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How To Shut Up And Focus

Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by sarvantaryamini, Feb 15, 2020.

  1. sarvantaryamini

    sarvantaryamini Gold IL'ite

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    Yes, instead of a voice record, I tried to keep on online diary, although I wasn't regular at it. Maybe I need to resume that and make it a habit.
     
  2. sarvantaryamini

    sarvantaryamini Gold IL'ite

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    ha ha :tearsofjoy:
     
  3. sarvantaryamini

    sarvantaryamini Gold IL'ite

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    I used to do that too and it used to work for me. I was that person who never lost sleep on things. Literally. I used to be scared, anxious, but at the end of the day, the next morning, I was a calmer person. I think the same as what you mentioned, and that's why this post. Why the doubt? Why the deadlock situation? I have my flaws because of which I am suffering. TBH, God has been really kind to me, yet the feeling of unhappiness. Problem is within me - I feel frustrated at my inability to network with others, communicate. I am not at all motivated. I don't have passion, just needs.

    Just have to pull up my socks and keep the unnecessary, unproductive thoughts from mind. I have to ignore that noise in my mind.
     
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  4. sarvantaryamini

    sarvantaryamini Gold IL'ite

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    @mangaii, I am also geared towards what you are saying, but probably not completely. I feel frustrated at certain things, why are they happening and why can't I give back? What am I doing? I know a silent and heartfelt prayer is enough. But the mind is so disturbed, I don't even know what to pray for nowadays. Peace of mind? Intelligence? Smartness? Money? Just being a good person? Being a good parent? Being a good spouse? Being a good daughter? What do I want? I don't know honestly.
     
    Last edited: Feb 19, 2020
  5. sarvantaryamini

    sarvantaryamini Gold IL'ite

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    Completely agree with you on this. Acceptance. The biggest part. Perhaps this is where I am failing time and again. Refusal to accept the truth, to let go of desires. And yet when I have finally just accepted, things just closed by themselves and I got a new set of issues :)
     
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  6. sarvantaryamini

    sarvantaryamini Gold IL'ite

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    Exactly, it is the surprise factor that is wearing me down.
     
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  7. sarvantaryamini

    sarvantaryamini Gold IL'ite

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    I have been doing 3, and I regret doing it, I want to stop it. If I confide/vent to family or for that matter anyone, to begin with I get free judgement and free advice. Another thing is, if the other person really wants me to be happy, all they feel is sorrow and unhappiness, I feel like I am distributing my personal garbage and the stench is spreading to their lives. I am sick of this habit and I definitely don't want to do it anymore. But the mind keeps acting like a monkey. I have been suggested point 4 by people, I might even consider sometime in the future, although it is again a lot of work because of my personal situation. I don't think anyone in my family will support this option and I can't do it in utter secrecy unfortunately.

    Good point you raised in 5, maybe that's the mark of successful people, they don't vent, they just channel it on something productive and they are very good at it. That's what I want to do too, but then I am human, venting gives immense but short term relief. To keep it in is so hard, especially in a group of people.
     
  8. sarvantaryamini

    sarvantaryamini Gold IL'ite

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    Finally, I want to sum it up. You have all given really good suggestions. Maybe the reason I am suffering is -

    a. Inability to take a decision
    b. After deciding, I implement way too late
    c. I think too much about consequences, so much so I drop the idea altogether.
    d. I am a pathetic listener.
    e. I think negative, I should stop that.
    f. I am not comfortable around people, but I want company, I prefer the company of few close people instead of many people.
    g. I am claustrophobic.
    h. I get scared easily, because of overthinking. I suffer from anxiety.
    i. Overthinking and anxiousness runs in the family. But definitely not indecisiveness. Fear and indecisiveness maybe is unique to me.
    j. I have to stop taking and start giving.
     
    Last edited: Feb 19, 2020
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  9. Roar

    Roar Gold IL'ite

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    I am too on the same journey @sarvantaryamini ... just keep on it and dont let go. We are conditioned and brought up in some traits but making a conscious effort to better ourselves will sure bring us peace and calm and ergo joy.

    Lets do it :)
     
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  10. AmulB

    AmulB Silver IL'ite

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    Lol
     

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