Is Indian Culture Relative Awesome

ChennaiExpress · Jul 9, 2017

Ok I am traumatized by reading some of these posts.

A mother forcing her daughter to get married and then hitting her head 10 to 15 times when the daughter disagrees.

Holy $hit

Honestly all my prayers and heart goes out to you.

Funny ---- outsiders think Indians are awesome.

Maybe because they make nice husbands and wives to non-Indians.

Well, at the very least, they make nice wives to non-Indians who are generally less "entitled" than the males we hear about on these forums.

I knew a non-Indian lady from Toastmasters who is frustrated with her US-based Desi husband.

When I narrated a story of Lord Krishna giving an untouchable fruit-selling lady a hug and loading her bags with diamonds and rubies, the non-Indian lady evaluated my speech.

She was agitated that her Desi husband never told her this type of story of Lord Krishna.

Later during Table Topics she mentioned she would divorce her Husband. Whisky-Tango-Foxtrot? How does Lord Krishna make one think of divorce?

But holy cow .... I cannot get over the fact that parents are forcing the daughter to get married. I hope the daughter moves out and stays away from social media.

Best advice is to never talk unless someone talks first. Strive to keep conversations short. I'm not sure how easy it is to do in India though.

Ok, back to issue at hand.

Ladies (or gents) if you find someone (or someone finds you) and they like Indian culture, and like the Indian part of you, best part would be to show your very best, rather than tell the dirty laundry.

I caught a glimpse of some serial SONY TV serial where gossipy neighborhood ladies are barging into someone's home.

Aren't there hobbies bored ladies can take up other than forming neighborhood cliques and gossiping.

Or maybe it's an exaggeration in Indian serials, just like soon-to-be married couples getting kidnapped 10 times in a year by the same goons hired by the same estranged girlfriend who has been pregnant for 2 years and shows no signs.

SMH

There is someone I am looking at (no I am not going to jump on him like Tigger jumps on Winnie the Pooh so stop that!) who thinks Indian culture is wonderful as his culture.

And I'm just thinking, wow Mister, you must have seen some really interesting things to think that!

Honestly, we can count our blessings.

We must count or blessings.

It is a sin to force and compel someone into marriage

@shubha1987 @gitika I pray you find peace and the Man of your Dreams. Lots of {{{hugs}}} to you.

Sunshine04 · Jul 9, 2017

Do you mean relatively awesome.

Sandycandy · Jul 9, 2017

We are not all that bad , are we ? It's not like every Indian hammers the child's head forcing them to get married . Arranged marriages get a bad rap, but honestly it's a good way to meet a guy with a similar background as yours , with the intention of marriage. Ofcourse our culture can be pretty oppressive towards women, but I think things are changing . Just take the good and shun the bad !

ashneys · Jul 9, 2017

I think it's not right to generalise. Every country, every culture has its ups n downs.

There is no such thing as the "perfect" country or "perfect" culture.

Indian, western, European, Asian, African or anything, this 'perfection' just doesn't exist, anywhere. Every system has its pros n cons. It's about how each makes it to work for themselves.

My cousins, friends who married through traditional arranged marriages, are genuinely happy, even romantic and plays silly like children when they themselves have bigger children.

I have seen my uncle cook, clean, mop, n go to work because my aunt was taking care of the child (both perfectly healthy). Another relative cuts vegetables every day for cooking. I have seen parents who sold every last penny to fund the passion of their children. In laws funding the wedding and even bought a separate house for their son n dil to live separately. In laws sending dil to college. A widowed parent never got remarried for the child. A husband give up his passion to provide for his family. Even in my own household, I have witnessed my great grandmother, grandmother, mother, aunts, cousin sisters have more voice than the men in their household, in a healthy - mutual respect manner.

They are just a few examples, there are many like that. N I have never seen these men complain or voice out any of it as a problem. They just say I am doing for 'My' family. N these men belongs to the so called traditional orthodox circle.

We have a beautiful family system enriched with all the cultural background n history. Just like everything has its good n bad, there are some who abuses this and the other that enjoys it.