Men's Rules

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by g3sudha, Jan 31, 2012.

  1. g3sudha

    g3sudha IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    7,986
    Likes Received:
    8,287
    Trophy Points:
    445
    Gender:
    Female
    At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down
    Finally, the guys' side of the story.

    We always hear 'the rules' From the female side
    Now here are the rules from the male side.

    These are our rules!
    Please note.. these are all numbered '1 ' ON PURPOSE!
    1. Men are NOT mind readers

    1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
    You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
    We need it up, you need it down.
    You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

    1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
    Let it be.

    1. Crying is blackmail.

    1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:
    Subtle hints do not work!
    Strong hints do not work!
    Obvious hints do not work!
    Just say it!

    1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

    1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

    1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
    In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

    1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

    1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

    1. You can either ask us to do something
    or tell us how you want it done. Not both.
    If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

    1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

    1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

    1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
    Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

    1. If it itches, it will be scratched.. We do that.

    1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

    1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

    1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really.

    1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as hunting, fishing, golfing, or something with wheels.

    1. You have enough clothes.

    1. You have too many shoes.

    1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

    1. Thank you for reading this.
    Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight.

    But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping. —
     
    10 people like this.
    Loading...

  2. Aspire

    Aspire Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    941
    Likes Received:
    512
    Trophy Points:
    195
    Gender:
    Male
    Ha ha ha...good one! :)
     
  3. justanothergirl

    justanothergirl IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    3,892
    Likes Received:
    7,036
    Trophy Points:
    408
    Gender:
    Female
    :rotflHahahaha!
    Enjoyed it thoroughly...!
     
  4. mums

    mums Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    2,217
    Likes Received:
    4,373
    Trophy Points:
    290
    Gender:
    Female
    1. If it itches, it will be scratched.. We do that

    1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as hunting, fishing, golfing, or something with wheels.

    1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

    1. Thank you for reading this.
    Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight.

    But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping. —[/QUOTE]



    :):thumbsup:rotfl:rotfl:bowdown:bowdown
     
  5. nnarmadha

    nnarmadha Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    2,476
    Likes Received:
    1,868
    Trophy Points:
    283
    Gender:
    Female
    Well said one....
     
  6. rosy786

    rosy786 IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    4,474
    Likes Received:
    3,026
    Trophy Points:
    308
    Gender:
    Female
    Hahahaha..LOved it especially last one
     
  7. aparnag

    aparnag Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    2,917
    Likes Received:
    523
    Trophy Points:
    233
    Gender:
    Female
    Hahahaha hahahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahahahahahahhaha...
    wonderfully said!!!
     
  8. lathaviswa

    lathaviswa IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    5,450
    Likes Received:
    2,000
    Trophy Points:
    340
    Gender:
    Female
    Excellent ..........
     
  9. malarun

    malarun Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    373
    Likes Received:
    359
    Trophy Points:
    123
    Gender:
    Female
    Hi Sudha,

    OMG!!!! When I was reading this I thought my husband wrote it... he he he...:rotfl.. He is the ditto same...

    A good composition of things...:bowdown

    Thanks
    Malar
     
    1 person likes this.
  10. Neha1911

    Neha1911 Senior IL'ite

    Messages:
    18
    Likes Received:
    13
    Trophy Points:
    18
    Gender:
    Female
    We laugh about it, but this is exactly how men think.
     

Share This Page