Quid Pro Quo With The Gods

Cheeniya: Does sokanasanah scare you?
Ira: Scare? Scare is a tiny word for the fear he induces in me. Does he scare you?
Cheeniya: I started watching Nat Geo to fact-check not knowing when sokanasanah would ambush.
Ira: Any use? I mean the Nat Geo? Should I also subscribe?
Cheeniya: I learnt how lobsters molt their shells.
Ira: I think I should subscribe.

 

Hindi like Sanskrit is a rare praise. Hindi like Tamil is a slight. I've never been good at gendered languages. If there are verb inflections based on the gender of a thing, I get confused to recall if cabbage is a male or a female. I don't know how Sanskrit is. Does it also have "ki" and "ka" distinction? Aloo ki sabzi/Aloo ka sabzi.

I don't know which zealot introduced gender-driven verbs. What is the use? What is the purpose? Does it even benefit the speaker in the short or long run? If the vegetables wished to be segregated as male and female and imperil their dull lives with hard-won romances, then they would evolve on their own into demarcated species. Why impose such ridiculous personification on unsuspecting vegetables who are clueless that they transition into a gender in our grocery stores and kitchens.

 

That was in your case. I speak non-stop and incoherent in every language that the other person hardly makes any sense of my blabber. People ask me to slow down, and if that does work, to shut up. Hindi, English, or vernacular, they are marred by the same untiring motor mouth. You won't believe the number of times I have been asked to shut up and threatened with flex-cuffs (to prevent typing) and gag (to prevent talking). A taxi driver politely asking you to converse with him in English is unheard of in my foul experiences. In my case, he would have unceremoniously dropped me off in the middle of nowhere unable to bear my incessant chatter.

On that note, did you ever realise how much you are profiled by the taxi drivers?

You engage them for five minutes and they tease out details ...you work for ...you are likely from this place ...you are going to visit someone who is, you grew up playing kabaddi here, you won't like this road, you should go to that mall, you should eat here, you will find this fare upstanding (the last one I never found upright. I feel like I am double-charged — one for my travel and one for my chatter).

 

I take those three cheers as a cheer each for abolish of a gender. It is heartening to read your despise for gendered language. I don't even understand such subtleties to master. Language can be clear even when unsubtle. Do we really need to dress up our vegetables in dhoti and pattu pavadai before slicing and dicing them?

People find it very agonising when they are stunted by a "writer's block". I wonder what must it be like to have a "talker's block". You cannot express in speech. You are muted of thoughts and feelings. What must that be like! Chatterboxes and gabbers are oblivious to such maladies. Teachers wish such afflictions can be induced within a chatty group. Chatters are wired to talk non-stop, in that, it is inconceivable for them to imagine a plight where they hit a snag and their vocal chords are clogged up. If you ask me, I don't know how that would play out also. You simply shrug or shift the gaze or how would you even convey this vocal indisposition in a talker's block.

 

In the year 2075, one iLite to another iLite

“Go and sokanise your post” (spell-check and proof-read)
“You are acting like a sokanasanah” (test the elastic limits of a topic)
“You have explained in a sokanasic manner” (eloquent and insightful)
“What a sokanasan-ah!” (happy interjection!)
“Thank you for that sokanized post” (helpful links and friendly and simplified explanation)

A befuddled newbie inquires, “What is all that sokanasanah figure of speech?”

Senior iLite responds, “He was a legend. He was formidable. He was an enigma. To honour him, we have developed the sokanasanah figure of speech. Y'notice, that 8-week edit time-window is because of his relentless campaign. In 2017, two mischievous ramblers captured the essence of sokanasanah in their dialogue titled ‘Who is not afraid of sokanasanah’. ”