Kids are NOT Demonstration pieces!!!

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Here goes my MOST favorite saying:

Before you were conceived I wanted you
Before you were born I loved you
Before you were here an hour I would die for you
This is the miracle of life.
-by Maureen Hawki

Rate of learning in kids differ:
The first five years in a child’s life is said to be a great learning curve where the child acquires adequate knowledge about life in the form of learning skills ,emotional and social bonding. During this period, kids tend to grasp things at a faster rate as per study. For most of them these qualities diminishes as years pass by in the process of growing into an adult. It is during this wonderful period that kids start imitating others and at the same time try to cultivate their own qualities. The quality that a child imbibes is her own and this is what defines her personality on the whole.
Every child possesses their own skill set. They tend to lag in some areas and they tend to gain expertise in some other areas. In the process of growing up, kids bound to learn the things they are lagging in to transform themselves into a complete adult.
Let me quote it with an example :

When it comes to achieving milestones, some kids tend to achieve it at a quicker rate while some kids may achieve it at the slower rate. But on the whole they are sure to learn these things( be it either rolling over, crawling, standing up on her own , developing teeth, vocabulary and speech etc ) in the process of growing up and master their skills in these areas. Few kids even tend to skip few milestones in the process. No two kids are identical. To put it in simple terms : This is the thumb rule of nature.

Parents “NO COMPARISON PLEASE":
When once we parents get to understand this formula that nature poses on us, most of the problem is solved. It is only when we fail to understand, it leads to a most complicated and dangerous term called COMPARISON. Comparison between two children in the same age group is bound to happen at different phases. But what we as parents need to understand are there are certain distinct and unique qualities which every child possess. We as parents are responsible in identifying these qualities of the child and mold them in a proper way. What kids need from us and moreover teach us at this stage is “ENCOURAGEMENT and LOTS OF PATIENCE.”
Here’s an example again from my personal life which explains the same.

My son is quick in doing things in the sense if he observes anything once, he is able to do it on his own the next time. This is the point where he leads in his learning phase. On the other hand, he lags in vocabulary. He speaks in bits and pieces but is not able to speak as a sentence. I ,as a mother was worried before but slowing got into terms with the rule of nature. I know he will sooner or later be able to speak continuously and there is no doubt on that part. Till then what I as a parent require is PATIENCE!! I also at the same time ENCOURAGE my son in whatever he speaks. By this way, I tend to not push things on him but to be a perfect listener to what he speaks and at the same time encourage him to speak a word or two in between the conversation.

The other day myself and my husband along with my son had been to one of the relatives house. She has a granddaughter who is in the same age group as my son (in fact two months older than my son to be more precise).As soon as we entered, aunty asked “ Enna paiyyan pesaraana?(Is your son speaking?)”. We said”Not yet completely, he speaks in bits and pieces and not as a sentence”.
Soon she started pestering her granddaughter to recite rhymes, slokas,ABCs and what not!!But the girl was quite all through the while we stayed there as we were new faces to her.( and I admit that happens to my son too when he comes across any new faces).Moreover she was not well and was coughing continuously but that did not stop them to pressing the child to speak. She finally recited few things and was staring at us with her curious eyes. I actually felt sorry for her and like running away from there but since my son started playing with the little girl casually, I was happy to see this welcome change in him. This is because he usually takes time to mingle with people, but here to our surprise once he was there at the relatives’ house he started screaming and playing with that kid.

They were like all praises for their little child like she does this and does that. We also had to relent to these praises by doing a bit for our son finally, with my husband immediately pointing out “Actually you know what , ‘A***’ slides my iphone and unlocks it, then scrolls the screen and straight away opens the YOU TUBE application , then scrolls down to see if there are any of his favorite rhymes already displayed , if not he asks us to search by pointing at the search button “. They were like Ohhh!!!

Finally when we were about to live, we asked him to say thank you to the little cutey girl . He lifted the girl’s hand, shook with his and said " akka, thakii"(Meaning Thank You – this was for the ball she allowed him to play ) . One thing which really came in as a surprise to both me and my husband was he finally made a gesture to the little girl by moving his hand over his forehead(meaning good night). When the girl did not return the gesture, he finally lifted her hand towards her forehead. Everyone started laughing at this!!!

This is what made me think “Why do we treat our children as demonstration pieces forcing them to demonstrate their skills in front of every known faces”. If really interested and once comfortable, kids will themselves come out of the shell and showcase their talent..is’nt it??

 

Yes z4,
Everyone would have faced this situation at some point or the other and yes am sure someone would have also compared your multiplication skills with their kids too!!
Thanks for coming here...

 

Thanks dear for dropping by...hope every parent understands this and encourage their kids, life would be so easy ...

 

Thanks sabari for liking the blog..glad to know it was of some use to you dear...and thanks for such a huge compliment too