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Play Date Planning

Discussion in 'Schoolgoers & Teens' started by Jas82688, Jan 21, 2020.

  1. Jas82688

    Jas82688 Silver IL'ite

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    hello ladies,

    Am planning for a play date for my daughter .. she is in elementary 1 st grade .. I never host a play date nor she went to others home .. so I don’t know what are the guidelines for it ..here are my question hope experienced moms can answer

    1.Can you arrange play date with just one friend ..? What time is best ..?
    2.Are parents allowed ..? I would prefer that
    3. How long it can go do you inform parents prior this time lines ..?
    4. Can you offer food ..? Like dessert snack Which is homemade ..? If so what are the choices .. what do you offer for adults coffee tea snack ..?
    5. How do you plan to entertain them ..? My kids have just lot of toys dolls books but nothing fancy .

    May be I did not cover all the things others do at play date.. so let me know how can i host it decently.. she likes this kid do I wanted the other kid and her mom feel comfortable at my home ..
     
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  2. peartree

    peartree Platinum IL'ite

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    Hi Jas

    Welcome to the world of playdates!! Sometimes, it seems like it is all I do for my pre-Ker, text other parents or respond to text from other parents for a request for playdates :-D

    There are no specific guidelines I follow!! I sometimes just have the parent drop off the child and usually, the kids are just doing their own stuff by themselves. My daughter, who constantly needs attention pretty much just forgets the rest of us when she has a friend over. So there is no need to any fancy toys or anything. The kids will figure it out themselves with what they have!!

    About offering the child stuff to eat, I just ask the parents themselves if they have any specific restrictions (mainly allergies) and might offer them a cookie or fruit, which is usually safe bet always. If in doubt, I just text the parent during the playdate and ask them if it is OK for the child to eat a particular thing or not.

    If I do have a parent stay over for the duration of the play date, it is uaully because I already know them well and we are just casually chatting while drinking a cup of tea and snacking on any general stuff that is available at home. But most of the times, play dates are usually time for the other parents to get a break to go do their thing for a couple of hours and for me to do amy thing, because my kid hardly asks for my attention while having a friend over.

    In short, just be casual. There are no set of rules or guidelines that apply to play dates!!
     
    Rihana likes this.
  3. Rihana

    Rihana Finest Post Winner

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    Hey Jas,

    My experience is dated but I love these questions as they remind me of the things I fretted over and didn't need fretting, so I should not fret now. : )

    1. Keep it casual. The entire thing. This will help deal with disappointment if the other kid doesn't show up, shows up very late, etc.

    2. Best time: after lunch and ending well before either kid's dinner time. Hungry kids are cranky kids.

    3. Food: Initially, I would avoid home made stuff. Easier if you can name the thing/brand and ask parent if OK to serve that to kid. And, make it a non-negotiable rule that all food and drink including water has to be consumed at the dinner table or in the kitchen.

    4. The thing that starts to make you annoyed with the other parent is if they turn out to be chronic late to pick up and you are not close enough with them to not mind it. So, set this expectation from the start. Mention you having to step out at 6:15 if the pickup time is 6. I finally ended up with the strategy of dropping off the playdate kid, and the other mom's used to also do the same. That way the playdate host mom has some leeway - if the kids are getting bored, she can ask the other mom if she can drop off kid earlier than planned.

    5. The kids will entertain themselves. But, it doesn't hurt to have some new game or puzzle as a backup. I used to have at least 4-5 of these bought from the dollar store etc. In first grade, they are easily entertained. I remember piggy-bank that counts the money, playing cards, flash cards, and other no-battery junk held their interest so well. A water color box and a roll of drawing paper or books from the library that the kids haven't seen yet. Try to keep the playdate free of electronics until the last 10-15 minutes. You are putting in effort, the kids might as well socialize and stay away from electronics.

    If you let them use a computer, put a tape over the webcam. I would in fact not make wi-fi accessible to the kids.

    I also taught my child to cover his/her bed with a huge generic bedsheet, and that stayed on throughout the playdate. I somehow didn't like other kids with "outside" clothes and possibly dirty feet on our beds. Assign one bathroom for the kids to use. Easier to clean up later.

    Parent staying over is a pain unless you are already friends with the parent or actively interested in being friends. It becomes harder to discipline the kids if needed. And also, you have to watch what you talk as the kids can overhear. Inevitably talk turns to school stuff, and sometimes it is best kids don't hear all that parents talk about schools.

    If you have a younger one, do not hesitate to plan it around his/her sleep time. The other parent will understand.
     
  4. Jas82688

    Jas82688 Silver IL'ite

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    Thanks @Rihana @peartree for beautiful tips will fallow then .. yes I would love to keep it simple ..
     

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