Mind Over Matter: The Meditation Club

Discussion in 'Education & Personal Growth' started by Gauri03, Feb 14, 2018.

  1. Viswamitra

    Viswamitra IL Hall of Fame

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    JAG,

    I am with you on the problem encountered by you. After trying to do silent sitting for years and to keep the body erect with aligned Chakra, I gave up and I don't do that anymore. I do practice breath regulation to do targeted set of 4 inhalation/exhalation especially if I have a very agitated mind. That brings my mind to focus on breathing and understand the enormity of it. It helped make my mind understand its interdepence and control its feeling of superiority. Sometimes, namasmarana helps the mind to focus. Learned people say even controlling the body with no motion for a prolonged period of time has its influence on the mind also. Frankly, I have not experienced this but may be I didn't try long enough to experience it.

    Viswa
     
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  2. justanothergirl

    justanothergirl IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear @Srama and @Viswamitra thank you for all the tips. Will surely persevere. I really must learn to calm myself. Today I went for a walk in the rain and I focused on my breathing and strangely for a couple of min I was oblivious to the surroundings- the rain even my walk . Mind was blank. Its not safe I know esp when I am out of home. But it was reassuring that I can get there for a min or so atleast . I need to get that control at home. Thanks for cheering me on.
     
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  3. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    I wanted to try some time of mind-silence, made a mental note of it for some days, but the note didn't turn to action. Didn't want to put it on a written or an app's to-do list. The times during the day such as early morning or late afternoon, before bedtime that are good for meditation/mindfulness, I remembered the intention but didn't act on it. Not looking too deeply into the reasons as I instinctively want the meditation to come naturally, like a puppy or kitten that shows up at the doorstep a few days in a row and ends up adopting you.

    At a given time if life has four or five main must-do's or must-attend-to's, I have often found that dropping one of them results in a calmer and happier me. Like out of "regular job related work, household tasks, me-time, beyond regular parenting, long term career improvement, cooking" -- simply going easy on fulfilling one helps tremendously. The difference is stark -- when family sees me, instead of "fit to be tied" they think "she's so happy, whose birthday is it?" : )

    Some of my friends go to retreats once in a year or so. Not AoL, and sometimes not even a spiritual retreat. No phones, long periods of silence, guided and unguided meditation, and physical activity. Some go as far as Hawaii for such retreats. I have looked at one seriously, but again that decision leap of going just didn't happen.

    Viswa, I've been thinking about the above list and some I and others wrote about -- washing dishes & observing the water, bubbles, being in the process of cooking ... I recalled the times I've done a few of these. One ritual I have (and to my chagrin, my kids now know about it), when at a place that is beautiful and I am seeing for what will be the last time ever or last time in a while, I slowly turn around without blinking to capture the scene like a panoramic picture in a camera. : ) If anyone talks to me during my short, slow, spin, I snap at them, and restart the turn. I then close my eyes and try to recreate and verify the picture that is supposed to be tattooed into memory by then. When I finally open my eyes, the family has completed loading the car and are ready to leave, and say that I was only avoiding the loading work. : ) : )

    OK.. coming to the point, for me, if I were to do this 'stop and smell the roses' as an always everyday habit, it could lose its charm. I would wear a beatific smile, might be a more peaceful and serene, composed person to be around, but I fear I wouldn't be who I am.

    I am not sure what is the point of these observations I've written in this post. Perhaps, I am wondering if there are more who think and feel similarly. Yet, I want to give meditation a more serious try. Maybe starting it when there is no dire need being felt is good? My friends do often tell me, "You think too much." Just do it?
     
    Last edited: Mar 4, 2018
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  4. Shja

    Shja New IL'ite

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    I personally feel vippaasana meditation is scientific way to approach yourself. Does anyone know where around is a good vippasana camp happening with good teachers. I had attended one in igatpuri b4
     
  5. Viswamitra

    Viswamitra IL Hall of Fame

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  6. Viswamitra

    Viswamitra IL Hall of Fame

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    Who are we really? Are we what our mind think who we are? Are we what someone hostile to us thinks or our best friend thinks who we are? A personality whether it is about ourselves or about others is a perception. Why do we have to remain who we are now? What are the forces that makes us be who we are today? Are they our principles and values or legacy of what our mind thought we were in our past? Why are we compelled to be who we are now? Is it because we are the best we could be as of today?

    Smelling the roses is not a responsibility but it is the inherent happiness that mind should pursue, isn't it? No one can completely eliminate emotions but can limit them and become free from imprisonment to our thoughts and feelings. Change is inevitable and whether we tend to do it or not, we will be subjected to change.

    Viswa
     
  7. Viswamitra

    Viswamitra IL Hall of Fame

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    Question

    What triggers our negative emotions quickly? How our mind reacts when someone says something negative about us? What is our emotional reaction to a very toxic and hostile situation? Do we feel afraid or angry at any time? If so how frequently? What we do when we are at the peak of fear or anger? What is our reaction if it is someone close to us and how we react if it is someone not too close to us?

    Here are my experiences:

    1) What triggers my negative emotions quickly?

    When I couldn't find something that belongs to me. I always keep things at the same place where I can find things. If I failed to do so, it hurts me badly. I also form an impression about people who search for things. Mostly, my victims are my wife and son.

    2) How my mind reacts when someone says something negative about us?

    I could bring down the reaction time from around the entire day to less than an hour. Nowadays, it triggers my introspection more than affecting my reaction time.

    3) What is my emotional reaction to a very toxic and hostile situation?

    I worked in a hostile and toxic environment for 9 whole years. I learned how to keep my self pride high and evaluate myself well without listening to the constant criticism from the CEO. This experience changed how I think in a toxic and hostile situation.

    4) Do I feel afraid or angry at any time? How frequently?

    Both fear and anger played a major role when I was young and to a certain extent a major impediment in my character development. After I realized that those emotions are direct results of desires and attachments, I began to work towards ceiling on desires and attachments. Emotional assets such as my spouse or son are still a trigger point if someone makes negative comments about them and I am working to overcome. Even though I have not eliminated it completely, the frequency has come down drastically.

    5) What do I do when I am at the peak of fear or anger?

    I fast and don't eat at all until I overcome fear or anger. I am not sure what triggers fasting.

    6) What is our reaction if it is someone close to us and how we react if it is someone not too close to us?

    When I was young, the reaction to people close to me was favorable and those who are not too close was unfavorable. This is reversed now at the old age and I react much stronger to those who matters most in my life and those who doesn't matter, my reaction is much less.

    I am eager to listen to others and learn from their comments.

    Viswa
     
  8. Viswamitra

    Viswamitra IL Hall of Fame

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    I have corrected the above sentence in my next post as the original sentence doesn't read right.

    Viswa
     
  9. jskls

    jskls IL Hall of Fame

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    compromising on discipline and perfection triggers it. Learning slowly to accept and let go

    I say to myself “That’s how much they know me”. No use in pondering over it.

    earlier I used to get too upset but these days I do not give room to that. Either I put my foot down and stand up for myself or I simply walk away. Of course for sometime it will be lingering in thoughts but I go for a brisk walk even in cold weather to shake it all off.

    same as question 1. Fear Never. Not angry but get a bit upset like this morning when I had to brake suddenly on a curvy slopy icy road with huge truck on the opposite side because of a careless driver ahead. I introspected why I got upset, realized because my lunch bag toppled upside down and fell ... silly me so was able to overcome that feeling within minutes

    If it was my kids they get an earful if others I don’t say a word.
    no disparity. In my kids language it’s the same difference.

    I don’t even know if my answers made any sense but felt good sharing
     
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  10. Viswamitra

    Viswamitra IL Hall of Fame

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    The question to ponder. We believe the animals have no discrimination faculty as the humans do. Because of this discrimination power, we understand that we need to have unconditional love for all beings in the world. However, the pet animals we raise don't have that discrimination. However, they always demonstrate unconditional love for everyone including those who discipline or express anger or even pay no attention when they express their love. How do they obtain the skill to love everyone unconditionally?

    Viswa
     

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