1. How to Build Positivity in Married Life? : Click Here
    Dismiss Notice

How Do I Say No

Discussion in 'Friends & Neighbours' started by Vedhavalli, Oct 12, 2019.

  1. Vedhavalli

    Vedhavalli Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    905
    Likes Received:
    1,364
    Trophy Points:
    263
    Gender:
    Female
    I have a good friend, she wants to teache her son native language. She doesn't know to read/write only speak that language.
    I told her he can join in the classes which my dd goes. Friend says no the timing doesn't work for her. Asking me to teach her son.
    I couldn't say No straight. (I'm still working on saying no to all)
    I told her if I have time , I will.
    Since my dd goes to class, I don't have to spend much time for it.
    Crux of to the issue is she wants to teach me on weekends, which is totally impossible for me. Weekdays she can't come as her son has classes.

    How do I say no ? In a polite way.
     
  2. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    12,969
    Likes Received:
    20,846
    Trophy Points:
    538
    Gender:
    Female
    Why can’t your friend teach her kid the native language?

    you yourself are putting your DD classes.How can your friend expect this?

    Tell her laughingly” I myself put my DD in classes as I really have no time dear.
    Otherwise I will be teaching my girl
    Right?Also,the reason I put DD during weekdays as we want to have our family time during weekends”

    Any decent friend will surely understand.
     
    Meghaa, BhumiBabe, periamma and 5 others like this.
  3. Vedhavalli

    Vedhavalli Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    905
    Likes Received:
    1,364
    Trophy Points:
    263
    Gender:
    Female
    She doesn't know to read write the language, she knows only to speak . I told her she can put her kid in my dd classes. She says timings doesn't work out.
    I have told her similar to your lines.
     
    gknew, anika987 and Sunshine04 like this.
  4. Sunshine04

    Sunshine04 Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    2,117
    Likes Received:
    2,686
    Trophy Points:
    283
    Gender:
    Female
    Good
    Just keep repeating the same lines .
     
  5. SpringB

    SpringB Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    832
    Likes Received:
    3,209
    Trophy Points:
    265
    Gender:
    Female
    ask her to try next year. Also better for her to learn along with the child as child might need help with homework. Pass the buck to her
     
  6. Anusha2917

    Anusha2917 IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    2,575
    Likes Received:
    7,022
    Trophy Points:
    408
    Gender:
    Female
    I don't know this one made me laugh. As in a big smile. :grinning::grinning:

    As they say repeat the lines like a parrot.

    OP saying No is never easy but if saying that difficult NO helps you then say it somehow..

    Anika's lines are simple and I liked it but since you have tried and hasn't worked I would suggest tell your friend directly that it's not possible for you to teach her son . :nomouth:

    She will not question you further. If she does then tell her it's not possible because of the reasons you have stated above. :)
     
  7. shravs3

    shravs3 IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    3,207
    Likes Received:
    5,845
    Trophy Points:
    425
    Gender:
    Female
    If the kid can’t goto classes, online there are some websites which provides some basic language training.
    She can refer them and in that way both of them can learn together.
     
  8. virtualkv2020

    virtualkv2020 Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    818
    Likes Received:
    1,158
    Trophy Points:
    295
    Gender:
    Female
    A final nail in the coffin would be to quote a very high price to baby sit her child, feed the child with home cooked food and to teach the child on a on 1 on 1 basis ;)
     
    Amica, gknew, Anusha2917 and 2 others like this.
  9. Sunshine04

    Sunshine04 Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    2,117
    Likes Received:
    2,686
    Trophy Points:
    283
    Gender:
    Female
    Oh yeah. Even if she agrees ,op could make some income as well
     
    Anusha2917 and virtualkv2020 like this.
  10. kaluputti

    kaluputti Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    1,151
    Likes Received:
    572
    Trophy Points:
    208
    Gender:
    Female
    I am amused ....by the question itself intially....first find out why you cant say 'no'...must be
    1. you have two minds to say 'yes/no' i.e.you want to teach/earn but not this
    2. too polite to refuse
    3. u want to escape the issue but not solve, which you know will be recurring and bothering you as well as your friend.
    By avoiding, you are misleading someone by giving a false hope, which in turn may affect your friendship, the very fact for which you cant say 'no'. Why cant you say the truth in a polite manner and face it? Better to be honest and face facts . You will gain a more understanding friendship.
     
    Anusha2917 likes this.

Share This Page