I'm Marrying an Iyer Boy and I Have Loads of Questions! (Apologies in advance!)

Spending needs to be within means .... If you can afford , a lavish wedding for self or offspring is perfectly acceptable . It is ultimately a personal memory and for most once in a life time event.

just like buying expensive bags , expensive boots , expensive vacations , if done within means perfectly acceptable .


if you buy a an expensive Gucci , coach etc etc bag even though you cannot afford it , it is your problem not others who are able to afford it.

 

Where did u find torture here .. Is ur friends r relatives torturing brides parents in the name of dowry go now ask them change them if u can we wil be happy ..

n spending for daughters marriage without burdening n stressing financially within the limits can never be a torture for fathers ..

dont speak about religion it will eat ur brain ..

 

Who should avoid it and how ?

is it ok if both sides spend on it.?

 

???? what you wrote makes no sense, write clearly.

 

Read others post it is this forum and see what happens in Indian wedding it is always the brides parents who will be forced to pay and there are people who are happy to say that this is a ritual, custom blah blah

 

What are you asking here for me to write looks nuisance to me .. So do ur job ..

 

I am not sure why you think anyone is giving "empty bashan"? Most people are clearly stating that they are starting the change with themselves. If that is not the most powerful call for change what is?

 

my comment is a reply to a specific comment.

 

Indian is a vast county , no custom is followed through out. In my part of the world, both parties have expenses for different ceremonies or they share if they skip any.

custom is saying father has to bear the expenses of the ceremony, it could be a ceremony in a hut or ceremony in a palace. custom does not say you have to do with such and such price tag.

brides family has an option to say NO to such requests and such groom.

OP - sorry for digression, please don't take this personally, I am writing in general not regarding you specifically.