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husband never gives me any gifts for any occasion...breaks my heart :(

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by priya2782, Feb 7, 2013.

  1. Mahajanpragati

    Mahajanpragati Platinum IL'ite

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    buy a costly gift for yoursel...wrap it & give it to hubby....tell him its gift from him to YOU...........either he will tke the hint or it will shame him or the high cost will make him buy you a gift himself next time............if nothinh happens then keep on buying gift for youself from him.
     
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  2. celia17

    celia17 Silver IL'ite

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    some men are like that......just stop expecting.
     
  3. tulip2012

    tulip2012 Silver IL'ite

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    do not worry dear
    my DH also the same

    I give him gifts , but not surprise ones as he will be with me while shopping, makes spl dishes on his bday, bake care, decorate and all
    but he will explicitly say I dont want any goft on my bday and you dont expet tooo
    hooooo how mean!!!
    im my house even if its 1 st 5 th or 36 th birthday it will be celebrated
    in DH home itis not so and he dont want us to get into taht ractice.

    but once i remember my mom send home bake cake to my place for my b day and my DH was saying abt buying the cake :p
    hmmm.. i tried telling him - how imp are cards and all... but in vain
    i still remember for the birthday soon aft our wedding got fixed as every gal I was expecting a gift from him and it did not arrive!
    finally i ended up crying with him and he couriered me some thing
    where as in my home I will get something new for all my b days

    hope this helped you to reduce your worry
     
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  4. sarada30

    sarada30 Platinum IL'ite

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    Hi Ladies,

    These are very silly things i feel because my dh too dont give me any gift but in return he expects gift from me asking what are you giving me for our anniversary or for birth day or any spcl days. And if i ask him the same he says i am big gift for you................ what else do you want

    so initally i used to break my heart thinking about his nature of gifting then i my self convinced thinking let me give him gifts and njoy the happiness of his expression and feel happy.

    so you gift him and njoy as i do is what i suggest........
     
  5. DGcreative

    DGcreative Platinum IL'ite

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    my DH tries to gift every occasion...earlier he used to try to maintain surprise element but failed miserably. Now he just announces he is going gift shopping or just hands over the gifts. Mostly they all are utility things.....so very thoughtful of him....LOL

    but seriously I dont mind coz gift or no gift he loves me a lot. Touch-wood.
     
  6. smritisinha

    smritisinha Platinum IL'ite

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    Lol...!!! SBBV, a helmet :biglaugh Seriously??? :biglaugh
     
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  7. apsahay40

    apsahay40 Bronze IL'ite

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    In view of most men, there is little significant about these days; some men even need to be told about their own B'day (I am one of that kind).
    Men are quite target oriented, they may do many of these things to impress their women, more specifically before marriage, to be in her thoughts and to get married to her. After marriage, they are already in the loving company of their women, their mind occupies next target, buying a home or car or next level position in the office, for example. It does not mean that they love less after marriage or gives less importance to their women, it just that they concentrate more on big items to express their love.
    In the modern time, some men are already trying to do something about this, either on their own with better understanding of psychology of women (I try to do at least on Wedding anniversary, I must admit that I was reminded by my wife manytime) or forced (for example, I take some sweets to office on my B’day now, not because I wanted to celebrate my B’day, but everyone in my group will be informed through mail and they are not leaving me without some sweets).
    I really fail to understand why most women are too excited about valentine day, B’day etc, these are all issues created by DNA's I suppose.

     
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  8. indianguy2010

    indianguy2010 IL Hall of Fame

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    Not some men. Many men are like OP's husband. ( I am not saying ALL men. There are certainly men who remember anniversaries and birthdays).

    In the first 5 years of our married life, I never remembered my wife's birthday. It does not mean, I do not love her. I do not remember my own birthday too.

    It simply means remembering birthdays and anniversaries are NOT the ways of expressing love, in my perception......probably in the perception of similar men too. So, when she remembered my birthday every year and wished me with gifts, it made me get feel burdened instead of becoming happy. First, I felt her gesture as highly cinematic & artificial. Two, the reciprocation from my side is now becoming a (burdenful) necessity, 'burdenful' because, I knew it is difficult for me to remember her birthday.

    After 5 years, I saw it repeatedly upsets her.....and took the help of Yahoo Reminders. Now every year, reminder comes to my email....and I wish her without fail on her birthday and buy her favourite sweet. Honestly, while doing so, I do not feel anything romantic about it. Rather, it is humorous, funny....and amusing to me while I do so, laughing within myself, "why does this stupid act sounds so romantic to her".

    My(possibly other similar men's) idea of celebrating a birthday or anniversary is different.
     
  9. indianguy2010

    indianguy2010 IL Hall of Fame

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    Hello Mr.Sahay,

    I 100 % agree with you. This is exactly what I posted just next to you. Trust me, I posted mine before reading yours.
     
  10. Poonamk1

    Poonamk1 Silver IL'ite

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    hahahaha...... Please count me in.. My DH is also same.. I think we all should read "Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus".. :D
     

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