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I don't know what to do?

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by luc, Jan 4, 2012.

  1. luc

    luc Silver IL'ite

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    I have been married for 2 years now. Its a love marriage. I have a perfect husband who loves me like crazy and have the best in laws in this whole world. my husband and I are living separately because we could not find a job together.

    MY ISSUE is that:
    I am falling for this guy at my work place and i like him to that extend that if he talks to any other girl i feel so jealous. I don't know if he feels the same way sometimes i think he does but sometimes i don't think he does. He is unmarried.. I feel i go an extra mile for him to care for him. He knows that I care for him a lot, i show it to him all the time. I feel disgusted at times , i feel so guilty that i am feeling this way for this guy, I have an amazing husband. I feel disgusted in the sense that when i am with this guy i dont answer my husbands call. And when i do i answer in such a way that i just want to get off the phone. I absolutely stopped caring for my husband because i started to care for this guy. I feel like ****. I don't know what to do .. I try so hard to stop my heart but when i talk to this guy and spend time with him i go crazy again. Pls advice what to do ? I feel so ridiculous.. I try so hard to not to talk to this guy but whenever he calls i drop everything to be with him... I am going crazy over this guy ..
     
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  2. passionate89

    passionate89 Platinum IL'ite

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    You say you have a wonderful husband and best inlaws... Then I really don't understand how will you ever fall for some other guy? In this case, you need to think and find out what is making you get attracted to that guy....

    Just imagine a situation where your husband is in your place.. How would you react? When you start to think over this, you will feel guilty and start to avoid him..

    If you really want to get rid of him, then there are ample of ways try to get another job, try to get transferred to another branch, etc...
     
  3. DST

    DST Bronze IL'ite

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    Reading your post made a must reply...I would say you got a perfect family - husband and In-laws. Be happy and lead a happy and peaceful life which is good for YOU AND YOUR FAMILY MEMBERS. AVOID UNNECESSARY CREATURES IN A PERFECT LIFE.


    For now, Two things come to my mind,

    1. Resign your job and be with your husband. Try to find a job for yourself where your husband is.

    2. If your husband has the same feeling with another girl, how will you react/how do you feel?????
    Wake up girl,be matured and have a happy life with your husband.

    Its all like messing up a perfect life. Hope you have seen ladies out here longing for their husbands love and happy life and torture free in-laws. I say, its all like pouring sand on you!!!!!

    Forget ittt!!!
     
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  4. luc

    luc Silver IL'ite

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    I have made my husband cry because I am not giving him enough time. He misses me a lot because he is away from me. I feel so bad , i feel like god is going to punish me for what I am doing to my husband. I feel so horrible! I do try to avoid this guy but we have common friends so i bump into him and then it starts all over again. I go all crazy caring for him, cooking for him, going shopping with him.
     
  5. passionate89

    passionate89 Platinum IL'ite

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    When you think you cant do it, Then U CANT DO IT! If you really want to avoid this guy and feel guilty of cheating your lovely hubby, you will surely try out the above said alternatives..

    Avoid your common friends contact... Stop them completely! Its a matter of life..
     
  6. passionate89

    passionate89 Platinum IL'ite

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    There are so many people longing for their husband's love , inlaws care and affection... But when you are blessed with everythin, you need to learn how to safeguard it... All you can do is, quit your job spend all your time with ur in laws and hubby... Sacrifice and dedicate yourself to such lovely people.. Then there will be no chance for you to say that you "ain't able to get rid of this guy"
     
  7. hemalathaK

    hemalathaK Platinum IL'ite

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    Dear luc, please for God's sake realize the mistake you are doing in your life.God has given you such a wonderful life but you seem to be acting like a teenager.

    Take control over your mind and think about your happy moments with your husband that happened when you both were together.
     
  8. blackbeauty84

    blackbeauty84 IL Hall of Fame

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    Luc, you have realised this is wrong and you are finding it tough to get into action. Please repeat yourself these lines every time you think of this guy " I have a wonderful husband & family, I won't mess up my life for some feelings"

    Start with strict do lists:
    1)Call your husband often. This will make you realise what you are blessed with
    2) Cut down the talks with him other than Hi-Bye
    3)If you have work at home option-utilise that so you will bump into him lesser
    4)Find out the times you talk- Like Coffee time, Lunch time. Call somebody your mom , friend. So that you don't have time to talk
    5)You are just attreacted to some part of him that you want in your husband. Sometime you will understand it.
    6)Change your friends circle.
    7)Start meditating. That will give you peace & strength.
    7
     
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  9. fencesitter

    fencesitter Platinum IL'ite

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    Its funny! There are people who are fiercely faithful and crave for spouse's love and attention but they do not get and there are people who have been blessed with a great spouse but willingly and knowingly screw it.May be irony of life!
     
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  10. IndianFunTube

    IndianFunTube New IL'ite

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    Here's some food for thought. Ever wondered why people who win a lottery usually squander away their wealth in a short span of time? The reason is simple. They don't know the value of what they have because they haven't earned it though hard work/sweat/toil/tears. Same applies to you as well. Luck has gifted you an awesome family and you're hell bent on screwing up the gift. I wish your husband had made a better choice. All the best.
     
    Last edited: Jan 4, 2012
    17 people like this.

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