May be going alone can help you to get some clarity. If you work in USA, explore EAP , they cover free sessions. Do you have GC or your own visa. You cannot do anything now. You cannot force him to love or respect you. It take time for him to give up his ego. But you can make your life better, focus on you & kids, depend on day cares for kids, dont invite your or his parents here all the time. Let him take his own time to come back to you. He is will runway if you chase him or show that you are so desperate to have him in your life. You need to show your strong avatar. Neglect his behavior, try to emotionally detach. Try to make your home a happy one , try to avoid more arguments. Behave as if you are preparing for your own life. I can understand, the trauma you are going through. Its sad to live in this kind of marriage with no love,care or respect. You need to demand respect and stop him from disrespecting you . Dont be his doormat. Your kids will also learn that behavior. No more arguments, and show that you are not interested in him. The fact that your kid dont like him is a big red flag. If he cannot be a good father, what the use. It will be damaging if parents treat each other this way, and if abuse is involved. Its better to be in two happy homes than being with unhappy parents. What message she get? I am against any kind of divorce/separation. But if physical abuse is involved, its not a safe place to live in. Take a break emotionally from this relationship. You and yours kids should be your priority now. Be practical. Give more time and have lot of patience.