Help my mind..

goodluck,

when you have such a positive id, why do you think negative.. he had a love affair.. so what? love is a beautiful feeling and be happy that it had happened to him.. guys get uncomfortable if we ask about their past.. may be he is preserving that memory and now if you keep asking him, it might spoil all those memories..

each person evolve time to time.. are you the same person as 5 or 6 years before? you change.. and evolve.. so your husband has evolved to a different person.. the guy who was in love is a different facet of him.. why do you worry about it..

Yes.. First love will always be there in one's mind.. so what? Guys love their mom's first.. as wives we can't ignore that fact right. we just have to accept it.. now that he is married, he has whole heartedly given his love for you.. you must be happy for that..

You / me and everyone have done lot of mistakes. Can we live each minute thinking about the past. We have to live now. This minute. So let go his past and let go your past worry. From now on, be happy and love him unconditionally. Good Luck !

I always nag my husband if he had any past love. He didn't have any, he says that way. But I am very open with him and used to tell him, if he had any story he must tell me. I just consider him as my friend too so it wont affect me in a negative way. I would scold him why he didn't have any past love because it is a very normal feeling to get attracted to opposite sex and only if you have some problem you can't like opposite sex. I will even ask him to cook up some imaginary love story and tell. But he will feel bored and pass it. Just take it for fun and move on..

 

What happened before marriage is not your concern, you should be bothered about the present only.
Generally wifes are concerned about current EMAs and not past affairs.

 

just let go........ it happened so long ago.....even before you and your hubby knew each other.don't let his 'past' ruin your 'present '.

 

Every woman feels as if she owns her husband. You are having some kind of jealous feeling that you want too be ur husband's first and last love. You are not able to digest what he told.

In short i have only one thing to say. You had won one of the most caring and loving husband. You should be proud. Your husbands X-Girl Friend failed to win her love.

It all matters at the end who had won. You won, so you should be proud. Just remove all these thoughts from your brain. Please dont hurt your self and dont hurt your hubby.

If you still have something, keep it to your self. Dont spoil his mood by asking him about her. It will spoil your relationship if you keep on making him recall about his past love. Just do as I say.

 

He seem to have moved on. But you are the one who is refusing to move on. Your Dh would have by this time understood that it was just an attraction. Whatever he has for you is love. Instead of enjoying it you are stressing yourself with unnecessary thoughts. Don't you think it will affect him even more.

How many days/weeks you would have wasted on talking about this? Can you ever get back those days again? She on the other hand will be enjoying her life. It is you, who is unhappy now. Your DH might feel guilty initially, might offer consoling words, later he'll get irritated and annoyed. He will shout and you will shout back, unnecessary fights.
Enjoy your life now. Do not invite problems. Life is a blessing. Live your life to the fullest!!
All the best!!!
If you find it difficult to stop thinking about her, then keep yourself busy. You can move on easily. Get some funny,cheerful friends, have fun. You will move on. Promise yourself that you will not talk about her to your DH. From now on try to be cheerful and happy!!

 

You are making your husband feel guilty every time you ask him such things. Don't judge him for something that he did before he met you. At this point,he loves you and doesn't even want to look at that lady's face. Your husband is a very good hearted man. Everyone makes mistakes, but very few are those who own up to them. Just forget all this nonsense and get on with your life. Don't make him lose his patience. This constant questioning will create distances between the both of you.

 

Hiiiii................Ask any one in love (married or committed)that would they like to go back to their first love ....THE ANSWER WOULD BE NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.........reason (ex)If sumone ask u to go to the farm and look for an apple big and round apple and assume that u dont know what apple is? (like what it is and what do we do with it)and u can only see all apple one by one and u cannot turn back and take the one u saw before so lets assume ..when u go to the farm the first apple u pick is green ,round and shiny and u learned ok this is called apple if u like it u pik it and cannot search for more so its a human tendency is to look for a thing and invest time in it when they dont know what is it and continue if u decided that i will go ahead and look for some more then the 2nd apple is red ,shiny ,sweet and tasty and then u realised that u like this one so the moral is First love is love that come to us and we find what love is how it feels because we dont know anythng abt it that time but true love is after realising what it is u make a choice that what i want ................so u r what he wanted and she was when he didnt know wht he is getting into so be happy

 

You seem to be bent on creating trouble for yourself. So be it. There is no cure for a doubting mind. Only when you create a trouble as a result of these useless actions only when it really happens will you understand and repent your actions.

 

What do you mean by 'My mind is not convinced" ? If he still has a relationship with the other girl, you have a right to complain. His brain is not a computer hard drive that he can wipe out everything old and reboot once he gets married to you. Ofcourse he will remember his past and will have good memories of his first love. Let him cherish those memories and help him look beyond those memories.
Dont worry about being dusky, it is a myth the men only find fair women attractive. What matters, at least to me, is elegance more than color of skin. I would be more worried about your mind which seems to be too possessive about someone it loves. Let him be free and be free yourself.