Sighing like furnace, with a woeful ballad
    Made to his mistress’ eyebrow. Then a soldier,
    Full of strange oaths and bearded like the pard,
    Jealous in honor, sudden and quick in quarrel,
    Seeking the bubble reputation
    Even in the cannon’s mouth. And then the justice,
    In fair round belly with good capon lined,
    With eyes severe and beard of formal cut,
    Full of wise saws and modern instances;
    And so he plays his part. The sixth age shifts
    Into the lean and slippered pantaloon,
    With spectacles on nose and pouch on side;
    His youthful hose, well saved, a world too wide
    For his shrunk shank, and his big manly voice,
    Turning again toward childish treble, pipes
    And whistles in his sound. Last scene of all,
    That ends this strange eventful history,
    Is second childishness and mere oblivion,
    Sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything.
    If Shakespeare's 7 stages of life had gone through an Indian life, we'd have gone from baby, to student working hard at cramming whatever the teachers told him to so that he can get into Engineering or Medicine or at least Commerce, and then the tough exams for becoming an employee of a nationalized bank, more exams to get promotions, suffering the emotional trauma of transfers, enduring a long careeeer of mostly disappointments with occasional bright spots, and then a fiefdom of a branch of one's own only to realize that one has to do all the work of everybody, and get blamed only for debacles of bad loans, etc.. etc.. to finally reach the blessed relief of a VRS. and so on...
     
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  4. Viswamitra

    Viswamitra IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Hariji,

    After reading feedback from @jayasala42 and @Amulet, I am not sure what else I could say? A very well written thread and excellent responses already.

    The successful management is described as making ourselves redundant even when we are working. Like businesses, we keep improving our skills and adapt to the changes throughout our career so that we don't become obsolete. However, age is something we don't have control over. Retirement is a precursor for us to know that the world is going to move on even after we no longer exist.

    Viswa
     
  5. HariLakhera

    HariLakhera Platinum IL'ite

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    Thanks, Jayasala. You have summed it up beautifully. At every stage of life, there are pleasures and pains. As someone said, at 20 I wanted to change the world, at 70 I have started changing myself.
    There is no stage where we can feel safe except when we were infants. And still then we cried when hungry or wet.
    Working life has its own challenges and rewards. The truth is no one is indispensable.
     
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  6. HariLakhera

    HariLakhera Platinum IL'ite

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    Yes, the world is a stage. The seven stages, as explained in Indian context are full of challenges, fights, success, failure and so on and the only thing constant is change. Nothing stays.
    Working life is yet another role we play on this stage according to our capabilities and ambitions. Kings also die.
    The clear option is to live with purpose. One will be remembered for that only otherwise millions go to dust unsung.
     
  7. HariLakhera

    HariLakhera Platinum IL'ite

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    Dear Viswa,
    You are very right. The previous posts have said all what is to be said about life.
    Retirement, from job or business, is also a part of life. It is said that the first generation works hard to create wealth, the second enjoys it and the third squanders it. Another generation comes to start all over again.
     
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  8. Amulet

    Amulet IL Hall of Fame

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    I am sure that this point (the need for purpose/ambition in life) has been discussed a lot, here and elsewhere.
    I see the cumulative happiness level of stage-5,6&7 in life of those who are slightly-above-average to be much better than all others. Those who seek a purpose, or contrive to have an ambition (either their own or given to them by their elders), never seems to have had enough; and those who are below average seems to struggle for the basic (Roti, Kapda, Makhan) comforts of life. It is best to be above average, and instead of purpose or ambition, have projects and "deliverables". And at the end of a happy life, no need for songs to be sung in praise. Everybody would know (without having to say) that she lived an average life, made 30,000 pots of Rasam, almost all of them with the right amount of salt.
     
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  9. Cheeniya

    Cheeniya Super Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Hariji
    Absolutely right! I have witnessed dozens of farewell parties in State Bank. The parties would be most enthusiastic when the staff bade farewell to 'difficult' bosses obviously indicating how happy they were in seeing him go! Whenever a highly proactive and friendly person left, there would be more emotional speeches than items to eat.
    Sri
     
  10. HariLakhera

    HariLakhera Platinum IL'ite

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    [QUOTE="Amulet Everybody would know (without having to say) that she lived an average life, made 30,000 pots of Rasam, almost all of them with the right amount of salt.[/QUOTE]
    Just for fun. An elderly women decides to hire a maid as a cook. The
    negotiations proceeded like this:
    Lady: We are two at home. How much would you charge?
    Cook: How many roties will I have to cook?
    Lady: Why roties only? you have to cook rice, daal, vegetables as we wish.
    Cook: Fine but how many roties?
    Lady: Say 10 roties.
    Cook: Rs. 3000/- a month.
    Lady: That's Rs. 3 for each roti. I will call you.
    During the day she started counting how many roties she made in her 40 years of married life say 15 roties a day multiplied by 365 days multiplied by 40 years and finaly multiplied by Rs. 3 for a roti. total Rs. 657000/-
    And she sadly realised that all this plus all other household work she has been doing for bread, clothe and shelter only. What a pity!!!
     

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