need to vent....

You are excused!!! and lets not totally generalise or form of a group by saying EVERY DIL.

Yes there are some DILs who dont like to even send a penny even for medical expenses for their inlaws...but we are not talking about that situation.

OPs situation is totally different and if youd ont know the background of her issue or story, better read the past threads and start commenting....no point in fighting over indian vs abroad DILs.

 

Psych
Hope ur son feels better . I am really happy about the treadmill.....yaaay!!!:cheers . Feels like I went shopping !!
You work ur rear ends off ..you need to pamper yourself every once in a while. Don't feel guilty about it.
Now about the fund ..Nice idea about starting off with Neels fund..
and also equal pitching in of ur monthly expenses + emergency fund.(Dont go back on that one)
slowly see how things go and then u can try with 401k plans where there is a penalty for early withdrawal (before retirement). HE will think twice before pulling out from the savings.
All the best !!

 

Dear Psych

I am also in same boat for last 14 years now. I have been working last 18 years in well paid responsible positions. Still I don't have any savings of my own. Here I am working day and night without rest, dropping infant kids to daycare, taking care of cooking, cleaning, laundry, kids activities, homework after everyday officework without any help. I never got proper sleep for many years because of sick kids. Still no apreciation from anybody. My inlaws think we live in u.s. and enjoy all luxuries going to shopping malls etc

My husband sends regular money to parents, siblings for all household exp, medical exp, travelling exp,car etc. My fil and bil spent their income and our saving for sil's luxuries, expensive gifts (gold coins are given to sil, her daughters, husband on every birthday, anniversary, diwali, holi, rakshabandhan etc) so you can imagine what is their expeneses


Plus whenever we goto India we take all expensive gifts (designer perfums, clothes, shoes) for them including my sil's extended joint family (my in laws are extremely proud that their dauther lives in joint family so they want to keep them happy by gifting all the time) We have to sponsor bil and sil's lavish vacations too

Here I am looking for coupens to buy necessary things and cribing for savings whenever wherever i can do

 

as much as i want to say good job.....pls remember dont do things just because you want to show/prove something to your husband....do it because its needed/necessary/valuable/value add...something on those lines...(I know you would keep this in mind..but just reality check

and as JAG said....once in a while its nice to pamper yourself....and buy something nice for yourself..aaah now I feel like doing somethin for myself.....let me figure what i have to do

 

ok..ok...i get it i was just mentioning one point to keep in mind...thats all.. also just let go off this anger maa....you are already working on some of the suggestions n steps right? just let go of this anger about your husband...or his inability to say no....he will also get there...just you be at it..and he will pick it up eventually....do not spoil your health over this.