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My first "personal" experience with marital violence

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by kavitha nair 1, Mar 8, 2010.

  1. kavitha nair 1

    kavitha nair 1 New IL'ite

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    My three years of marital bliss changed to martial bliss.

    My husband has hurt me physically.

    For around 3yrs I was having an idyllic life where in I came, I glared, I fought and I won.

    But now he fought back and got physical and it does hurt. I on this special day of international Women sought your help in having this harassment stopped for good.

    I abhor myself that even thou being 10 kgs heavier and few inches shorter than him and I couldn’t protect myself from his ruthless attack.

    The life altering, eye popping incident, for which he refuses to apologize, happened last Friday.

    The whole day I was in frenzy with getting various chores completed, with my lazy husband snoring away.

    I was annoyed with him sleeping while I start with the heavy chore of once in a week washing of 4 tracks,4 t-shirts,10 undergarments and 6 pairs of socks. With these huge heap of clothes in the machine I had to make the special breakfast.Ok, it’s irrelevant here that I make breakfast only on Fridays. I make rava dosa for his gluttonous stomach, 6 in total, 2 for him & 4 for me.

    Its 8.30am and he is still sleeping where as I got up very early one hour back to have duties performed as a wife.

    Once the breakfast is prepared I continue cooking for his lunch.Rice, Dal, Avial. Again irrelevant that leftover Avial only has to be heated. It takes me one cumbersome hour to have all this arranged.

    Its 9.30am and he is still not aware of the agony his wife has been going through. I am a woman, an equal and can’t have it anymore. He has to be accountable for my actions.

    I poke him; shake him grumbling all the time about the miseries of my married life. He musters his voice to beg for half hour more of sleep. How could he even say it? Heartless man.

    Me... Get up and see what all things I did?
    He… other than making my life miserable with no sleep even on weekends.

    Me…sleep all you want but think of me at least once, I am your wife not slave. I washed clothes
    He…maximum 10 /week
    Me….I cooked 2 curries for you
    He…..one leftover
    Me….Breakfast is ready
    He……and you are waiting for me to make the coffee
    Me…Ok making coffee is not such a big job, that’s the only thing you do at home
    He…..Other than vacuuming, going to laundry, throwing garbage, dusting, making bed after you leave without a care in the world each week day for office, folding dried clothes ETC (with capitals)

    Me…oh my god what a person I married? How can you? You consider helping at home and doing these miniscule works as actual toil.oh come on. You know how I spend my day at home?
    He…..yes, watching TV.
    That’s it. I cant take any more truths that too on empty stomach without even a drop of coffee, oh my miserable life .Enough. I keep quiet as I have learnt in these 3 yrs that there is no point in arguing with your husband when he is correct.

    I eye his slumbering body for few more minutes and use the best form of humble submission every Indian wife is born with, pinch his soft upper arm.

    He wakes up with a short cry.

    Yes now he is awake and I can have my coffee.

    Hot coffee and 4 dosas in, I am content and watching my favorite show when I feel an almost inexistent pain on my arm similar to an ant bite.

    I look down to see 2 fingers with a part of my skin in between. I trace the fingers to owners face and find my husband’s content sadistic smiling face much to my shock.Oh,alas as fate would have it I,that day, experienced the first incident of domestic violence. I am shattered. What followed next and the volley of male cries emitted from my house is immaterial here.

    I implore you friends what have I done to deserve this brutal attack. And no amount of intimidation from me is making him apologize.I need your support as I can not mention the attack on me to my mother as she will be devastated and will immediately call him to ask if he doing OK and suggest applying antiseptic cream on his bruises.

    So I have only this forum to seek help.

    Nevertheless there are many Fridays coming ahead and my nails are only getting sharper and sharper.
     
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  2. jananirbk

    jananirbk Senior IL'ite

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  3. shivachoubey

    shivachoubey IL Hall of Fame

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    HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. God I feel sad for your husband. Haahahahaha. You made me laugh. Wonderful writing and a wonderful post. You kept me reading the whole post. Keep writing.
     
  4. knot2share

    knot2share Gold IL'ite

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    Dear Kavitha

    That was a funny post and loved reading it. So nails getting sharper eh??........more to come then! hehehe
     
  5. SriVidya75

    SriVidya75 Platinum IL'ite

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    hehehehe funny one!!! you do have a flair for writing...:) keep blogging
     
  6. Tubelight

    Tubelight Bronze IL'ite

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    Absolutely hilarious ! Bravo !

    The title sort of shook me up, a perfect red herring that did not give the teeny-weeniest inkling about the bomb that followed it !
    :hatsoff
    Looking forward to more from your keys.
     
  7. radhikrish

    radhikrish Silver IL'ite

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    Hi Kavitha,

    That was very hilarious. Very well written blog. You have a flair for humourous writing. Enjoyed reading it.


    Radhi
     
  8. amihere

    amihere Platinum IL'ite

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    Dear Kavitha you really got me.
    It took a while for me to get "My three years of marital bliss changed to MARTIAL bliss."
    While reading the blog I wanted to smile, but kya karu the heading says violence and how can I laugh.
    So finally after knowing how cruel your DH were, I relaxed wentt hrough the blog once more this time
    enjoying and laughing at each line. To tell you the truth everyday when I see my DH curling up beneath the
    blanket and sleeping happily I have to supress my urge to kick him out of the bed and shake him awake.
    The jealous lady in me flames up thinking how can he sleep when I am all awake here:(
    Such a nice write up dear.
     
  9. radsahana

    radsahana Silver IL'ite

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    Hilarious posst, initially i was wondering, where it is leading, but you spinned a good magic, and in the end you bombed us :)
     
  10. Amma15

    Amma15 Gold IL'ite

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    Dear Kavitha,

    Hahahahaha!!That was great. You stumped me. Oh you are really brilliant.

    Love,
    Usha
     

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