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Discussion in 'Life Without Spouse' started by Barbie2013, Jan 3, 2012.

  1. flowerkumar

    flowerkumar New IL'ite

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    dear friend

    why do u think that he is impotent , maybe he has an affair and he is not disclosing it to u...though if u file a divorce case against him u will be at the stronger end since u have a doubt of him being impotent and he hs actually never tried being close wid u..but the point is to know the reason why is he doing this....try talking to him and tell him that if he does not come up with a valid reason u r not going to leave him to enjoy his life, rather u will make him suffer for all the pain he has given to u , also do tell him that u will be involving his and ur parents in this matter and he will have to explain things to everyone.

    keep ur calm and dont do anything out of anger or frustration...

    take care

    vishu
     
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  2. Barbie2013

    Barbie2013 Silver IL'ite

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    i already involved all the elders but no use
    None of them could change his mind
    He is a kind of stubborn person

    I heard that impotent people will only turn out to be pyschos.

    I m doubting but scared to ask the same

    Also his parents are ok if he goes for love marriage

    so i dont think he has intention to go for another marriage
     
  3. vini31

    vini31 Gold IL'ite

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    hire a pvt detective agency who does the verification for pre n post marriage cases and find out what exactly is the issue, it may cost u a lil but it is worth the effort....by simply harping that he is impotent sorta tarnishes your character... it portraits u as one who married only for physical relation... so be very careful there... marriage is so much more than that .... try n go to a marriage counselor to sort things out ....
     
  4. shruthisp

    shruthisp Gold IL'ite

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    Is he the one asking for divorce or u r guessing u r forced to ask?
    u r saying harasment.. what kind of harassment?
    If he is saying u both are incompatible,What are his answers if u ask him whats his reasons to conclude that? and what is his actions to address that?(may be u both can try to acheive a common ground)
    Without working on the relationship if he simply says he wants to move out juz bcoz he feels u r thin then is both ur parents are ready to take that answer?
    Yes, no one can force him to live with you. But arent they interested in finding out the actual reason and addressing it through counselling to save their son's life?
     
  5. Barbie2013

    Barbie2013 Silver IL'ite

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    he shouts at everyone and he doesnot call his parents as they want us to be together

    he stays away from everyone

    I really dont know whats going to happen
     
  6. blackbeauty84

    blackbeauty84 IL Hall of Fame

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    I think only option remains to you is stand firm. Unless you get a valid reason, don't accept for divorce.
    Are you living with him at the moment? Do you have any place to stay if you come out of the house? If you can support yourself independently come out of the house & support yourself. Tell him unless he communicates, what is the reason you can't accept for divorce or work on the relation. Sometime or later he has to give in.
     
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  7. Barbie2013

    Barbie2013 Silver IL'ite

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    He sent me long back from US
    I am staying alone
    I am working so i m supporting myself financially
    But mentally depressed
    I will implement ur advice
     
  8. ProudIndian

    ProudIndian Gold IL'ite

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    I am very sorry for your situation. Does this man think "marriage" is game or something? If he was not responsible adult then how come his parents marry him? just to spoil innocent girl's life? What is his parents stand? They have to answer you.....

    Did you get any courtship time before marriage and after engagement?

    We indians check, verify, bargain in vegetable markets while buying fruits and vegetables...how come parents don't check boys nature, charecter, habbits while marrying their daughters? Sometimes I feel westerners lifestyles is much better than ours at least they get to live with partner before marriage....Lot of parents work hard, save whole life for daughter's wedding and spend lavishly but they don't enquire about boy?
     
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  9. flowerkumar

    flowerkumar New IL'ite

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    Than u stop saying anything at all , let him frustrate and make a mistake u can raise up and u can also get a clue to what he is upto...u can also hire a pvt detective....but dnt at all show him that u r loosing ur cool and u will agree to his conditions anyway if he treats u like this...
     

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