How's your DH relation with your parents?

My DH is a little reserved too and does not talk much over the phone to anyone except his family. I was resentful of this because I thought my family should also count as family for him. He talks when my parents call and ask for him but he never initiates the call to them. About his parents, sometimes they ask for me and sometimes they don't. I myself call my MIL sometimes. Although, I used to think" why me when he does not do the same", I realized it was getting me nowhere. So I just continue with what I feel like doing. May be he will turn around one day or may be not

Do what you feel like doing without spoiling any relationship,especially the one with your husband.

 

Please dont force your hubby, he will not have same feelings as you have for your parents, so for him they are inlaws and so he speaks reserved and respected with them. Thats all, i dont think this can be problem.

 

As your DH is reserved by nature i dont think you should play tit for tat and ruin your relationship with your in laws. Atleadt he is not nasty to your parents in any way. Some people are very open and comfoetable with new people and others takes time. Extrovert vs introverts. Have you and dh tried going on vacations or outings with your parents so they can get to know each other and make their own memories?

I have the opposite problem. My dh and in laws are very welcoming and social while my mom is reserved and will hardly speak in big groups. My Dh would feel bad why she is not accepting. I had no answer. Its just the way she is. After many years my mom will have small conversations with dh and i leave it for them to figure out.

 

Just let him be. Obviously that is his nature. It is no use forcing to be very social with your parents if it does not come naturally. The good thing is he does laugh and talk to them. Maybe with time he might be more at ease with them. So long as he does not behave nasty to them or foul mouth them, I don't think you should worry too much about it.

 

I agree with all that the ladies have mentioned above. And as long as he has a good relationship with them, you don't bother about it too much. You keeping things good with your in-laws is more important. So hope you work it out.

After reading your post I got reminded of the situation in my own house. When ever my parents feel like talking to him, they call him..Its as simple as that. He is usually polite enough to talk to them at that time. Otherwise I know for a fact he'll never bother getting in touch..but it need not bother our current state of mind.

 

Hi Klniha,

I am sailing in the same boat as urs. My H too does not talk and mingle with my parents much. But, my ILs keep calling us everyday. He speaks to them for long and ofcourse, I too have to talk to them daily whether or not I have anything in specific to speak I felt very bad initially and I let him go on his own. But, as days rolled over, this kind of differential treatment between two parents only made me more unhappy. Finally, I spoke to him about this one day and told him how I feel. Now, every weekend when he is at home, I call my parents and ask him to speak with them a few words . Though he does not talk much and everything is very formal, atleast I am happy that he spoke and my parents too are happy Hoping he will get closer to them with time.

 

What does DH mean? Distinguished Husband?

 

LOL! DH == dear husband