How I despise the above term? The other day I met a lady who claimed I have the typical desi mentality since I cook three times a day..and also commented on few other things. Well.. I do it out of love and my own interest. What is the real "mentality" which needs to change? 1) Commenting on others choices be it food habits,dressing style,whether they wear bindi or not,mangalsutra or not. 2) Comparing kids.period. 3) Looking at another women giving the "sly" eye look. 4) Comparing status and who is dressed more richer. 5) Blindly following a different culture and putting down fellow Indians. 6) Not having a live and let live attitude. Real "Indian mentality" which need not change... 1) Cooking for even 6 times a day out of personal love and interest for the family. 2) Dressing in Indian attire and watching Bollywood movies/serials. 3) Making kids understand Indian tradition/temple visits despite people claiming to give them real America.(Forcing is a different thing) 4) Trying to save money by not buying brands.Many of my friends who can afford even 10 Louie vittons still live a simple life and buy only what is needed.Admirable in a way. Hmm..anyways have a good day all!
You could not have analysed it better! You have your priorities and thinking in the right place. The best way to be at peace with ourselves is follow what we have grown up with and feel is right - there is certainly no need to ape the west or any different culture just to gel with the crowd. I am sure people who are genuine will always realise and appreciate your ways
I know many ladies living in society discussing most of the time how much their husband earn what best they have in jewellery and clothes and they keep competing each other everyday on all this. I can't even stand with them. If someone has more then they should share with needy instead of showing it off.
If there is something that you do the Indian way and is not permissable there,it makes sense to point out.Otherwise what's the harm in following what best you like?
Anika, I agree with what you said about what to change and what not to change of Indian mentality. I want to add one more thing of Indian attitude which need to change. Thinking and feel sad about other's comment towards us. Do what makes you happy, comfortable which is not harmful to anyone and ignore others view or comments.
The other day when I chose to drink some home made rice porridge with fresh leaves, one of my colleague commented that I have a typical Sri Lankan mentality. Of course I chose this porridge despite of having varieties of junk/fast foods in our cafeteria. Upon her comment on my Sri Lankan mentality, I felt so proud. It was like getting an applaud for your choice of living. I am Sri Lankan - despite of the fact that I have a Canadian citizenship, and I lived/worked in so many countries. I fail to understand your worries and attitude behind your post about "Indian mentality" Of course, cooking 3 times or 6 times can be termed as "Indian mentality", because I know many Indian prefer home made foods, specifically certain Indian food. It is ofcourse Indian mentality. What is wrong in that? An Indian to have Indian mentality is a pride. There is no pride in having an American mentality losing your originality? Every culture has its best and the worst parts. American or the western culture is no different either. Likewise, Indians do have a better life style. Not just you, but many people feel inferior about their originality. It is strange. A Jew would like to have a Jewish mentality no matter where he lives. Same applies to a Japanese or chinese. And of course the French do not change their French mentality. They may live in the US, but still they are proud about who they are, and what originality they belong to. And they won't feel inferior about it. Why do you feel bad or sad or inferior, and hence angry about your friend's comment here? You, being an Indian, with so much love to your nation, having an Indian mentality is not a surprise. Take it as a complement and say "Yes, I have Indian mentality, and I am happy about it". Period!!!
You fail to see the point I make.I have always respected your posts but sometimes I feel for everything I post...I felt You feel the need to point out something.I am not always right yes but this post does not say anything wrong too.I never said anything about "inferior".Everything is not inferior.Probably..I lack the way to express... The lady did not say that as a compliment.She is Indian too and I do know what she said.I mentioned the points clearly which is a mentality and which is not.As you said,each culture comes with plus and minus.true.she also said certain things which I did not mention. Anyways..thanks for the reply.
Of course you did not post anything about inferiority in this post directly. But the way you articulated the OP seemed as if you were offended by the comment of your friend about your "indian mentality". The way you described the scene and explained why you cooked 3 times - which was the reason why your friend commented as Indian mentality. And the way you went on to say what mentality is to be changed and what not. Altogether, the post sounded as if your friend's comment was something negative, and you were kind of offended, and you are here to seek others opinion of the same. Perhaps, my supportive counselling background (15 years in this field professionally) made me dig through your this post, and several of your other posts - that speaks almost the same stuff as the OP above, to conclude my response above. I am sorry, but I don't believe in responding to what is written here, but i always feel it is important to see or at least to understand what is not written in the OP. Nevertheless, I am sorry if my response was offensive. I didn't mean to offend you here.
