I'm back.... Great. I thought I was done with all this, but I do have another question for all of you. My in-laws have been living with me, for the past 6 months, and despite everything, I have no problem with them. My husband, occasionally tries to fix our marriage, but it's always a slippery slope with him, because there's always a problem that disturbs him, and ends saying things like "if you change, everything will be fine" or "listen to what I say, or you should leave". Throughout this time, I gave my honest attempt to fix the marriage, though, my interest toward my husband has definitely decreased. And I don't mean just physically - I have ignored his negative words and scolding so much, that I have started ignoring him, all of him as a person. This is definitely not good for a healthy marriage, and I recognize it, so I mentally decided that I want a divorce, and started planning and preparing accordingly. (my parents are onboard) When I tried to start the conversation of our marriage (not divorce, mind you) with my husband (and his family and my parents), it seemed to explode and seemed like there was no resolution. Basically, my husband and his family, believe there are no issues with this marriage that time will not extinguish. My parents and I felt like there was enough issues that it's only going to repeat, again and again, yearly (because that's what happens). But, somehow, what I said must have lit the fire under my husband's butt, because now he seems to be trying to return to my good graces and surprisingly, was polite to my parents for the past 24 hours. And this isn't the only thing. I feel really sorry for my in-laws, because they genuinely believe that things will just get better in 10-15 years, and they are old and physically suffering and they are away from their home in India (where there's a lot of things that are going on that make them super anxious). So, I am at this weird place where I am physically feeling guilty (nausea, migraine, anxiety attacks) for wanting a divorce, because I don't believe that our marriage will improve. I honestly feel like I will resent my life, if I stayed here. But at the same time, there's a lot of people (husband, son, inlaws) who will be surprised and hurt by my initiation. The real question is not about whether I should get a divorce or not, that's on me. But for those who have divorced, how did you deal with the guilt? I feel really bad for hiding everything, and portraying a fake face, until I get my bearings. Clearly, everything would be easier if my in-laws weren't here, but I also want to do this with them here, so that my husband has support. It feels unsporting to leave him alone.