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Irritating Neighbor Of A Friend

Discussion in 'Friends & Neighbours' started by Vedhavalli, Jan 27, 2018.

  1. SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

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    Instead of ignoring this annoying couples altogether, your friend needs to find fine balance when it comes to interacting with neighbors.
    She must take it as a lesson, and move forward in life.

    She can help as much as she wants within her limitation. If not, she should learn the art of saying NO without feeling guilt.
    She can do only so much, given the fact that she has an active work and family of her own.
    She needs to accept this first.

    The next time, when such a request comes from this couple, your friend can chose to say 1) NO, 2) Later 3) Let's see
    kind of answers, instead of rushing to help them as a priority.
    This way, she can continue to keep their request in mind, while attending to her other needs. If time permits, she can go about helping them. If not, she can decline it with a sorry.
    She needs to repeat this consistently without paying heed to their reactions.
    She shouldn't be bothered too much about their "thanks" or "criticism", rather concentrate on her own matters as soon as possible.
    This way, the neighbor will understand their limits with your friend, even though it is not explicitly communicated.
     
    sindmani, Vedhavalli and Anjana124 like this.
  2. Vedhavalli

    Vedhavalli Platinum IL'ite

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    Thank you all.
    Yesterday the my friend's neghibour lady called multiple times and my friend didn't pick. Today she came to her house and started calling her name n kiddo's name in loud voice, the time was 8 am. My friend told her I'm busy... She has told her some unexpected words..hurt my friend. Saying one day you will also face this. Etc big drama. My friend had shut the door. Cried and called me. How can a old person be like that? Too selfish , wants things to be done free of cost and with ease. She knows her limits by not asking anything to her son and daughter.
    I told my friend, just ignore. Here after she wouldn't trouble you.

    Hope for the best.
     
    shravs3 and sumalynux like this.
  3. sumalynux

    sumalynux IL Hall of Fame

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    Good guess at least your friend now knows their true colors. Take help when possible and talk bad and also curse when said NO.

    Tell your friend to ignore them totally. And not talk to them again..
     
  4. ashneys

    ashneys Platinum IL'ite

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    Wow that lady sure is something. But this is in a way good for your friend because it means two things:

    That even if she helps them a million times but denies even once, they will remember only the "one no" rather than the "million yes".

    Next, since the lady fought n went, she can use this itself as a reason enough to cut ties with them once n for all.

    Ask her to not give in if they try to extend a hand, "saying"
    - her husband is yelling at her for the scene the old lady caused
    - n that all the stress is affecting her job too, - n this is the first time anyone has come yelling to the door
    - n no one has ever treated them like this ever.
    - Even her parents n in laws were yelling at her for giving someone space to treat her like this.
    - That it was life lesson learnt to not be too helping or kind.
    - n to leave her n her family alone.

    Hope she stays strong n find her peace n sanity back.
     
    sindmani, nakshatra1 and shravs3 like this.
  5. nakshatra1

    nakshatra1 Platinum IL'ite

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    Absolutely disgusting person - your friend should call up her son and inform about their mother's behavior. This is bullying.
     
    shravs3 likes this.
  6. googleearth

    googleearth Silver IL'ite

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    I would have called cops if someone was abusing me in front if my house, don't care about age.
     
  7. shravs3

    shravs3 IL Hall of Fame

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    Yes as many suggested best option for your friend is to first get their sons contact and tell them tat their parents are really annoying . personal life and career is getting affected . So let them take care of their parents instead . And start ignoring tat lady no matter wat
     
  8. lavani

    lavani Platinum IL'ite

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    Why do people think WORK FROM HOME is easy. I am not quoting you at all. I WORK FROM home. I take way tooo less breaks than when i goto office. Office i will be taking a walk every 30 mins. here i am ultra focused and sit in the same place for almost constant 2 hours straight.
     

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