need to vent....

Yes all of the above
+ emergency fund(not savings) which would include sudden expenses for things like cars repairs,medical co-pays ,etc

All this would be monthly expenses which should be shared down to the last penny since u both earn equally.

He should also share equally the savings for the family which would include things like retirement fund for both ,childrends educational fund and other things u want to save up like a vacation ,property.
This would be the hardest to negotiate.

All that remains with him after he pays his share is his. He can spend on his parents or the guy down the street.
Thats his choice.

 

You could try ...but I have found that making people pay in retrospect is a hard sell .
It could hamper ur success with getting this idea accepted in the first place.
You could start from the beginning of this month saying this is ur new year resolution.

 

Ok for the uncle thing..DH needs to pay you back since it pretty recent and ur DH gave his surity. The idea here psych is ur DH should not be allowed to spend more than he can afford and as long as u are picking up the slack he will continue to do it.

 

Sounds like a good idea!!

Paybacks hardly work between a couple, JAG! Just doesnt work that way..! All, psych can do is start over from now, but cant pull up the past transactions..

 

I hear u SSC...in a normal scenario I never recommend "my " money "your" money but I haev been following pyschs posts and her DH needs a harsh lesson in financial reality.
The down payment which was in the past is diff from the money lent to her DHs uncle. One was for the family and with mutual consent and the other one is not.

 

If financial transactions between psych and her H were already not so good, asking for a payback, will only leave a bitter taste between them, IMO! Yes, it sure is a good idea, to start sharing this year, but payback, I highly doubt.

GL to you psych! Dont beat yourself up. Concentrate on the future.

 

Dont beat urself up ...we have been brought up thinking all money /debt is shared equally between DH and DW.
Its a good idea..if people are being reasonable. When they are not then we need to change .

 

Agree...she can start with NOW...and have a max chance of getting this idea accepted.