Is it absolutely necessary to make love on the first night? Getting married soon!!

AmritaSharma85 · Oct 3, 2012

Hi, this is my first post here! I'm 27 years old and getting married soon. It's an arranged match. I have been out on dates with my would-be husband and by all means, he seems like a genuinely good and sweet person. But I haven't been able to bring up the topic of sex, yet, in our conversations coz I'm a little shy and I don't know if it will be appropriate or not. I'm still a virgin, if this matters.

It's pretty awkward to ask him this question, hence I actually wanted to know what other women feel about it. Is it totally necessary to have sex on the first night together? Just feels a little awkward, when you haven't totally known your husband yet and wedding in itself, is quite a hectic business, LOL! But, do most Indian newlywed women do it with their husband on the first night itself? Am I "expected" to do it?

Ladies, please answer! Thanks, in advance!

GodIsOne · Oct 3, 2012

Re: Is it absolutely necessary to have sex on the first night? I'm getting married so

Well...what worked for others might not work for you. It is totally up to you and your hubby to decide.

Decentguy · Oct 3, 2012

Re: Is it absolutely necessary to have sex on the first night? I'm getting married so

AmritaSharma85 said: ↑

Hi, this is my first post here! I'm 27 years old and getting married soon. It's an arranged match. I have been out on dates with my would-be husband and by all means, he seems like a genuinely good and sweet person. But I haven't been able to bring up the topic of sex, yet, in our conversations coz I'm a little shy and I don't know if it will be appropriate or not. I'm still a virgin, if this matters.

It's pretty awkward to ask him this question, hence I actually wanted to know what other women feel about it. Is it totally necessary to have sex on the first night together? Just feels a little awkward, when you haven't totally known your husband yet and wedding in itself, is quite a hectic business, LOL! But, do most Indian newlywed women do it with their husband on the first night itself? Am I "expected" to do it?

Ladies, please answer! Thanks, in advance!
Click to expand...

It all depends on you and your husband. In many cases, couples don't have sex because they are tired the day of the wedding( because of the wedding ceremony, reception etc) and they just want to take rest and sleep. Also there is little privacy at home with all family members and relatives around

I would think when couples go to honeymoon for a for few days, thats the time they have time to know each other(if arranged marriage), they have privacy and they are together. I would believe thats the time they are intimate with each other. I am sure many couples would agree.

steve · Oct 3, 2012

Re: Is it absolutely necessary to have sex on the first night? I'm getting married so

You heard the others. As they say you can do when you are ready and work with him about it.

But...

Like swimming, if you don't take that plunge the wait could be unnecessarily long. After doing it, you could feel silly about not having done it sooner.

tulipzz · Oct 3, 2012

Re: Is it absolutely necessary to have sex on the first night? I'm getting married so

[JUSTIFY][/JUSTIFY]We were tired for days after the wedding! We went on a honeymoon to a remote island (apparently one of the mat beautiful places on earth!) and still did nothing! It was more of getting to know each other better and become good friends....(that 10 days was the only nice time we had)....

We did it after a month....

Take time if you want to, make sure you both are on the same page about how you choose to start your married life....

christine014 · Oct 3, 2012

Re: Is it absolutely necessary to have sex on the first night? I'm getting married so

I'm sure, since you said your would be is a nice guy, you two will get to talk about how you feel about your first night before doing anything. It all depends on how close you feel with your husband. Maybe once you move in together, it will be much more comfortable for both of you to make a move.
Although I knew my husband for 6 years by the time we got married, I dedicated my time solely to finishing my wedding cake, the week after marriage There's no need to rush in, after all , you two have your entire life ahead together.
And Congratulations !! Have a good time.

fencesitter · Oct 3, 2012

Re: Is it absolutely necessary to have sex on the first night? I'm getting married so

The right person to answer is the man whom you gonna marry! Sex can wait. its better if you guys spend few days/weeks and be comfortable with each other before seeing each others imperfect bodies.

sushmavja · Oct 3, 2012

Re: Is it absolutely necessary to have sex on the first night? I'm getting married so

it can wait..no need to hurry..but dont wait till long..

vanithasekar · Oct 3, 2012

Re: Is it absolutely necessary to have sex on the first night? I'm getting married so

actually it depends..

if ur husband is very much interested, it is difficult to say NO.

HasiniS · Oct 3, 2012

Re: Is it absolutely necessary to have sex on the first night? I'm getting married so

But, do most Indian newlywed women do it with their husband on the first night itself? - If others answer is YES to this question, will you also do it even if you are not so comfortable on that day ??

Am I "expected" to do it? - answer is same as above ...