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Phone calls to MIL

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by oohlala, Aug 27, 2014.

  1. oohlala

    oohlala Senior IL'ite

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    My MIL expects me to call her every week. I do not have time to talk to her but I have been still calling her. When I call, she talks and talks about nothing that involves me. She talks about all the people in her area and she talks about co-sis. She praises co-sis and finds way to insult me indirectly. I am tired of talking to her. I am very busy and talking to her makes me feel bad and wastes my time.
    Then on top of it, sometimes she will in addition call me 1-2 times the same week and talk and talk. Talking to her 2-3 times a week is too much and drives me crazy! How do I get out of this setup? Do you think it is ok for me to just stop calling her? She is last person I want to talk to and talking every week is too much. I have to take care of my baby and can not be insulted all this time. She makes me feel bad and wastes my time.
     
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  2. yellowmango

    yellowmango IL Hall of Fame

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    If she calls ...let her do it.If husband is around...give him the phone.
    If you call...do it when husband is around.Say your greetings and tell her baby is crying,you talk to your son.Let her son listen to her gossip.May be he will get tired and tell her to keep it short.
     
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  3. dhivyamani

    dhivyamani Junior IL'ite

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    hi,
    relax.... I also face the same problem 1 year ago.... I don't like to speak with my MIL's offend ... so I said one day to her I don't have time to speak to others including my mom also I wont speak... I have to do lot of works to do and then I have to cook or feed my baby.... so that day itself she stopped... if suppose she called I told her that I'm swipe floor, cleaning bathroom or my son is sleep I have to do all work like that and she said ok and I said once completed my work i call you....
     
  4. anahita5

    anahita5 Gold IL'ite

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    whenever she calls, do activities that involve noise. Put her on speaker and forget about it...Show her you are very busy and don't get time. Do it slowly, if you cut it off in one instance, she will become suspicious.
     
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  5. DKI

    DKI Platinum IL'ite

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    Calls to my parents last max 20 mins. To my in-laws nothing less than 90 mins. No matter how many times a week we call.

    These days we take turns to call. And all our calls are usually when we are driving. We use earphones or bluetooth since in our state we are not allowed to hold a phone and drive. My drives to work are 20 - 25 mins. If need be one morning I will call them as soon as I back up (they are here with us now, so phone issue is not there). But this way, the call has to be dropped in 20 mins.

    So why don't you call if you have to drive with your kid somewhere? That way when you park at your destination, you can simply say "mom, I have to cut the call now" So even if it is multiple calls, they only last less than 30 mins.
     
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  6. oohlala

    oohlala Senior IL'ite

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    My MIL loves to talk. She just talks and talks. Even when I try to cut the phone, she talks over me. She makes sure that the call is at least 30 min long. I do not talk to anyone on the phone for 30 min and that too every week!
    And she expects me to call her when I am alone, not when my DH is back home from work. She acts as if since I do not work, I am sitting at home doing nothing and have time to talk to her! I have told her I am very busy, yet she does not get it. She thinks I have time to call, no excuse.
    Everytime I talk to her, she makes me feel bad. By the time I feel better, the week has passed and time to call her again!
     
  7. persecutedDIL

    persecutedDIL Gold IL'ite

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    So, why don't you take up some part-time work or join a hobby class. How old is your baby ? If I were you, I would not call her. Though I would take the call and cut off after 10mins citing some reason - some kitchen work, someone's phone call, someone at the door - each time different excuse. But be polite always without being friendly.
     
  8. GoogleGlass

    GoogleGlass IL Hall of Fame

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    Tell your DH if he would understand and enact an ENT problem if he doesn't maintain secrecy.
     
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  9. oohlala

    oohlala Senior IL'ite

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    GoogleGlass, what is ENT?
     
  10. Weasly

    Weasly Gold IL'ite

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    ear nose throat !!
     
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