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Love Letter - Needs your reply! - CONTEST

Discussion in 'Varalotti Rengasamy's Short & Serial Stories' started by Induslady, Sep 29, 2005.

  1. Induslady

    Induslady Administrator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Love Letter - Needs your reply!

    Love Letter

    A Short Story By Varalotti Rengasamy

    Chennai

    20/08/2001

    My Dear Vasu,

    I love to start this letter with the hackneyed words “I am fine and hope to hear the same from you.” But I am not fine, Vasu, and I do not want to begin this letter with a lie.

    Nor I am inclined to romantically begin this letter saying “My sweet kisses to you, Darling”. If you are going to look for, in this epistle, the outpourings of love and passion of a love-lorn wife living thousands of miles away you will be disappointed.

    Do not casually skim through this letter in your lunch interval. I am pretty earnest and the matter is quite serious. One final note of caution: if you have anything important to do in your office or elsewhere, better finish it first and then read this. For I don’t think you will be able to do any thing worthwhile for a few hours after reading this. Okay?

    My dear husband, I know nothing but the truth and I speak or write nothing but the truth. My aim is not to please you through this letter; my aim is just to tell the truth, the plain and the simple truth. And as we are all painfully aware truth is not pleasing or comforting most of the time.

    I should confess that your entry into my life marked the onset of Spring in my otherwise dull and colourless life. I was a bud and you only made me bloom into a beautiful flower. I fell in love with you at the first glance. And it was a classic love at first sight. Of course our first meeting did not take place in romantic circumstances; it was not under the moonlight,on the beach, not even in the semi-darkness of a five star restaurant. But the ambience is not a necessary condition to fall in love. You met me as a part of the traditional ‘girl-seeing’ function of the South. You honoured and broke the tradition at the same time. You came for the traditional ‘girl-seeing’; but you did not come as a part of a huge crowd as other suitors did. You came alone. There is an
    elegance in a groom coming all by himself to see the girl. When you looked at me straight in the eyes I fell for you then and there. I had then the traditional mentality of a woman of an orthodox background. I wanted to be your slave all my life. And there was some sweetness in that slavery. Feminists might find it difficult to forgive me.

    You were the eleventh suitor. The ten boys who came before you came with a crowd which they called ‘family’, ate to the full, made me sing and bow to them and finally broke up the relationship as my father could not meet any of their dowry demands. It is strange that in this country most of the boys plan their career through their marriage.

    Some wanted money from my father to start business; and some wanted my father to furnish their home or buy them vehicles or household gadgets. “All for your daughter, Sir” they shamelessly begged. My father had retired as a school teacher and had accumulated friendship and goodwill but not money. So there was no question of conceding to their demands. Those heartless guys made fun of father’s poverty and rejected me as if it were a righteous act. I used to laugh and mock at every groom, while my father used to shed tears at his inability to marry me off.

    And then,dear, you came along. Your voice was majestic when you said without hesitation, “I like the girl; if she also likes me, then we can talk further.”

    My father who had all along been used to brutal rejections could not bring himself to believe your words. So he hesitantly murmurred,”About the dowry, other demands….”

    You did not allow my father to finish the statement. “Whatever you want to give to your daughter whether it is jewels or cash or any other asset, it is okay with me. Left to me I will have her as she is. No jewels, no dowry and no demands. And I want a simple marriage. I don’t want to see you burdened with debts because of our marriage.”

    Had we been alone at that time, my dear, I would have washed your feet with my tears.

    It was only after that momentous occasion that I came to know about you and your life. When I learnt that you were employed in the Gulf and were making good money I was even more thrilled. I started dreaming of our life abroad; I had even dreamt of how to decorate our bed room and what special delicacies I will cook for you on Sundays.

    I was in for the rudest shock of my life when you started packing up for your trip to the Gulf without me, just thirty days after the marriage. I could not simply bear to see you go without me. I was wild with anger and frustration and refused to talk to anybody including my father. I lost my temper at the mildest provocation and started shouting at everybody.

    But unlike me you were very gentle and understanding. The night before you left you did not sleep at all. You talked to me the whole night. With soft words and your persuasive powers you convinced me that some sacrifice is necessary to lay down the foundation for a happy and prosperous life. You told me that many stories end with the words “lived happily everafter”; but invariably this line will be preceded by a lot of hardships and sacrifices. And we are going through that phase in our lives and the happy ending is sure to follow. And when we are re-united amidst plenty and prosperity we won’t even remember this temporary separation. You had a very clear plan in your mind. Within two years you will return with a lot of savings. We shall then build a big house here in Chennai and start living a hassle-free life with all our economic needs taken care of by your accumulated savings.

    I was amazed at your foresight and agreed to your going alone. Of course I was terribly sad; but I buried my sadness deep within so that you would not be disturbed by my grief. I saw you off with a forced smile on my lips and the unrestrainable tears in my eyes. But that was life, I consoled myself and started counting the days to your arrival from then on. It was precisely seven hundred and thirty days, that is two years.

    You will never know or can even imagine how I spent that two years without you. I started hating everything around me. I did not want to do any thing. I had dreamt of cooking for you with my own hands every day after the marriage. But after you left I could not even enter the kitchen.

    Continued...in the next message
     
    Last edited: Nov 29, 2005
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  2. Induslady

    Induslady Administrator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Love Letter - Part II

    Your people – your parents and your sister – were quite nice and they perfectly understood my condition. But I do not want to hide the truth from you; it was irritating for me to see my in-laws day in and day out when you were not around.

    I had to wait eight years for my marriage thanks to the dowry demands and my father’s inability to meet them. But these two years after the marriage were far worse compared to those eight. To starve without any food is one thing; but after such a starvation to have the first gulp of food and to be denied the second is much more cruel. That was my condition.

    But my suffering, my patience was amply rewarded when you returned from Gulf exactly after two years as you promised. Oh, I will never forget that day in my life. When we were left alone we were just sitting, staring at each other for God knows how long. Do you remember that? Well, those were the sweetest moments of my life. When you gently touched my chin, lifted my face to kiss me, I could not bear that any more and started hugging and kissing you violently.

    I was tagging along with you wherever you went unmindful of being teased by your people.

    When I was about to tell you that hereafter we should never be apart even for a short time, you crushed my heart and my feelings with your future plans. You had the nerve to tell me that you have to be away from me for another three years in order to save a few lakhs more just to ensure a much happier life for both of us after that. You said that these extra three years of work is necessary to have a larger house, a bigger car and hence a happier life.

    I was shaken to the roots of my being. Honestly I could not buy that pep talk of yours any longer. I cried to you shamelessly – ‘I don’t want a large house but I want a home with you wherever you are. I don’t want a car or a TV I want only you, my dearest.’ But you chose to remain deaf to these words. You made perfunctory efforts to convince me and when you failed in your attempts you left for the Gulf not even bothering to take leave of me. The one month we were together flew like a second. Once you left every second seemed to drag on and on.

    Apart from loneliness and boredom which inevitably accompanies it there are certain other problems as well. I strongly hope that your heart will have the strength to bear the force of truth. It is only on that hope that I am opening up my mind and revealing the most personal part of me for you to see.

    When you went abroad immediately after the marriage my mind was filled with hopes and dreams. I was convinced that by that sacrifice we are paving the way for a happier and a plentiful life. And after all it was just two years – or just seven hundred and thirty days. But when you said another three-year-separation was necessary to make our future life even more plentiful, all my hopes were crushed. Now my heart is full of uncertainty and pessimism. Who knows, after three years it may be just another two years so that we can have two houses or three cars or a few more lakhs of savings. You will have your own line of reasoning and I will be only talked to or talked at and not consulted before you take those heart-rending decisions.

    I am known to be frank and my friends often complain I am brutally so. Yes, I am. Now listen. I am a woman and I have my needs and desires. You know what I mean. Yes, my dear husband, that is a basic need and the whole institution of marriage is founded upon that.

    As long as there is a hope of fulfillment of those needs I can fight with my feelings and keep them under check. But when that hope fades I am afraid that one of these days I might lose the battle I am waging with my twenty-eight-year old body.

    You are my husband and we are lawfully wedded; even then I feel a little hesitant to tell you this: I have started craving for physical intimacy.

    If a man stares at me when I walk down the street I now stare back at him. As I idly turn the pages of magazines I stop to look at the intimate pictures of actors and actresses. Even the slightest hint of intimacy turns me on and I virtually stare at the picture for a long time. Do not for a moment think that I am a nympho; that is a convenient label used by men when they do not want to face uncomfortable questions from a woman.

    I am just a normal woman having normal emotions, normal needs and normal desires. But when these normal urges are frustrated then they encroach on the whole mind and the woman cannot think of any thing else. That is a natural consequence of frustration of sexual desires. When you are fed at proper intervals you do not even think of food. But when you are deprived of food then all your thoughts will be focusing only on food. That is a fundamental fact.

    In spite of my ongoing battle with my body and its urges I was practicing restraint and did not allow my emotions to go beyond bounds. I had even hoped to wage such a battle continuously for the three-year period and surrender completely to you when you return.

    But three events happened, all in a week’s time, and my resolve is shaken to the roots. These events made me realize that how weak I am in relation to my bodily urges and instilled in me the fear that I might eventually lose the battle even before you come.

    Last Monday a thief had entered into our house. He had scaled the compound wall and using the drainage pipe he climbed up to our room. As usual I was rolling in the bed unable to sleep. Alerted by the noise I boldly stood up and shouted “Who is it?”. I did not know that he had already entered our room. He sprang upon me and closed my mouth with his strong hands. I was struggling hard for release. He tightened his grip over me. Within a few minutes neighbors came running up the stairs and sensing trouble the thief left me and ran away.

    This is a pretty ordinary incident. But in retrospect when I found how my mind worked during those difficult moments I was shocked beyond words. Instead of feeling relief that I had escaped unhurt from the thief I was longing for those strong hands and to hold my mouth for a little longer. Inwardly I preferred that masculine presence to a dull safety.

    These thoughts loaded my mind with guilt and I could not sleep any longer. I was up by five’o clock the next morning and went down for my coffee. The door of your father’s room was slightly ajar and I could see your father and our house-maid in a compromising position. I ran back to our room shivering at the scene. Then only its impact hit me.


    Continued...in the next message
     
    Last edited: Sep 29, 2005
  3. Induslady

    Induslady Administrator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Love Letter - Part III

    After thirty years of unbroken marital life and after six children your father at his fifty-sixth age could not bear your mother’s absence for a week and was seeking carnal pleasures from the ordinary looking house-maid! That perspective emboldened me and justified my feelings and needs.


    You know about our neighbor across the street. Both the husband and the wife are bank employees. They do not have any children. The husband was promoted and posted at <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:eek:ffice:smarttags" /><st1:City w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Delhi</st1:place></st1:City>. The wife did not want to quit her lucrative bank job. She is trying for the so called ‘spouse-joining transfer’. I used to see her once in a while. The longing for her husband is clearly written on her face. She used to tell with a deep sigh that she might have to wait for another year to join her husband at <st1:City w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Delhi</st1:place></st1:City>. Meanwhile I heard a shocking news about her – she has developed an affair with a street-hawker; the whole street is talking about it.

    From one angle it is just a juicy scandal; but from another, I see that between me and her the difference is only that of degree. That’s all. Which means, I might also go astray given the time and the circumstances.

    But a part of my mind assures me that I will never do that. I am confident that I will not stoop to that level. But neither can I withstand this torture for an infinite period of time.

    So please listen to me. I can wait for another three months at the maximum. I beg and pray of you to end my punishment before that period. Find out a family accommodation there and take me; or resign your job and come here. If you can’t do either of that at least release me from the bond of marriage. That way even if something happens that will not scandalize our relationship and the very institution of marriage.

    If you choose to do neither then you will be making me a slave to the circumstances and that will be the harshest punishment.


    Yours sincerely,
    S.Vidya
    -----------------------------------------------------------------

    Go ahead and post your reply to this letter in this thread...
     
  4. Lakshmivinoth

    Lakshmivinoth Junior IL'ite

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    Sridhar,

    I read this letter from A-Z. To be very honest, this letter has put me into emotional swings. I couldn’t help crying. It could be easy for some one to say, “Its just a story just forget it”. But if you relate or compare this story to your own life, you cannot help crying.



    As you said, every woman will relate herself someway or the other to Vidhya. In my case, my parents got lot of aliances but again each one of them was joker and I doubted if they even know the value of the marriage that bonds a strong relationship between two families. I was very upset in my life till I met Vinoth (My husband) who is employed in Gulf (<?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:eek:ffice:smarttags" /><st1:City><st1:place>Dubai</st1:place></st1:City>). He is no way near Vasu’s character. Vinoth and his family have always showered their love on me. His parents were never blessed with a daughter and hence I have got all the respect that a daughter of a family deserves. When my marriage got fixed with Vinoth, he and his family members were particular that I must live with Vinoth only. They all were so understanding and kind regarding this. Today, I am happily married for the last 3 years and I am also blessed with a good job. I was never ever separated from my husband for the last 3 years. But I know that there are so many woman whose spouse work in Gulf and they get to see each other once in 2-3 years. I really feel sad for them. If I get an opportunity to speak with Vasu, I would clearly communicate to him that what he is doing is just not fair on himself and on vidhya. He is focusing mainly on the money aspect. He has no trust on Vidhya but only on money. I would give him an example of myself and vinoth that how happily we live in <st1:City><st1:place>Dubai</st1:place></st1:City>. We too had too many financial problems initially. Every couple go thro this phase during the initial stages. But for that reason, you cannot neglect the other aspects of life like love, affection, relationship, friendship etc…If you give importance to love and relationship, give respect to your wife, take her suggestion what can be done. Regarding money, its not a problem at all. Vidhya can still live with Vasu. I assume that Vidhya is a educated woman and hence Vasu can try his level best to find a suitable job for Vidhya. I am talking out with my own experience. When I got married to Vinoth and moved to Gulf, Vinoth never forced me to look out/not to look out for a job. He left the choice to me. But I understood the fact that dual income is a must. Moreover, I am also career oriented woman. Today, our dual income is taking care of all the cost and savings spects of life. Given an opportunity, Vidhya can also prove herself in her career and take some responsibilities towards the financial contribution of the family too. Vasu should have thought it in this way, atleast after spending 2 years of lonely life without Vidhya. Its never too late. He must react positively towards Vidhya’s letter. Otherwise, he doesn’t deserve a wife like Vidhya.



    I want to write too many things. But it will become boring. Let me see what others have to say.



    Regards



    Lakshmi Vinoth
     
  5. varalotti

    varalotti Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Thanks For The Emotionally Charged Reply!

    You have read the story with complete emotional involvement and that shows in your reply.
    In case you have not seen the contest section, they have announced a contest regarding story.
    Now you have advised Vasu. You will have to take a full swing and now draft a reply to Vidhya. That's the competition. Why don't you take part in it?
    Wishing you best of luck,
    sridhar
     
  6. Lakshmivinoth

    Lakshmivinoth Junior IL'ite

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    Dear Sridhar

    I have gone thro the contest details. I will definetly prepare a letter written from Vasu. Whatever said and done, I will look at it from a female point of view. Hence, I will take the opinion of my husband as well.

    Regards

    Lakshmi
     
  7. swku_2000

    swku_2000 New IL'ite

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    I Love You!

    Dear Vidya,

    I LOVE YOU!

    I was speechless after reading your letter. My mind stopped working and tears rolled down my eyes..
    I have read it 10 times and each time I cry!

    I am very happy that you opened out to me. Or else I would have continued to do the crime without realizing its impact on you.

    Vidya, my dear wife, I know you are sad but I never realized you are suffering.
    I am also having a hard life, going to office, coming back.. only work work n work..
    But you know I am not slaving out for myself, it is for both of us..
    You have a family with you but I am all alone. I have no one to stand by me.
    Last monday, I had fallen sick, I had high feever and I did not have the strength to cook food or take medicene. I was lying in the bed helplessly for 10 hours.. when one of my friends called up I told him about my condition and he came and gave me medicenes and food. I could have even died like that. But I never said anything to you or my parents as it would have made them sad.

    Vidya, I am not happy here..
    I know it is wrong on my part to keep you separated from me for so long.. but you know I have to tell you something, which my parents didnt want me to tell you.
    My dad is under debt so I need to earn to fullfill the loans and after that I want to earn for our house and car and other savings.. so it is a long-term affair.

    I know every girl dreams of a big and beautiful house, a husband who is like a king and who has a beautiful car and lots of servants. I want to give you all the comforts which you deserve. I never want to make you sad.

    In 2 years of being away from you I have collected enough for the debts but nothing for us..

    But ...

    I dont want you to be suffering.. Vidya I love you a lot and I need you by my side.
    Oh, I cant tell you how much I miss you, your beautiful body.. those deep loving eyes, those soft warm hands..

    Now, I have a taken a decision, for your sake and for my sake..

    I am coming back..
    But with no money. I realized that you need me the most right now and so I will take a house on rent and work and we will buy a house on loan..

    I am very happy that you opened my heart to me.. I feel guilty for my actions..
    I am sorry, I hope you forgive me and I promise that you will never have to complain again.

    Vidya, I need you physically as much as you need me. I can understand your sexual urges, as I go through the same. I want you to join a library and do a lot of reading and I remember you sang so well. You can take singing classes at home. I want you to be busy till I come back. It will take around 3-4 months to settle down things here.. after which I promise I will be back..

    Yours n only yours,
    Vasu.
     
  8. Sharada

    Sharada Senior IL'ite

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    happens all the time

    Very moving letter. There are many (esp. in Kerala) Gulf widows. When the husband is away for long stretches of time it can be very lonely and depressing - no one else and no activity can fill that void.
    Of course I'll be entering the contest. I wrote in just to tell Varalotti that this love letter really pulls the heartstrings.
    Sharada
     
  9. varalotti

    varalotti Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Thanks, Sharada

    Thanks a lot, Sharada. It's very thoughtful of you to have sent an appreciative mail.
    Best of luck in the contest.
    regards,
    sridhar
     
  10. nanda

    nanda New IL'ite

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    Kisna

    Dear Vidya,

    I could not believe that my love is in so much pain because of me.If words are enough to explain then please understand dear that I am really very sorry for having given you this pain.Please Vidya you also read this letter very calmly and understand what I intend to say.

    Sweatheart life is not easy for everybody.Some have the courage to face it and some don't.But I know that my Vidya is strong as she is the strength behind me. In these years whenever I was down you hold me up and you know how ?I will tell you today. I am here all alone with only thoughts of you and our family.The only plus point which I have here is that I can earn good money here form my job. From this money I can have any pleasure I want over here. I too have the same wishes and desires as you have but you know what I do at such times. I hold my hands tightly as if I am holding you, I close my eyes so as to see nothing else then you and my heartbeats tell me .."Vasu I am here , in your heart,in your blood, in every breath that you take , then why do you miss me. I am you and you are me then why this distance between us. We are one soul ,one heart..." And believe me Vidya I feel as if I am recharged, ready to take any challenge of life. I totally agree that you also may have tried in such ways to move ahead these days but you are a little tried now. Don't think that you will lose this battle and will be a loser. No, my sweatheart will never take any wrong step and will go astray as before you take that step my heart will tell you " I am here sweatheart, where are you going and will never allow you to go anywhere."
    Vidya one more thing I will like to make you understand that I am here only to earn money and money has its importance . I totally agree that if I come back you will be ready to live with me in any condition , with no luxuries of life but have you ever thought beyond that. Once we are together, our family will grow. I am talking about our children.Without enough finance just think what future will we give them. Can you see me in the same situation once your father was. Depressed and helpless. No, Vidya you will not be able to see me like that. But I will not allow you also to suffer now and more even if it is for our future, our children and our life.And so only I have to take some decission.My first decission is to bring you here even if it is on a visit visa and I will try my best to get it even if it means I have spend some money. But right now my Vidya needs me more then anything else in life. So be assured that I will never leave you alone to go astray. And secondlly once you are here we will think what to do next. Either we will try for a job for you or we will try for family visa or any thing which will not take my Vidya far from me.
    Trust me sweatheart, I am with you in your all pains and suffering the same over here but hoping the best for us and our life, our future. MY reply will not make you completely normal but I know that you will definately try to understand the situtation and give me a little time till I bring you here .Till then lots of luv.

    Yours forever,
    Vasu
     

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