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New Year Without Mythili (Mithila Kannan)

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by mithila kannan, Dec 31, 2011.

  1. mithila kannan

    mithila kannan Gold IL'ite

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    NEW YEAR WITHOUT MYTHILI [MITHILA KANNAN]
    By S.Lakshiminarayanan

    The beginning of the New Year 2012 is staring at me as for the first time in the last 42 years I will be facing it without Mythili. The impending loss loomed large when she battled for her life and survived by a whisker in Jan 2010. No doubt, life was never the same again but both of us decided and pretended that everything was normal. When her blood circulation weakened as a result of Pulmonary Arterial Thrombosis, she lost the will to survive. When I still held on with my hope for a dramatic recovery she said” I have lost the zest for life and the strength to fight”. Very often she called me, held my hand and profusely apologized for having subjected me to physical and mental strain. I took care of her as a baby and satisfied her every whim. This was my way of repaying the deep debt of gratitude I owed her for being a pillar of support through thick and thin and deftly steering me through official and family imbroglios. The final departure was peaceful and took place inside the lift between second and ground floor. I could not and still cannot believe that she protested against being taken to the hospital while we were in the second floor but had slumped by the time the lift reached the ground floor. The expression on her face was one of triumph that she had her own way at last. Most often in our married life, she had deferred to my judgment and decision but perhaps this was her last chance to show that she had a will of her own and proclaim “enough was enough”

    How is life without Mythili? The flower has withered but the fragrance lingers. I miss the feeble good mornings. I miss serving her freshly brewed filter coffee. Over a period of time I had mastered the art to meet her exacting standards. I miss sharing the highlight of the days’ news and FBs from her fellow Ilites. I miss her blush of discomfort while sharing a bawdy joke. I miss coaxing her to walk to the dining area. I miss giving her the cup of warm milk while retiring for the night.

    She was a simple and uncomplicated person. She would burst into laughter at the slightest provocation. I therefore called her Bubbles and shortened it to Babs. While playing cards i.e. Rummy she would give herself away by laughing when got a natural sequence and jokers. Her imagination ran riot all the time and knowing that I would make fun of her she would always preface her statement with”I may be totally wrong” and blush when I replied” You are absolutely right”. She could weave a story out of a simple anecdote like a silk saree from the mulberry bush. No wonder she had a fan following in Indus Ladies and the forum kindled her intellectual and imaginative best. She did not allow me to even correct the typographical errors.

    Today, as I march on without her serene presence in my life, I am hopeful that I will meet her sometime somewhere. Till then ‘Adieu and wish you a Happy New Year wherever you are Mythili.’
    S.Lakshiminarayanan
     
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  2. iniyamalar

    iniyamalar Gold IL'ite

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    Sir you leave us misty eyed.

    That was so tender and beautiful and straight from the heart.
    I guess she will still be blushing from above, reading this post.

    R.I.P Mithila Madam.
     
  3. mssunitha2001

    mssunitha2001 IL Hall of Fame

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    My dear Uncle

    It is too shocking for me. I just cant believe...I am really not able to sink in this. I have'nt seen Mithila aunty but I do think of her whenever I log into IL. I really wanted to send messages to her but I thought enquiring how her health is now.. would make her more conscious of her health condition. My dad was a person who inspite of being hospitalised for more than a year did not like anybody asking him about his health when it was very obvious that his health condition had worsened.

    I used to love her through her writings...and her smiling photos...I even once requested if she could change her profile photo to a more cheerful/smiling one and she immediately changed it. I was touched by that gesture of hers. From her lively and lovely snippets I understand that she loves/loved you a lot.

    I will be thinking of her more than before now and about you too. I have seen your photos in your family album. Take care sir.

    You had been a very very caring and loving husband and am sure Mithila aunty will be there for you always.
     
  4. sreemanavaneeth

    sreemanavaneeth Gold IL'ite

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    Hello Uncle,

    well coined the words and writeup about Mythili. Very difficult to live without wife A female can live without her husband but a male cannot My Mother passed on 26th Nov 2010 and one year was over and my father feeling more and he is not showing it out from his actions we will be able to sense. Quite difficult to digest the better half departure from Life.I read all her blog and sent my comments also. Could not digest her departure. May your wife be with you in every second
     
  5. Viswamitra

    Viswamitra IL Hall of Fame

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    The flower has withered but the fragrance lingers.What powerful words they are. What a great tribute to someone who made significant difference in your life.

    Every flower that blossoms with so much fragrance that pleases everyone around the flower would eventually become a flower at the Lotus Feet of the Lord of the Universe. I am always a believer that laughter is an expression of cleanliness inside of us. Her admirable qualities inspired you to write such a wonderful tribute. Her memories will carry you for the rest of your life. She is always with you in spirit and will be a champion in helping you lead your life peacefully. She had already planted the seed of peace in your mind and that seed would grow into a big plant in your mind when you pour your love like water into her memories.

    Let God Bless you with peace and let Him provide the gift of immortality to the departed soul.

    May God Bless You.

    With kindest regards

    Viswa
     
  6. InnerBliss

    InnerBliss Gold IL'ite

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    This blog was completely vibrating and challenging to my inner sense and emotions! Whenever, we start something new, we feel as if that thing and all its elements are going to sustain permanently! Least we are aware that everything is a part of this incorporeal world! It has been, maybe, a month now that I have joined IndusLadies. It has been that few days ago only that I had surfed the page of 'Best Blog winners' and had found Mythiliji's blog and had commented my view which was unresponded and I was wondering after few days that why my that comment remained unnoticed. It is now that I have understood the reason.

    I can feel the pain and pride in your writing. There could be no better reward for the departing person than being a 'proudful pain' of the loved ones. You really have done a fantastic job by giving the perfect expression of how you feel. May you able to live your further life in the manner that your loving wife, our lovely IL member, Mythiliji would be proud of. For I am sure that any wife would like her memory to become 'the Strength' and not a 'Weakness' when she does not remain with him anymore.

    May you fulfill all your combined dreams and do always experience the strength that she has left with you being in your thoughts.

    Sorry if you find my words not realistic but surely wish you the best.

    Anuradha
     
  7. varalotti

    varalotti IL Hall of Fame

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    Dearest LN Sir,
    When Vaidehi called me to convey the news the first person to come to my mind was you. The love and the friendship you shared for the last four decades is found only in fairy tales these days.

    I got the news when I was driving home for lunch. On that day at the lunch table I recounted my experiences with the one and only Mithila Kannan. The time when Indhu and I met you guys at your Chennai apartment near MIOT. And the food you served us with your own hand. And your offer to accommodate us should we decide to do the knee replacement surgery for my mil. And the Thi.Janakiraman's book she gifted to me on that day.

    And then your visit to Madurai one evening. I picked you from Pandyan Hotel and we had dinner chatting as if we were childhood friends. And then our visit to your Bangalore Flat in December 2010. The refreshing conversation we all had. And Mithila's gift of a Book on Buddha by Deepak Chopra.

    But what stays me in mind afresh, what I am going to take to my grave and beyond is this. It was late January 2010. I was waiting in a queue at the petrol pump on my two-wheeler. And then got the call from you. That Mythili is in danger. More than the news the tone of your voice affected me very much. I was going for some shopping for my daughter's marriage. I abandoned my trip and went home. Reached the net and posted a prayer thread for Mithila Kannan. Oh My God! That made us realise how much love the lady had gathered in this site! What kind of responses! What prayers! What a love! I was floored, LN Sir.

    I even remember your saying that she should not read the thread lest she would break down unable to bear that kind of love. And she did read and gave her response too. We were all thrilled. She did post a few more blogs. Her writings were herself. Whatever love and authenticity we saw in her as a person we could see in her writings as well.

    Her letters to son, letters to daughter are good enough to be made as part of syllabus in the University of life.
    Very poetic, very sad and very profound, LN Sir. The fragrance that sprang from her writings will linger so long as this world exists.
    When I came to visit her in Bangalore I told her to continue to writing as writing is the real oxygen for her. Now I realise I was wrong. The real oxygen is your love for her. And she was able to survive so many things and withstand so much of pain and troubles because she always had access to the real oxygen, your love.
    May God bless you, Sir. And please do bless us all that we should have at least a fraction of love that was in your and Mithila Kannan's hearts.
    love,
    sridhar
     
  8. rgsrinivasan

    rgsrinivasan IL Hall of Fame

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    That was too touching to read Sir. She had been the best and got the best she deserved - you. Wishing you to have a peaceful and happier life.

    There may come a time when
    I or you may not be around.
    But it won't really matter then,
    We are far too much bound.

    What is death?, I asked you once.
    "If one doesn't exist in thoughts", you said.
    Now I see that your presence
    Is more felt dear!, I say.

    I know you will be just enjoying,
    This hide and seek game dear.
    I too will be glad joining
    And hope that's not far dear.


    Sorry had it been a bit childish Sir. -rgs
     
  9. paanzaa

    paanzaa Gold IL'ite

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    It is a true revelation of a blessed soul. RIP
     
  10. Vanishiv

    Vanishiv New IL'ite

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    Dear Sir,
    Vaidehi sent me this note you wrote and my eyes just welled up. we miss you both a lot. Hope to see you soon. Aunty will be missed and I feel so blessed to have known and interacted with her and am now so glad i know your family so well. You are wonderful people.
    Miss you.
    Vani
     

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