Planning a Baby on Studying, Need Insights please :)

Hello EveryOne!! I've been reading many topics since a week, am already a fan of IndusLadies, and trust everyone's opinion/experiences .

This is my first post, being married for 1.5 yrs, next in the sequel is pregnancy. I am studying my MS and am in the second semester. I expect to finish my Masters by December 2012. Next come my OPT period, where in I can start looking for jobs aggressively. I seem to be wanting babies more these days, though Ive tried to postpone this as much as possible earlier. After a thorough thought, I came up with a plan which is trying to fix giving birth to a baby by next December, by the time I graduate. And then, I can have my baby earlier, as well as take a complete advantage of my OPT. My Mom would be here to help me. My DH makes 95k. Taking into account my college fees and other miscellaneous expenses, can we afford the baby now? I plan to work or expect to get a job and will put in my full effort. I tried talking to DH, he says lets wait another year. But then the scenario becomes having a kid by next December or after 2 years, when I would be 30. I want to have a healthy stress free pregnancy, which is possible now, since my classes are only twice every week. I somehow imagine, first preganancy would be difficult in a newly found job or internship. How do I convince my husband? Is my plan making any sense. Or am I rushing?

Ladies and Friends!!! I need your precious advice/opinions, and experiences if you had any of this kind. Eagerly waiting for responses. Thank You

 

Hello Sweetyk, that was a good piece of information. Are you a Mom already? I am also worried about the finances, as of now my Husband is the only earner. Tough decision to make, especially when we try to plan. We would be ready to accept things as they are if they occur unplanned though

 

Hello "WhyMeGod", am very sorry to know what you had to go through. I wish you loads of strength and positive energy. I really appreciate you giving me a detailed encouraging picture despite the situation you are in. I now understand its totally in the God's hands, no matter how well we plan. My husband is getting onto my track after 3 days of discussion . I might visit the doctor next week to get an overall check up. Thank You Very Much, that information is definitely very helpful. My friendly piece of advice to you would be, please don't get depressed, I know its easier said than done. I wish you all the luck in future .

 

Hello Neha1, This seems to be a perfect timing for planning a baby. Some even told me, getting pregnant is easier on student visa than on working visa, because you can take classes online accordingly. If this doesnt apply to you ignore it ;P. One of my cousins started working recently, and is pregnant now. She says its being very difficult for her to gather so much of energy for morning sickness, cooking, working and so on.. Her opinion is that she wasted quality time when she didnt work(pregnancy would have been much easier and relaxing when not working), and you can take care of yourself very well when you are at home. But, I heard from another student in my class that its very hard to concentrate when you are studying and pregnant at the same time. And, internships and first jobs are more difficult to be found during the pregnancy. The employers simply do not want to hire pregnant women, because they wouldn't be willing to fore go compromise on their projects, and that our work wouldn't be more productive. Things would be different if we already are working with them for a considerable period. Finally, as Chailover said, its good to have a healthier pregnancy when we are young and energetic.

In my scenario, unfortunate to say, but had to postpone things. I might have to relocate in order to find internships and land into a first job. So, I do not want to deal with multiple things at the same time. I will first give jobs a try and then pregnancy. We also have some financial commitments back home.This would be hectic on my husband. If you are expecting EAD soon, you might consider planning pregnancy now. All the Best to you, and do drop me a line if you need more.

Cheers,
confusedbrain.

 

Hello Chailover, thank you for the valuable advice. It is indeed very true. I hate to say, we had to postpone things for now, but still plan to get things done before 30. Like in an year and a half. I am already starting to see the decreased functioning of my body . Joint pains, weakness, back aches and the list goes on... I can't imagine how I will be able to manage the house when I have kids .

Thanks,
confusedbrain.