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Kid Has Trouble Making Friends At School - Suggestions Required To Make Friends

Discussion in 'Schoolgoers & Teens' started by lvarada, Apr 20, 2018.

  1. lvarada

    lvarada Bronze IL'ite

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    Hi,
    We moved to US from India last year. My DD is 8 years old and only child. She completed 2nd grade at chennai and moved to 3rd grade here at US. The language was an issue before and she was bullied by her classmates for her accent and plumpness. Its come down now. But still, she does not have any friends. Even in after school day care, she is alone playing with dolls and tells me that no one else plays with her. Since I am working, I can arrange for play dates only when I can work from home or on weekends. She has had a few play dates. Her classmates are atleast a year older to her because of the age at which they started the school vs the indian school age. She is hyperactive and her teacher has cited that as one of the reason. I am not able to make her mellow down. When she gets excited, she wants to do her own thing. Maturity wise, she is very innocent for her age. I need suggestions from all the experienced moms on how to help my kid. Please help!

    Regards,
    Lalitha
     
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  2. Sandycandy

    Sandycandy IL Hall of Fame

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    I am sorry your child is being bullied in school. Does your daughters hyperactivity affect other aspects like studies, focusing in class and getting her day to day chores done ?
     
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  3. poovai

    poovai Platinum IL'ite

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    Depends on the city where you live, neighborhood, racial mix of students play a major role, also.

    Sooner or later, Indian kids will get isolated in middle/high school. Asian kids (Chinese / Indian) slowly filtered out from the rest for various reasons - study focused, strict up bringing, etc.

    One of the option, invite kids for a weekend party! (skating / bowling / movies / mini golf followed by pizza outing)
    Send off the kids with goody bags...few times a year.

    Make friends with other kids parents (volunteer to babysit kids on school day off - working parents will like that).

    .......I used to hang around (baby sit) with my son's friends, volunteer to drive them around for their activities.....
     
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  4. lvarada

    lvarada Bronze IL'ite

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    Sandycandy, It does not affect her studies or focusing in class. Day to day chores are a little bit of issue. For e.g if I tell her to do 1,2,3 items, only 1 or 3 will get done and when I remind her of the other then she will remember and will do that.
    She loves Math and also to learn new things. So reading is also interesting to her but when she started her academics here in US it was an issue as she was not used to reading a lot on her own in India.
     
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  5. lvarada

    lvarada Bronze IL'ite

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    Her class is predominantly white with a good mix of Indian students. I realize now that I have to mingle more and make friends. I used to be outgoing with lots of friends but after coming here, life has changed a lot. With lot of personal , work and health issues all happening at the same time, I became more reserved and not outgoing. Didn't have much energy to mingle and do other stuff. Will start doing it. Thanks for the suggestions Poovai.
     
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  6. Sandycandy

    Sandycandy IL Hall of Fame

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    Start by listing her chores on a white board , some kids are very visual and fare better with written instructions .
    Enroll her in activities that involve her interacting with a group of kids ( soccer or any other similar sport). Definitely keep the play dates going.
    Have you thought about volunteering in her school if you have time ? Build a rapport with the teacher and also parents of her classmates. Not all but atleast a few that you connect with.
    Bullying can affect ones self esteem , so make sure to boost her confidence, praise her and also highlight her positives. Make sure her weekends at home are happy. Your child seems to be very enthusiastic ,honestly a nice quality to have. God bless her !!


     
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  7. lvarada

    lvarada Bronze IL'ite

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    Thanks SandyCandy for the suggestion.
     
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