Paradise Lost and Rediscovered

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[JUSTIFY]I am sitting in the park today. There are a lot of mothers with their babies come to spend and evening in the fresh air. It has just rained and the trees and bushes with their flowers are looking all freshly rain-washed. The sweet trills of various birds fill the air. All in all, it is a blissful feeling. There can be no greater happiness than this.

How long is it since I looked at a flower closely? How long since I heard a bird and noticed its trilling sound? How long is it since I looked at the full moon and could not take my eyes off it? When did I last look at the open sky and see the diamond studded space and delight in it?

My mind harks back to my younger days. There are some hazy memories of the joy and ecstasy felt at the sight of a dog, a cat, a rose, the beach, the picture of an elephant. Crazy? Did you just say “Little things please little minds”? Well I can certainly vouch for the pleasure that little things bring, but about the “little minds” bit, I am not so sure.

“Growing up” robs me of these little joys of life. No more the joys of stopping near a stream or a canal and peering in to see if there are any fish in it. No more running out to see the monkey man bringing his performing monkeys along. I am now a “big girl”. I am in a “big school” and going to higher classes. There is so much to study. Where is the time to “waste”? Human memory is short. Gradually the memory of the very existence of these joys is slowly erased from my mind.

In a few years time, along come my nephew and niece. I wake up early in the morning at 6 am, just to sit next to my 3 month old niece lying on the dining table, looking out of the kitchen window, watching the movements of the leaves on the drumstick tree and gurgling cooing at them. I carry my nephew who is crying out of the house to show him the dogs, cats, calf or a flower (apoo). We go for a walk, he perched on my 15 year old shoulders, like a little emperor surveying his little empire. We stop to look at the cow which is grazing on the plot of vacant land nearby. There are a couple of goats (attu kutty), and the little fella is fascinated by them. Our tour of the empire continues to a little canal (the geographical boundary of our little empire) nearby. We stop to check whether there is any water in it today. Then we return back to our little palace. We are very happy. All our troubles are forgotten. At home the emperor is treated to a story of the crow and the sparrow (kaka-kuruvi kadai) to make him eat. This is our little paradise. We need nothing more to complete our happiness.

The children grow up, start going to school, and I get busy with my college studies, job and various issues. Once more amnesia takes over. I don't remember when I forget these little things in life. Now other issues take over my life. My happiness is determined by whether I get admission to the desired college and to the course of my choice. I can only be happy if I do well enough to get admission to the best University to do my post-graduation. I also must have a moped to travel. My bicycle is no longer good enough for me. I must get a scholarship to study abroad, in order to prove myself. I want a TV at home to be able to watch Discovery and National Geographic, so that I can look “with it” when others discuss the programmes they watched. I can't afford the misery of appearing ignorant. Such ignominy that would be. I watch Jacques Cousteau and his voyages with rapt attention. I marvel at the secrets of the depths of the ocean. But do I know whether the jasmine tree outside has flowered? No prizes for guessing.

There are times when I get weary of the rat race. At such times I am reminded of W.H. Davies and his lines “What is this life if full of care, we have no time to stand and stare”. This is precisely my condition.

“Life” soon takes over. Adult life has replaced the joys of childhood and early youth. There is no time to stop and think. Life is like a roller coaster. You just go through all the ups and downs, clutching your head and tummy, without any control over what is happening.

TILL THE TIME COMES when middle age catches up. Much to my consternation and dismay, I are not able to keep pace with yourself. I cannot do what you did, say, 10 years ago. My body forces me to slow down. A temporary period of mental adjustment follows.

I no longer go hiking with friends. I do not go to the gym to keep fit. I go down to the park and take a few rounds and then sit down on the bench to relax. I notice the sunset. It is breathtaking. Then I watch the children, notice the flowers and the chirping birds. I go for a weekend to a jungle resort. It is pitch dark at night when I go for a walk. I look up. What a sight. The star studded sky reminds me of a georgette chiffon saree in ink blue studded with glittering chamkis. I suddenly realize that I have forgotten all about the existence of these little joys of life over all these years. Now is my time to set about the rediscovery of life, and of the little joys it brings. I rediscover that the best things in life are always free. And I am very glad to have them back. My body may not be as agile as it once was, but mentally I am 16 all over again. :cheers

A recent quote of Peter Matthiessen I read in “Speakingtree” sums up the whole process beautifully:

[/JUSTIFY]

 

Thanks so much Saras for the prompt feedback. Yours is the first one. thumbsup:thumbsup

 

Thanks very much Vijima for your feedback.

 

Dear Sudha,

Thanks so much for your sweet feed back. We really need to keep the child in us alive to enjoy the simple pleasures of life without which life becomes a terrible burden. Glad that you still feel young at heart. :cheers

 

Thanks so much Sree. You are right. Interacting here with so many people of all ages from all over the world is the most refreshing and interesting activity one can have and keeps all of us mentally agile and young at heart.