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Question By A Kid

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by periamma, Jan 13, 2019.

  1. periamma

    periamma IL Hall of Fame

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    A boy who is eight yrs.old is on a visit to India to enjoy his vacation with his grandparents.First two days he stays with his Paternal grand parents and next one week with his maternal grandma.This is a routine in his visit.This year also he spent his time with Paternal grandparents and then went to his maternal grandma's house.Two days passed and then he became restless and asked a question to his Parents."Guys you both want to be with your Parents and you haven't thought about me. Like you I WANT TO ENJOY THE VACATION WITH MY PARENTS THAT IS WITH YOU BOTH.Now find a solution for this problem.His Mom and Dad were speechless and they had no answer for the question.This is a general problem for those who visit India and mostly the Girls are the target.How many days to stay with in-laws house and with Parents. Now the kids are very shrewd and ask such question.My grandson Krish asked this question to his parents.Then my son went there at nights to make his son happy.Luckily my dil's Mother is near by within two km distance from our house.
    My dil is a working woman and so i ask her to spend more time with her mother and take a complete rest and get refreshed.Of late the NRI kids are getting bored as they have no company to play due to Acadamy system in India.Their cousins go to school and they feel lonely.They are restricted to see TV programs and play games in I-PAD.
    Now i am scared whether my grandkids would avoid Indian trip in future.
     
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  2. PushpavalliSrinivasan

    PushpavalliSrinivasan IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Periamma,
    NRI kids who are born and brought up in a foreign country will definitely get bored when they come to India. Mostly they come here in the last week of June or first week of July and here schools reopen in mid June and so they don't have company.
    Some grandparents can't speak in English and some who can converse in English also find it difficult to understand due to their American accent.
    PS
     
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  3. jayasala42

    jayasala42 IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Periamma,
    This is a common problem at every home.Upto six years they may like to be pampered by grandparents.Later they want company of their own.They may like to visit any other part of the globe, other than the country of grandparents. They are bored with Idli, dosa and visiting temple after temple having Darshan of same elephant faced God, Shiva lingam or Lord Vishnu or Krishna in good attires.When I took my grand son aged 4 for Hanumath Jayanthi, he was expecting people to sing'Happy Birthday Hanuman'.
    Let them live their life happily and we will have life of our own.
    My relative has some heart problem. When he had to be admitted for the first time, daughter and two sons visited. Next time, a son alone came. Third time, an e-mail was recd.
    " Amma, we are sorry.We are unable to make the trip. Kindly inform us onlywhen an unfortunate thing happens".May look rude.But that is the reality all parents face.After 15 years our children too may have to face a still worse situation.
    jayasala 42
     
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  4. joylokhi

    joylokhi Platinum IL'ite

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    Very true. Once children have stayed away for some time - say a few years, they get used to their place and naturally they are in their comfort zone only with their parents and friends. Trying to keep them occupied by visits to eateries, parks etc will work only upto some 7 years or so. after that , Im sure as u say the restlessness will creep in. Its a sad situation, but once they have decided to settle abroad, we just have to accept the reality and go along!
     
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  5. kkrish

    kkrish IL Hall of Fame

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    @periamma
    True Rukmini about the cousins going to school.

    My children enjoyed the company of their grandparents, aunts, and uncles and would have lot of discussions about pre-independent India days with my f-i-l and father.
    We also went to trips to historical places in India.

    The only reason our trips to India with the children dwindled as they grew into teenagers was their own school demands.
    From middle-school onward, (eighth grade) the curriculum in the US begins to tighten and the children get involved in summer activities such as social service, academic enrichment classes, internships, sports ...etc. All these are important for their growth and academic pursuits.

    So reason for not visiting India is not really boredom or disinterest in interacting with their families and friends in India.
     
    Last edited: Jan 13, 2019
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  6. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan Finest Post Winner

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    :hello: To OP & to those Who responded already here before me.
    When we see CLEAVELAND Sundaram in Chennai with those recommended for arengetram, I found those US settled shishyas glueing to their grand parents enjoying
    Singing and praising their grandparents about good nurturing of their parents. They seemed to like about everything - the audience, the catering arrangements in the vicinity of venue etc.
    2. THE ABOVE SHISHYAS MAY BE AN EXCEPTION while majority of visiting children may decide not to just visit again their grand parents in India.
    3. When I camped with my family in SAMBANDIS’ house first few days I felt good. From day 3 & 4 I began getting bored just because I was not able to remain my usual self and do things according to my whims and fancies. EAST or WEST - HOME IS THE BEST!
    Thanks and Regards.
    God lends Succor to those who feel AT HOME even if it’s North Pole Or South Pole!
     
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  7. jskls

    jskls Finest Post Winner

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    True Periamma that until kids are 10 India visits are pleasurable as they do not know much and go with the flow. But later they can’t connect unless the grand parent is heavily involved. Also once middle school comes they have their own challenges. And also not everyone in India has the time to spend with these kids when they are there as they have their day to day activities (school work) etc. Harsh truth of life. None to blame.
     
  8. Viswamitra

    Viswamitra IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Periamma,

    Whether my son enjoyed his trips to India or not, everyone around our in-laws home in India fell in love with him. He always talk to everyone the same way he talks to his family members. As soon as he got out of the car, he hugged the watchman and the maid who kept our apartment door opened. As soon as he got off the immigration and customs, he found the car driver and gave him a big hug. He is known as the nicest NRI child in our apartments. He used to play with even small children. He always wears his headset and listen to music 24/7 and brings all the necessary devices to charge all of his gadgets.He always traveled with us and stayed with both his parents in every place.

    His Tamil is not very fluent but can understand well. His demands are very unique with respect to the places he wanted to visit. Santhome Church, St. Thomas Mount, historical museums, specific Coffee Shop, Any restaurant that sells Dahi Vada, etc. Only once he traveled alone to India to Chennai to have dharshan of Sri Sathya Sai Baba. My parents-in-law were kind enough to take him by car to Puttaparthi. After reading all His Vaginis, he told me that he wanted to have dharshan. He visited Baba in December and Baba left His mortal coil in April. I heard he gave a letter to Baba and Baba took his letter.
     
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  9. GeetaKashyap

    GeetaKashyap IL Hall of Fame

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    @periamma,

    Whatever you fear or feel are all possibilities; que sera sera...
    whatever will be will be.
    The future is not ours to see..
    Que sera sera
     
  10. periamma

    periamma IL Hall of Fame

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    @PushpavalliSrinivasan Thanks PS Mam.Language is not a problem for me.My daughter's two sons speak fluently in Tamil with Madurai slang. i join them playing games and watching cartoon network .whenever they come i buy a set of books and they spent time on reading books.In the recent visit in last July they both joined Tennis coaching And no complaints from them.Now the gentleman who feel restless is my son's son who is from Australia.He is a single child and wants to be with his parents.Very matured for his age .
     
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