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How To Surmount This Problem?

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by adisum, Mar 18, 2019.

  1. Rihana

    Rihana Finest Post Winner

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    You make the effort because it is in your best interest. You use all that you have listed to your advantage. For now, let your parents handle the insults she dished out to them. "Not talking to you", "don't bother if you are there are not" -- these can be turned around to be of good use to you while you also "work on the relationship" as your husband wants you to. You can define what "work on relationship" means. It is like a parent tells a child to "clean the room" without defining exactly what a clean room means. The smart child will come up with his definition, make it a reasonable one, and show that he made sufficient effort without breaking a sweat.
     
    Afresh and Laks09 like this.
  2. yellowmango

    yellowmango IL Hall of Fame

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    No you are not wrong .
    But that is not the way your husband thinks .

    Like others have said....
    Stay respectfully polite to mil.
    Avoid her when husband is not around.
    When husband is around, do basic interaction making sure he notices.
    If he expects you to do more...remind him you have tried but one needs two hands to clap . Taali ek haath se nahi bajti ...keep telling him you have put your hand out many times. Then change the topic.

    If your husband ever comes to your side of thinking in future,then you can broach the topic of seperate living arrangement .....even if it is in the same house.
    Till then you will have to become smart.

    Another effort you have to make is to not get too effected by his getting upset. He is not God .
    Does he get effected by you getting upset.
    Don't give him the power to hurt you emotionally.
    Let him shout ,you be calm and think some mad person is shouting .
    Try to get mentally and emotionally stronger.
    His ability to hurt you emotionally is a weapon he uses. Slowly take that weapon away from him.

    Soon you will know if he has any love for you .
    That will help you take your future decisions . Till then don't plan a baby.

    Stay strong
    Best wishes.
     
    KashmirFlower and Afresh like this.

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