One After The Other, My H's Relatives Are Disconnecting With Us...

Are you a MIL? Or a SIL character who fuels the MIL to behave nasty?
The way you see things and take sides makes me doubt like this. If not, I see a one sided MIL on the make.

Did I tell you that MIL wasn't aware of the nippa virus? Did I tell you that we didn't make any attempt to make her aware on this? Did i tell you that we were not clear about our hygienic standards with PILs family before?
When everything was clear, then I believe my doubts are valid.
I don't jump to conclusion before giving second and third chances to the people. But there is a limit to everything.
I am seriously doubting them a lot now. I can't believe them anymore.

How can I ignore their past and the intention when they have not taken any attempt to change or at least to accept their mistake?
And why should I ignore them?
Do you want me and my family to fall prey to them one more time?
Sorry, I am not here to do that again.

In fact, We felt insulted by them on the chapati matter.
I, the wife and the mother of my little family is very much alive to cook and serve my family members. I have been doing that since marriage.
I don't want to allow anyone to take authority to cook and feed my H on a daily basis when I am there.
If it was just a casual food sharing, then that's a diff story. But cooking for my H on a daily basis, and forcing him to eat what they cook, and cursing him for not eating their food is very irritating.
At least they should have stopped when they learned the fact that we are not very happy about it. We have directly and indirectly told this to them diplomatically.
But they needed a harsh statement from their son to maintain their lines, which was perhaps insulting to them. But they asked for it.
Why can't you see this?????

I did not expect chocolates from PILs, but I was wondering why can't they share the chocolates which were readily available in their fridge, but they make sincere effort in peeling fruits, and cooking chapatis....
And more importantly, why do they open the chocolates, and then bring them to our home???
I already have a doubt about them mixing certain whichcraft on us, it can even be a slow poison - who knows.
That's why I am trying my best to protect my family from them.

 

Hello... I humbly request you to refer to my other posts prior to judge me here.
I can't always link my older posts to the newest threads, nor I can write our ten year old issues in one page to justify myself while seeking advises from you strangers on-line for my current problem.
Since I am one of the active member here, giving advises and suggestions to those who need it in this forum, I urge you to see the problem beyond what is written here. That helps to have some perspective.

I don't have to become old to understand this. I have my own mom, my aunts and others who live separately from their kids and maintain a very beautiful balance. No one cooks for their kids and force feed them on a daily basis after their marriage. That too after they have been moved out of the house and established their own home for a decade.

What nonsense is this to support this kind of mentality, that too in a public forum like this?
Would you be OK to allow your MIL {from another house} to cook and feed your husband on a daily basis, while you have absolutely no chance to cook or feed or at least eat together with him after marriage. That too despite of living separately and doing so much to construct a happy home/family?????
And hear comments from neighbors like "Poor MIL, she had to cook for her married son though he's living separately.. His workaholic wife doesn't care for him or his heath..."

 

What do you mean? Are you seriously missing my post here, or intentionally backing up your original post?

I don't think that you deserve an explanation here. Better you re-visit my older posts and get yourself updated prior to judge me here. There are answers to all your questions.

I have not quoted anything about BM in this thread, yet you talk about this. But I have discussed a lot about my issues with PILs, including how she interfered into our health and hygienic practices and how that affected my kids' health, resulting imbalance in my work/family equation.
Did you purposely ignore that part of my post to highlight something here?
Come on... Do you think that i am that much immature to imagine BM and stuff or keep enmity and hence overacting to this food matter?
Don't you honestly see anything beyond this.... If so, I urge you to stop responding and wasting mine and your valuable time here.

FYI, I am very much matured to overlook MIL's unhygienic old school nature, and our old problems if she is ready to change. I am open to resume our relationship if she is also open and willing to do the same.
However, I am not so naive to fall prey to her drama. I don't believe in BM... Even if there is something, I am sure that I am well protected.
I am faithful in God, and I am seeking God's remedy religiously though.
But I don't want to interact with someone who has bad intentions. I don't want to risk my family {health wise} for someone who doesn't deserve our love.
I am very much grown matured to understand my MIL's bad intentions behind her fake love in this Chapati matter.
Eg: Forcing chapatis daily, even though some days we don't need them. Cursing H for saying NO to her chapatis on special days like birthday as we want to eat out.
Eg: Peeling fruits or cutting them instead of giving kids the whole fruit, because... then only she can peel/cut the damaged part. My kids get the fruits which are half-eaten by the birds, as she proudly shares the better quality ones with her friends...
That's why, despite of our humble and harsh request, she refused to share the whole fruits...

I am here with a decade long experience with this woman. So, I trust my instinct when it warns something.
So, when you respond, please do analyze these matters. Else, you would be wasting everyone's time here

 

Thanks a lot guys for being my support.
I have a lot of updates to tell you guys, but I am really busy now a days to visit here often.

Don't worry that I am in a much better place now to fight or ignore these people, as my H is on my side and we as a family face them courageously on everything. This helps a lot and hence we don't even see their dramas and efforts as problems at all.
For now, they are our biggest entertainment