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Husband's Cheating!!!!

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by realityuser, Sep 7, 2013.

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  1. Sep 7, 2013 #11
    tulipzz

    tulipzz Platinum IL'ite

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    Op, no matter how educated you are, what kind of job you hold, there are certain rules an Indian woman is expected to follow

    - If you consume alcohol, it should be a top top secret.....strictly no alcohol at inlaws place even if the sky falls down

    -What are these villagers etc doing in your relationship? It's not like children fighting and elders getting them to patch up. By discussing all this crap with villagers, you are giving them free entertainment and you both are making fools of yourselves

    - did you not know about your inlaws/husbands conservative mentality? Why did you come back from US?

    -
     
    tulipzz, Sep 7, 2013
    tulipzz, Sep 7, 2013
    #11
    1 person likes this.
  2. Sep 7, 2013 #12
    Maddy2087

    Maddy2087 Platinum IL'ite

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    Mummyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy :bang:bang:bang:bang

    Who strictly follows Panchayati Raj system in this day and age ? You have already made your mind to live with a cheat because you are waiting for him to take you with him :)

    Good luck reality user.I hope that you will wake from the dream soon :)
     
    Maddy2087, Sep 7, 2013
    Maddy2087, Sep 7, 2013
    #12
    2 people like this.
  3. Sep 7, 2013 #13
    realityuser

    realityuser New IL'ite

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    What else i can do on approaching villagers/mediators as we can not solve our problems by ourselves(DH is not even trying to think like a present generation guy though he is well educated and spent 6 yrs in USA).

    tulip@ After returning from US i came to know about their mentality(including original DH's mentality). Based on my DH's choice we returned. So many times he expressed that he is not satisfying with my behavior(Individuality and i behaves like present century women) and also for small fight he imagines as a big(according to him there should be 0% fight in family and wife has to shut her mouth at any cost) and i did not took so serious as if we fight in the morning..by the evening we get close. Now i'm realizing the DH's plan to India.

    His plan: If we were in India and at IL's house, without doing job and by observing/following his mother I will lost individuality(freedom to express my feelings) and he knows i wont shout/argue/fight in front of others though he does. By doing this he wants to make me like a slave who only cooks and cleans for him etc..etc
    I beard so many months and started opening my mouth in front of others if there is no mistake from my side and left IL's house by breaking his secret plan!!!

    I'm very open and express everything to my DH so he knows me in and out but my DH shares whatever he wants and maintains secrecy and he never express until he wants to share!!!!

    Please suggest me at least to live our remaining lives happily and how to get out from the past happenings/present situations????
     
    realityuser, Sep 7, 2013
    realityuser, Sep 7, 2013
    #13
  4. Sep 7, 2013 #14
    maroon

    maroon Gold IL'ite

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    OP, feel sorry for your situation. There seem to be way too many issues between you and DH, not withstanding inlaws and villagers interfering. You are also determined to just not move on in life. I dont know what to suggest but felt like replying to your post. How can you love someone who has caused so much misery in your life? Sorry to say this but your H has a heart of stone if he has lied to everyone so blatantly about so many things. I guess you should really think about it and before it is too late, start a new chapter in your life. Otherwise, its you who are making a choice to rot in life. TIME TO DECIDE.
     
    maroon, Sep 7, 2013
    maroon, Sep 7, 2013
    #14
  5. Sep 7, 2013 #15
    Anitap

    Anitap IL Hall of Fame

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    @realityuser get real.

    Let the dust settle from all the drama so you can think clearly. Never resign your job no matter what in future.
     
    Anitap, Sep 7, 2013
    Anitap, Sep 7, 2013
    #15
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  6. Sep 7, 2013 #16
    realityuser

    realityuser New IL'ite

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    I know it's not worth to live with him. But I believe i still have so much love on him(Don't know why?) and also to be frank i want a kid to lead a meaningful life.
    Once i have a kid no matter he changes or not i wont care and i will ignore him and spend my life with our kid.
     
    realityuser, Sep 7, 2013
    realityuser, Sep 7, 2013
    #16
  7. Sep 7, 2013 #17
    mmrajee

    mmrajee Junior IL'ite

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    Why don't you try for a counselling? Nowadays marriage counsellors are really helping many couples to lead a happy family life...
     
    mmrajee, Sep 7, 2013
    mmrajee, Sep 7, 2013
    #17
  8. Sep 7, 2013 #18
    Twinkel

    Twinkel Platinum IL'ite

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    [​IMG]
     
    Twinkel, Sep 7, 2013
    Twinkel, Sep 7, 2013
    #18
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  9. Sep 7, 2013 #19
    Maddy2087

    Maddy2087 Platinum IL'ite

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    Wouldn't it be more like jumping from fire to a frying pan .Bringing kids into such a situation will definitely inflict more pain . What values do you think your kids will learn in such an obnoxious environment ?

    Please hold your horses and think calmly and wisely. Love is good but blind love is always injurious :)
     
    Maddy2087, Sep 7, 2013
    Maddy2087, Sep 7, 2013
    #19
    2 people like this.
  10. Sep 7, 2013 #20
    Maddy2087

    Maddy2087 Platinum IL'ite

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    LOL :rotfl:rotfl
     
    Maddy2087, Sep 7, 2013
    Maddy2087, Sep 7, 2013
    #20
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