Psychology of Men and Women- Very True

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by lavii, Nov 20, 2009.

  1. lavii

    lavii Gold IL'ite

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    <TABLE class=MsoNormalTable style="MARGIN: auto 6.75pt; mso-cellspacing: 0in; mso-yfti-tbllook: 1184; mso-table-lspace: 9.0pt; mso-table-rspace: 9.0pt; mso-table-anchor-vertical: paragraph; mso-table-anchor-horizontal: column; mso-table-left: left; mso-padding-alt: 0in 0in 0in 0in" cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 align=left border=0><TR style="mso-yfti-irow: 0; mso-yfti-firstrow: yes; mso-yfti-lastrow: yes"><TD style="BORDER-RIGHT: #d4d0c8; PADDING-RIGHT: 0in; BORDER-TOP: #d4d0c8; PADDING-LEFT: 0in; PADDING-BOTTOM: 0in; BORDER-LEFT: #d4d0c8; PADDING-TOP: 0in; BORDER-BOTTOM: #d4d0c8; BACKGROUND-COLOR: transparent" vAlign=top>Women - Multiple process
    Women's brians designed to concentrate multiple task at a time. Women can Watch a TV and Talk over phone and cook the new recipes.
    Men - Single Process
    Men's brain designed to concentrate only one work at a time. Men can not watch a TV and talking in phone same time. He stops the TV while Talking. He can either watch TV or talk over phone or cook.


    ANALYTICAL SKILL
    Men's brain has lot of space for handling the analytical process. So easily he can analyze and find the solution for a process.
    He can design (blue print) a map of a building easily.
    If a complex map is viewed by women, she can not understand it. She can not understand the details of the map easily.
    For her it is dump of lines in a paper.

    CAR DRIVING.
    While driving a car, men's analytical spaces are used in his brain. He can drive a car fastly. if he see an object at long
    distance, immediately his brain classifies the object(bus or van or car) direction and speed of the object and driving accordingly. Where as women take a long time to recognise the object direction/ speed. His single process mind stops the audio in the car(if any), then concentrating only on the driving.
    You can offen watch, while men driving the car fastly, the women sit next to him will shoult, "GO SLOW" , "CARE FULL", "AAHHH", "OHH GOD.."

    LIE
    Many times, when men lie to women face to face, they got caught easily. Her super natural brain observes the facial expression 70%, and the body language 20% and the words comes from mouth 10%. So he is easily caught while lieing.
    Men's brain does not have this.
    Women easily lie to men face to face.
    So guys, While lieing to your girls, use phone, or letter or close all the lights or cover your/her face with blanket.
    Don't lie face to face.

    PROBLEM.
    End of day, if men have lot of problems, his brain clearely classifys the problems and put into individual rooms of brain, the problems in individual room of brain and finding the solution one by one. You can see many guys looking on the sky's for a long times. If you disturb him, he gets irritated.
    End of Day, if women have lot of problems, her brain can not clasify the problems. she wants some one to hear that. After telling everything to a person she goes happily to bed. She does not worry abt the problem solved or not.

    LANGUAGE.
    Women can easily learn many many languages. Her brain set up. But can not find the solutions to problems
    Men can not easily learn languages, he can easily solve the problems.
    3 year old gal has three times higher vocabulary than 3 year old boy.

    MEN
    Men want status, success, solutions, big process… etc
    Women want relationship, friends, family...etc…

    UNHAPPY
    if women unhappy with their relations, she can not concentrate on work.
    If men unhappy with their work, he can not concentrae on the relations.

    MAP
    Men can easily locate the place in a complex map. His analytical brain does this. While watching a cricket match in a stadium with full of crowd, men can leave his seat to T shop and keeps everything in his mind and comes back to his seat with out problems. He uses his analytical skills space of brain.
    Women can't do this. They offen lost their way to their seat.

    LIFE
    Life is very easy to Men. One good job, One alcohol bottle is enough for him.
    Women want everything in life.

    SPEECH
    Women use indirect languages in speech.
    Geetha asked Vijay, "vijay do you like to have a cup of cofee?"
    This means, Geetha really want a cup of cofee.
    In the morning......."Darling, do you think, will it be good to have an Omlette for breakfast"
    Men use direct language. "Geetha, I want to have a cup of cofee, Pls stop the car when you see a cofee shop".
    In the morning...."Darling, Can you please prepare an omlette for breakfast".

    HANDLING EMOTION
    Women talk a lot without thinking, if they are in emotion.
    Men act a lot with out thinking.



    NICKNAMES

    If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.

    If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.

    EATING OUT

    When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in £20, even though it's only for £32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.

    When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

    MONEY

    A man will pay £2 for a £1 item he needs.
    A woman will pay £1 for a £2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.

    BATHROOMS

    A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from M&S.

    The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337.
    A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.


    OFFSPRING

    Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children.
    She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.

    A man is vaguely aware of some people living in the house.

     
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