Hi my mother always taught me to be a gracious hostess, offering tea, snacks etc. This does not mean other people reciprocate. I have friends that have dinners, meals etc at my house and I have yet to see the inside of their houses. It is ok, if you are ok with it. If they are good friends then accept them the way they are. If they are just friends through kids, or acquaintances don't sweat it. Stop inviting them, and if you do decide what you will serve them. I am the type of person that no matter who comes to my home I offer them multiple things. So just leave it at that.