Pils Never Call My Parents

I don't find it too abnormal. My parents talk to my mil on phone on when I give her phone while talking to them. They don't otherwise talk to each other.

 

I have the same probl as u do .. the best to keep peace just leave it .. they will never understand bcz they think they r gods n it's dil n their parents to call ..I think a lot n I feel bad but my parents say it's ok we don't mind it.. on top they don't pick at one complete call ,my parents have to give multiple calls and yes they don't have anything else to do they r free all time..

.. I did once asked them when we were in argument she told m mil that's y and changed it by saying my son told I will call u bcz calls from India r expensive but now even though free calls they still don't..

 

I wonder, do your PILs call your parents or visit them, when they are inviting them for functions and other events? I think that is the minimum requirement for In-laws relations. From what I have noticed, my parents and my in-laws have very little in common to talk about, and all conversation is perfunctory. Despite whatsapp and other cheap ways to communicate, there is little motivation for conversation since there is nothing to talk about UNLESS there is an event that must be shared.

I used to reach out to my MIL, and she would appreciate it. But again, conversation is very awkward, so recently, I have not communicated unless I have to wish them for New Years or Diwali. I think that you should let people do what is natural to them. Unless you have a very easy relationship with your MIL, I don't think suggesting her to talk to your mom would be wise. It's alright if they don't talk, though it would be nice if they were friends. My H does not talk to my parents, unless they call him repeatedly. It's improved recently (he actually picks up their phone call, if he's available), but he still avoids calling them, and asks me to call them if there is any advice that he wants from my father.

 

Looks like your parents and PILs don't have much in common and keep cordial relation just on occasions..
Too much familiarity and closeness sometimes causes problem and misunderstanding sometimes...little distance is good between Sambhandhis.
I would not disturb this arrangement if I were u..

 

In many cases, it's better to keep this relationship very formal.

Just like your parents call for formal invites, ask your hubby or his parents to call for inviting them formally too.

If it's about wishing for festivals n stuff, your parents can slowly reduce it n eventually stop if your in laws never call even once.

You can test this very lightly with your mil but would recommend not to push it too much at the same time encourage your parents to limit it too, so you don't feel bad about this whole subject.

 

Next time DH complains about not having called his mom tell him nicely that BOTH of you from now on should set aside 30 mins a week to talk to your respective MIL’s. And dial your mom’s number and hand over the phone to patidev.

I am joking ! Don’t disturb your new married life over this.

 

Hi Op,

My opinion is different,

1. If your in laws are not interested no need to ask them or request them to speak with your parents.

2. If your in laws are good with you, no need to spoil or ruin your relation with them.

3. Ask your parents not to involve your in laws in every function or gathering nor need to call them.

Let the elders manage thing in their own sweet way, and you better enjoy your time with your husband.

 

Be grateful for small mercies. Rel forum has many threads detailing what happens when ILs phone DIL's parents.