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Fight with MIL..husband too thinks I play games..

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by sheel, Oct 14, 2013.

  1. sheel

    sheel Bronze IL'ite

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    Hello Friends..

    I do not share a healthy relationship with my inlaws though we stay together as my DH is the only son.Earlier we used to have lot of fights..I used to back talk..but I stooped doing it and instead followed ignore mantra ..I used to get hurt seldom but didn't use to tell anyone..my mil tells evryonw e got a bad DIL..she is seperating us ...et ect..

    Yesterday my MIL was making breakfats and I was doing other household works..My MIL asked me whether to cook for me and my DH or not..I told her cook paranthas half ..I will cook it and make it ready later...after 15mins my DH started making paranthas..and I went to dry clothes..now behind me..my dh might have scolded my mil that why did not she cook for us..I came down and she was shouting tell your husband that yo told me..I told him same...now he got angry with me..that why i told this to her..i told so tht we can eat hot..

    later today my mil was telling my sil about this story..as my sil kid was at out home tht time..and he might have told at home..Now my mil started saying bad words about me..when I was just sitting next to her..that I make them fight..I am bad..I am seperating..I will too realize..my mistake..its their karm they got abad bahu..

    I was just listening..later on on some incident she told me why dont you speak to me..I said I cant speak to person who talks bad about me..she was gaian speaking bad about me..I just told her..keep quiet...dont speak anything with me..else something bad will happen as I was feeling very bad..

    meanwhile i was simply talking to my husband on chat and casually told him that mil is backbitching about me to sil..Even he felt I am wrong..He said you play games..etc etc..

    later afternoon around 3 My MIL asked if I have to have lunch..because normally i cook by 1:30 but I was in no mood..I said i dont want to eat..she was again saying something..I said dont fight with me..I simply locked them from inside..and was ran away from home..as I simply want to be out of house..but then my kids were screaoing and I came back..

    She called my DH and complained ...My DH was like..this is now your natak..what do you want..I told him I cant hear taunts anymore..But still he is not ready to seperate..Instead he starts crying,,,and I am back again with the same issues..drama..

    Please suggst what should I do
     
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  2. gurpreetsingh

    gurpreetsingh Gold IL'ite

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    Hi ,
    Paranthas have caused such a big issue . It is because ils are idle and want to create issue with anything and everything .
    When ils talk bad or scold me , i act as if i m not the person that she is referrring and I stare at wall or speak with my friends in a happy tone. It irritates her .. but she cannot create issue out of it..
    More than argument ,sometimes being indifferent can be much better in ur case i feel .. Just neglect and ignore ...
     
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  3. Coolchap

    Coolchap New IL'ite

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    Last edited: Oct 14, 2013
    2 people like this.
  4. anugamit

    anugamit Platinum IL'ite

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    Thats a really really cute talented girl. Loved it.

    Dear OP,

    Do NOT complain to your DH. Its of no use. You are already dealing with your MIL your way. Vent out in this thread http://www.indusladies.com/forums/relationship-with-in-laws/209626-it-happens-only-lawss-house.html.. Next time, tell her to cook for your DH at least.

    Best of luck

    p.s.: Sis, we are from same boat. :)
     
  5. Coolchap

    Coolchap New IL'ite

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  6. sadwife

    sadwife Gold IL'ite

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    Tell your MIL yes can't help it, she got a bad DIL because of her own bad karma so she has to face it now. Stop complaining about her to your husband. You too play smart. Be neutral to her when your husband is around. Give her left and right when she is alone and act innocent when your husband is back. Hopefully your husband starts to think his mother is the real culprit.
     
  7. ppriya182010

    ppriya182010 Gold IL'ite

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    First thing stop complaining about your inlaws to DH. Never never works! Especially when you are all living together. He is never going to take your side.

    When MIL shouts, just say to yourself, "if dogs bark at us, we dont bark back", we simply walk away. So simply go into your room with your kid and take rest. If you feel like talking to someone closely, just talk to your parents/siblings/friends in your leisure time and be happy. Basically shut her down from your life emotional! For most Indian wives, this is the only solutions that works.
     

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