Illumination Point

Dear Satchi,

Some by nature are longing for solitude while others seek company of fellow beings for help, assistance, guidance and support in life. Neither of them are wrong. Many times, people blame someone like to be alone most of the time. There is nothing wrong in that because it gives a lot of time to think about life and its purpose.

By nature I had some qualities from my childhood even though I was born as a second son. I liked to be alone most of the time. I spent a lot of time thinking and watching my behavior, studying what circumstances change me substantially, how possessive I am, how much tolerance I have, etc. Self-observation comes naturally to me.

Later, this has become a negative quality at work as I am known and called, "as a single-man army". My productivity when I work alone is 3X of what I do when I work with others. I was blamed many times as not a team player. I am good teacher and likes to teach people about how to get things done but somehow I didn't have the attitude to let others get involved in my work. Knowing this as a weakness or strength, my CEO used to engage me in very critical mission all alone and openly mentioned in the meeting that I was a one-man army. It didn't bother me as I think and act better if I am alone.

When I got older, this solitude helped me to understand life's perspective better. I can recreate situations in my mind and analyze how I could have done things differently or avoided a few words. Solitude has become a great strength now in my work as well, as I work alone closing transactions. The nature of work I do anyway doesn't allow sharing of information as everything I touch are confidential.

Viswa

 

My dear Satchi

Quote Another mystery seems to have got solved in my head. The result of all my solitude! I have been wondering how it was that when I had so much to do as a young person, I still got bored. Now when I have a lot more free time (including periods of nothing to do), I find time flies as if it has wings. This mystery got cleared up this past week when I had a busier schedule all 5 days of the week - more than I have had in some time. I was so exhausted and by the time I got to the end of one day it was the start of another.

When we are young, we have plenty to do and plenty of energy - physical and mental. Time does not keep pace with us. It drags along leading to boredom.
When we are older and slow down, needing more time to relax, it appears as if there is no time between returning from work one day and going to work another day. Days seem to fly by.Quote

I second to what you have written. Your narration is super

 

Dear satchi,

Both before and after marriage, having been a part of a very big family, I learnt to detach myself mentally, but never let others know about it even for a moment. Now I am at the crossroads when i feel time is running out and the energy to do things which i dreamt about at a young age is not there. So one has to accept gracefully what God has offered us, live a contented life and exit peacefully!
Agatha83