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My husband SIL is always irritating me... how to make my husband understand me

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by pavtra, Apr 8, 2015.

  1. pavtra

    pavtra New IL'ite

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    Hello all,
    I am very new to this group.. I had been suffering mentally from attitudes of my husband and his bros wife.. She always calls and talks to him and he sends our photos to her and she keeps messaging her and he tells her where are going.. It is only 1 year since we got married and my his Sil is in another part of US. It is irritating me.. My husband updates everything to her and he doesn't keep any privacy between us..

    I have warned and shouted at my husband for this.. He says if I say I had *** with you last night.then that is privacy the others are not ..
    I am seriously sorry group members I am very much worried and need some solutions either for me or to make my husband understand me..
    Help me I am frustrated..
     
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  2. kanthtx

    kanthtx Gold IL'ite

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    why r u so furstrated.. it seems like he is sharing his good memories with his sis...

    i hope he is not sharing negative details to his sis...

    as long as one shares some info in a positive manner i think thats fine...
     
  3. Laks09

    Laks09 Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Pal - It's his sister-in-law not his sister.
     
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  4. abla

    abla Gold IL'ite

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    Yeah may be OP should call her sister and brother in law and give an update of her husbands day to day activities in detail every day .That would be fun too !!!!
     
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  5. butterflyice

    butterflyice Local Champion Staff Member Platinum IL'ite

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    Welcome to IL!

    How about you mimicking your husband's behaviour?

    You pick up the phone and call your parents/siblings/cousins/friends and talk all about what DH did. Say the same stuff that he shares. It doesnt matter if you are pretending to talk - even if there is no one on the other side;) Do this when DH is not on the phone and he can listen to what you are speaking.

    Hopefully this will annoy him and he will ask you to stop doing it. Then you can say this is exactly how it feels for you.

    If it doesnt work, come back here and you will get more suggestions :)

    .... in bedroom alone is not privacy. Where does this come from, from movies??
     
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  6. butterflyice

    butterflyice Local Champion Staff Member Platinum IL'ite

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    How about your wife sharing all that you do, all that she does with you with her SIL/friend/sibling? The whole day long?
     
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  7. pavtra

    pavtra New IL'ite

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    Thanks for all those ideas.. I have been doing this for a long time.. He is irritated. He starts talking to sister even more..
    Dear members it is his brother's wife..not his sister..
    I am also a sister of 2 elder brothers and have SILs. We all had a good rapo and not like his bhabi..she wants to know Wats happening here and my husband tells her Wat he bought for me he updates even a small pen set that he gifted me to a room heater that he bought for winter..
    I can't understand what's happening between them.. Everytime we both end with fight and a bad name saying I am short tempered person.. His SIL is mother of small girl will she be happy if her daughter has to face the same problem.. She has a brother and a sister.. Why can't she go and talk to them..many days I felt like going back to India.. I left my job parents to stay with him but if he is not true to me how will I be able to lead a happy life.. One year I have being suffered from a lot of things from him.. Earlier it was my MIL who needed to know Wat I personally do and if am pregnant.. Now this Sil
     
  8. pinkRoseBud

    pinkRoseBud Gold IL'ite

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    Confuse them. If he tells her about a heater that he bought, u call her up and tell her story behind how did you select that perticular brand and model. Either she will get confused as why did not your husband tell this to her or she will get annoyed. For every small thing you start doing that. You can even make up some stories If you can handle later be cause she may ask your husband. Either you will have to act innocent and say I was telling my side of story (if it's made up) or you can ignore. Confuse so much that nobody should understand who is telling lie and who is genuine. But convince your husband that you are really innocent.
     
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  9. indubalram

    indubalram IL Hall of Fame

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    I will go with suggestion given by butterfly. That should work. It would satisfy you too plus your husband would think you have your own people to share with.
     
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  10. pavtra

    pavtra New IL'ite

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    OK.. Here I felt I shd tell my husband that he shd include me in all their chats mails or in Wats app..with his brother and me... Made a point that he shd not talk to her without my presence and share photos with my presences.. Then my point is to do Wat he does there.. These 2 don't talk to me directly instead she find out from him wat I am doing..
    I really thank you for ur ideas I really like all ur ideas..will keep them in mind and start irritating them from now on..
     

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