How To Deal When Teacher Complains About Your Kid

pumpkin01 · Jun 14, 2016

It might be a stupid question but I am bit disturbed as today when I went to drop my son his class teacher reminded me to make my son finish his Home works, this she had told to my hubby when she saw my hubby last week and since after we are trying to make him sit and finish his homework. We don't pressure him for study he's just in LKG and at this young age there are other things apart from only studying we believe...I mean we have tried few times and it's just a pressure on him to make him finish his homework...

He's good in reading writing, he has already done those works though.....i know in India schools are like this but still I am unable to digest why to pressurize kids....She is a temporary teacher as their class teacher went for an operation so I feel she is trying to follow all rules I guess ?

Please help me am I just reacting too much or is she right and we make our son finish his homeworks but what about the times when he's not in a mood ??

pumpkin01 · Jun 14, 2016

wow, so many views but no reply... why ladies?? please pour your advice. thanks in advance.

Priya4oct · Jun 14, 2016

How much is home work..if it is 1 page ..I feel you should get it completed. My daughter did LKG (Pre K 4) in USA and she was also getting home work , just one page of writing or mix and match or pasting pic of objects from specific alphabet.

Normally teachers give home work so that kids can practice writing and they do not get pressure in higher standard.

Instead of pressurizing your kid and completing whole home work in one shot you can ask your kid to complete 1-2 lines then some play time and again 1-2 lines. We still do this for our daughter who is in 1st standard. Now instead of line it's subject..Like 1 subject once we reach home then have some play time or dinner time..then another subject. She never get bored of writing.

deeprapriya · Jun 14, 2016

Yes, I agree with the other IL.... Even my daughter gets one page home work on week days and two page home work on weekends.... she was in LKG last year.... I also struggled a lot to make her do the work... I followed few tips given by fellow Ilites...

Appreciate your son even if he writes one letter in the home work. Encourage him to write and then to play. Mostly I switch off the tv.... Later it became a routine. I will not ask about home work immediately after reaching home.... will let her play for some time and I will play with her for some time...After that, I will start....

pumpkin01 · Jun 14, 2016

Priya4oct said: ↑

How much is home work..if it is 1 page ..I feel you should get it completed. My daughter did LKG (Pre K 4) in USA and she was also getting home work , just one page of writing or mix and match or pasting pic of objects from specific alphabet.

Normally teachers give home work so that kids can practice writing and they do not get pressure in higher standard.

Instead of pressurizing your kid and completing whole home work in one shot you can ask your kid to complete 1-2 lines then some play time and again 1-2 lines. We still do this for our daughter who is in 1st standard. Now instead of line it's subject..Like 1 subject once we reach home then have some play time or dinner time..then another subject. She never get bored of writing.
Click to expand...

Thanks @Priya4oct, yes they are mostly 1 pages or 2 pages.... the things is my son likes to read but when it comes to writing he doesn't find it intresting as much we have guessed...everytime we have to make it fun or give challenge like can you finish while I am counting 10/20....we want him to take his own time to improve his interest which he has definitely improved a lot compared to last year.

The other thing which really irritated me is the same thing she told my hubby last week the moment she saw him, his visit to school was for something else , if you know what i mean when you have a meeting and tell then it's different thing.

pumpkin01 · Jun 14, 2016

deeprapriya said: ↑

Yes, I agree with the other IL.... Even my daughter gets one page home work on week days and two page home work on weekends.... she was in LKG last year.... I also struggled a lot to make her do the work... I followed few tips given by fellow Ilites...

Appreciate your son even if he writes one letter in the home work. Encourage him to write and then to play. Mostly I switch off the tv.... Later it became a routine. I will not ask about home work immediately after reaching home.... will let her play for some time and I will play with her for some time...After that, I will start....
Click to expand...

Thanks @deeprapriya for the reply, yes we are encouraging him but he is not finding it challenging/interesting...you are right we have to make a routine for him..... we make him sit in the evening but kids are kids .... if you are playing they would need more play rather than sitting and reading/writing

But my point was is it really so important that the teacher asked the same thing twice

Priya4oct · Jun 15, 2016

OP,
Just put yourshelf in teacher shoe, she didnt tell you next day it was after a week. She might have told this again after seeing no change. It's similar that we parent tell to teacher if we dont see any change (like I am following up with my DD's hindi teacher from last two weeks on teaching alphabets not words directly as there are many kids who doesnt recognize hindi alphabet including my DD and teacher started directly of word formation. I request her this every other day whenever I see her in school because she is still asking kids to write words directly).

Dont get irritated or take otherwise as it is for your kid only.
I want to share an example of my neighbor whose DD is in my dds class , 1st std. Her DD doesnt want to write any thing even now in 1st standard. Teacher ask her every day to write but she never do. everyday come with blank note book and say I dont like to write. Her mother had tried all the way without any luck . Reason what I can guess from this is, her mother never asked to write any thing in pre primary classes (this is what she told me). She was asking once or twice but if DD was not writing she never minded. It happened for 2 years and now her DD doesnt want to do writing and might be thinking that this year will also pass like previous years.

This is just an example not to scare you.

butterflyice · Jun 15, 2016

@pumpkin01, how old is your kid? 3 or 4 years old right? A 3 or a 4 year old's muscles are not developed enough to write. There are kids that are forced to write, it doesn't mean they are ready for that. Your parenting instincts are right on. Do help your kiddo work up those muscles. Let him play with mud, sand, play dough, roll chapatis with you, help you make rangolis, paint and doodle, cut paper and stick. Writing will come when he is ready. There is tons of research which shows that kids esp boys are not ready to write that young.

Seek an appointment with the teacher and mention its against your parenting philosophy as well as best childhood practices to force a 4 year old to write and finish homework. Ask her if he can finish the homework in alternate methods. Don't worry too much if she refuses. See how it goes once the regular teacher comes back.

pumpkin01 · Jun 15, 2016

Priya4oct said: ↑

OP,
Just put yourshelf in teacher shoe, she didnt tell you next day it was after a week. She might have told this again after seeing no change. It's similar that we parent tell to teacher if we dont see any change (like I am following up with my DD's hindi teacher from last two weeks on teaching alphabets not words directly as there are many kids who doesnt recognize hindi alphabet including my DD and teacher started directly of word formation. I request her this every other day whenever I see her in school because she is still asking kids to write words directly).

Dont get irritated or take otherwise as it is for your kid only.
I want to share an example of my neighbor whose DD is in my dds class , 1st std. Her DD doesnt want to write any thing even now in 1st standard. Teacher ask her every day to write but she never do. everyday come with blank note book and say I dont like to write. Her mother had tried all the way without any luck . Reason what I can guess from this is, her mother never asked to write any thing in pre primary classes (this is what she told me). She was asking once or twice but if DD was not writing she never minded. It happened for 2 years and now her DD doesnt want to do writing and might be thinking that this year will also pass like previous years.

This is just an example not to scare you.
Click to expand...

After she told my hubby we have made sure to finish his homework but still she asked me about the same thing. But you are right that our son does need improvement in the writing skill but it's a pressure on him when he doesn't want to write.

For example yesterday she gave homework for (13th and 14th, yes she didn't give any notebook on 13th ) so he had to write 4 pages after maths 2 pages he was simply not concentrating anymore writing... so I couldn't pressurize him a lot to finish.

We are scared and worried at the same time how to improve his writing skill but pressurising him won't solve the problem.

Laks09 · Jun 15, 2016

OP - To get your child to write and have a life long interest in writing there is one thing and only one thing you should do. Do not pressurize your 3/4/5/6 yrs old to write. Same applies to reading/math etc. writing should be fun something that's done on sand or atta or rice.
Unless the child has a motor skills deficit the child will write decently by 6/7 yrs.

I think you are doing the right thing. I did the same with mine. I have had a similar situation in India with my dd's writing and hand writing. I told the teacher that it doesn't matter and she will write only the amount I think is appropriate. As long as all her other skills are at par, I really don't care about writing. Fast forward many years, I found out yesterday that my DD is top of class. Honors high schooler with no academic deficits. So much so for not writing and not copy writing when she was five.