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Husband spends too much money on his family.

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by renegade, Aug 26, 2011.

  1. rajijanu

    rajijanu New IL'ite

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    Hi, I have had so much of such experiences in my past and still am going through it currently. Many of you have given such good advices but it hardly works. Atleast i can say in my case it never has worked. Talking patiently with my husband or indirectly pointing out that unnecessary spending does not help. It still bothers me and the only way out is to cry it out cause discussing with h means straining our relationship further. I feel better today reading out all of your experiences and feel that i am not alone in this struggle. At times when i feel so sad and depressed, this website has been very comforting to me. Thanks
     
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  2. mybaby1

    mybaby1 Gold IL'ite

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    i completely agree with amen.many parents impose this debt on their son but i want to ask that why its not daughters debt too...why only son and along with him his wife and children also has to pay this debt. in todays world where no difference is there in a boy or girl education n upbringing why the debt is to be born only by the son...?

    secondly i m also a mother of a son and i say this that it is PARENTS who want to be parents so they bring a child in this world then why alwaz keep on saying this that we did this n that for you to your child...he never came and asked you to bring him in this world it was your choice..so now why should he pay for this.
     
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  3. anugamit

    anugamit Platinum IL'ite

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    :iagree... well said
     
  4. aaella

    aaella New IL'ite

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    That is such a bull sheet! It is different to respect your parents. But not pouring money on them when they are financially sound and new married couple try to meet ends and think about the future and the baby. So what that the parents put you thru school, nothing special about that it is their duty. Every parent wants what the best for their kids so they are not special. Kids come with expenses, if the parents don't have the money to have kids they shouldn't have them. Instead Indian parents give birth to slaves not kids who have to give the money back for the rest of their lives as a part of appreciation of being born! That is stupid!
    After the marriage everything what husband make belongs to the couple not to him. Every decision he made should be shared one. He has a responsibility to his wife and his children not to his parents (except his respect), or his sister. I bet you, he is in credit card debt to keep up with all the demand his family expect from him. Putting his wife in stress. It is selfish and egocentric from his parents to do that! And they don't have any right to put such a baggage on the young couple shoulders. If he is in debt because of them and lets say gets in accident and dies guess who the credit company will come after.... that's right his wife. They will not care she has a baby and no money, he puts her future in danger because of his selfish parents. Its not like they don't have roof over their head, they should be thankful he got good job, can support his family and have a good start in life and not treat him like the slave who owns them money for bringing him to life! They don't have right to spend his money, and it is very disrespectful not include the wife in any of those decision. All the old people in India want respect but you need to earn respect, and the way how they use their son and disrespect his wife they don't deserve any respect! Shame on them. They are selfish and ignorant!
     
  5. aaella

    aaella New IL'ite

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    That is such a bull sheet! It is different to respect your parents. But not pouring money on them when they are financially sound and new married couple try to meet ends and think about the future and the baby. So what that the parents put you thru school, nothing special about that it is their duty. Every parent wants what the best for their kids so they are not special. Kids come with expenses, if the parents don't have the money to have kids they shouldn't have them. Instead Indian parents give birth to slaves not kids who have to give the money back for the rest of their lives as a part of appreciation of being born! That is stupid!
    After the marriage everything what husband make belongs to the couple not to him. Every decision he made should be shared one. He has a responsibility to his wife and his children not to his parents (except his respect), or his sister. I bet you, he is in credit card debt to keep up with all the demand his family expect from him. Putting his wife in stress. It is selfish and egocentric from his parents to do that! And they don't have any right to put such a baggage on the young couple shoulders. If he is in debt because of them and lets say gets in accident and dies guess who the credit company will come after.... that's right his wife. They will not care she has a baby and no money, he puts her future in danger because of his selfish parents. Its not like they don't have roof over their head, they should be thankful he got good job, can support his family and have a good start in life and not treat him like the slave who owns them money for bringing him to life! They don't have right to spend his money, and it is very disrespectful not include the wife in any of those decision. All the old people in India want respect but you need to earn respect, and the way how they use their son and disrespect his wife they don't deserve any respect! Shame on them. They are selfish and ignorant!
     
  6. aaella

    aaella New IL'ite

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    Umalaut: Family is very important. But it is not fair the young couple has to pay to have the family. What if they refuse to spend the money on his parents? Would the parents be there for them and act as family? Family requires work from both parties, the situation presented here is: as long as their son meets all the demands everyone is satisfied and we shell be happy family!
    Come on really? They are like mafia not parents! Shame on them!
     
    1 person likes this.

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