Hello op, There is a long discussion of morality and what-not on this forum, but at least from your initial post, I can say that you are not in the wrong for dumping your ex. You were not married, but in a committed relationship, so I assume that you had serious feelings for this man. And with time, you had grown apart and could not find him attractive. You want different things for your lives. This is a legit reason to breakup. If you felt sorry for him and stayed, things will just be as dissatisfying - since your heart is no longer in it. You moved on, but he didn't. In fact, he has taken the breakup so poorly, he's messed up his own life. You are not responsible for that. In fact, you are not responsible for any of his actions. I hope your ex does find closure and moves on. He doesn't seem like a bad sort. I also hope you cut your ties with him, and not unnecessarily encourage him that you will get back together. I haven't read beyond your first post, but make sure that you have a clean break. I wish you the best of luck, in your new relationship. You say that you don't feel guilty, but I think it bothers you that you left a serious relationship, even if you had a legit reason to leave.