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Loveless, sexless marriages and EMA

Discussion in 'Intimacy' started by MaritalBliss, Feb 5, 2013.

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  1. Feb 6, 2013 #31
    steve

    steve Platinum IL'ite

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    Legislatures have the power to legislate anywhere. But Indian parliament has made it too easy for itself to amend the constitution. In the USA, a constitutional amendment is a herculean task.
     
    steve, Feb 6, 2013
    steve, Feb 6, 2013
    #31
  2. Feb 6, 2013 #32
    fencesitter

    fencesitter Platinum IL'ite

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    In India, its all about majority. Our democracy is all about majority. we can not compare Indian democracy with US. Even after vote counting, we do not know who will lead us for the next 5 years!
     
    fencesitter, Feb 6, 2013
    fencesitter, Feb 6, 2013
    #32
    1 person likes this.
  3. Feb 6, 2013 #33
    justanothergirl

    justanothergirl IL Hall of Fame

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    This is the oldest and the lamest excuse for an EMA.

    What prevents people from divorcing and living in the same house as room-mates...and continue to date outside (If raising young children and the logistics of time sharing is the main concern. )
    Why the charade ? Why the cheating?

    EMA is act of selfishness ...an acute one. If children's best interests were at heart..one would rise above it.
     
    justanothergirl, Feb 6, 2013
    justanothergirl, Feb 6, 2013
    #33
    4 people like this.
  4. Feb 6, 2013 #34
    Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    JAG, just answering this part of your post. There could be lot of reasons for people to not divorce. One spouse having a medical condition and other spouse's job provides a good insurance is one possible reason. Often the spouse with the medical condition would have helped healthy spouse progress in career & education in happier times. Or, they might own a house hopelessly under water, divorce would need that to be sold or one partner buy out the other's share, and they don't want or can't do that. Or a divorce might require retirement accounts to be cashed resulting in early withdrawal penalties.

    Sometimes the "rightness" of waiting till marriage is formally over before looking outside for sex/love is not worth it to the persons in the marriage. Faced with a broken marriage, the satisfaction of sticking to some principles might be the last thing they seek.

    I am not condoning it per se, but saying that it happens. And who would outsiders be to judge!
     
    Rihana, Feb 6, 2013
    Rihana, Feb 6, 2013
    #34
    2 people like this.
  5. Feb 6, 2013 #35
    steve

    steve Platinum IL'ite

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    ​
    Made me think of "War of the Roses" immediately.

    [video=youtube;6Y-mx0gcJdg]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Y-mx0gcJdg[/video]​
     
    steve, Feb 6, 2013
    steve, Feb 6, 2013
    #35
  6. Feb 6, 2013 #36
    justanothergirl

    justanothergirl IL Hall of Fame

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    EMA by the very definition (unless we go into the realm of Nandita & Co) implies behind spouses back.

    If we are talking about open marriages then I am out of my depth and shall gracefully retire from this thread.Bow

    All ur above reasons are valid ...not to get a divorce in paper paying a large amount of fees to lawyers. They dont hold water when the issue is not about the technicality of the divorce as much as it is about agreeing to separate in principle with ur current spouse BEFORE dating outside.

    Can this work yes...my colleague is in a situation like this. European married to an Asian. Young kids. Separated but not divorced. They live in the same house. House under water. Cannot sell .They date outside with each others knowledge.

    Monogamy is a crucial point in most marriage systems across the world that I am aware of . If my spouse were to change the rules of the institution in the middle of the game then I think I am entitled to know before it happens not after.

    The cheating spouse cannot play GOD and decide the kind of marriage the other one is in.
     
    justanothergirl, Feb 6, 2013
    justanothergirl, Feb 6, 2013
    #36
    4 people like this.
  7. Feb 6, 2013 #37
    Pranjjal

    Pranjjal Gold IL'ite

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    I think One comes to know after marriage how there partner is not before?
     
    Pranjjal, Feb 6, 2013
    Pranjjal, Feb 6, 2013
    #37
  8. Feb 6, 2013 #38
    justanothergirl

    justanothergirl IL Hall of Fame

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    Thats why there are exit strategies.
     
    justanothergirl, Feb 6, 2013
    justanothergirl, Feb 6, 2013
    #38
  9. Feb 6, 2013 #39
    chocogal26

    chocogal26 Platinum IL'ite

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    EMA stands for????
     
    chocogal26, Feb 6, 2013
    chocogal26, Feb 6, 2013
    #39
  10. Feb 6, 2013 #40
    Pranjjal

    Pranjjal Gold IL'ite

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    Pranjjal, Feb 6, 2013
    Pranjjal, Feb 6, 2013
    #40
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