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Feeling Awkward

Discussion in 'Friends & Neighbours' started by SGBV, Jan 9, 2017.

  1. SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

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    [QUOTE="WorriesTooMuch, post: 3928019, Any decent person would have mentioned it in passing so you are not embarrassed. For example he could have casually mentioned "I have serious vision issues so people always think I'm moody or angry because it looks like I keep staring at them."

    That conveys the point without drawing attention to what you were wearing, which I think is very inappropriate subject matter in the workplace, especially in an supervisor-employee setting.[/QUOTE]

    Exactly.. This is my worry...
     
  2. anika987

    anika987 Platinum IL'ite

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    Why did he mention it particularly today?He does not have any vision problems or even if he does,it seems like he was noticing you
     
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  3. suasin

    suasin Silver IL'ite

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    The pics dont do justice.. The midriff is almost bare xcept in the middle.. In fact, its rated in the top five 'hottest' uniforms.. I would say, definitely awkward n thats why I specifically asked.. I was trying to get to the awkward part, not excusing his staring..
     
    Last edited: Jan 10, 2017
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  4. JustAnotherMom

    JustAnotherMom Platinum IL'ite

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    Same suggestion as YM.

    Today, I learned srilankns wear saree differently and learned how to wear it too( thanks youtube). Will try it on my one of these coming days.
    You can try wearing Bengal cotton sarees. Buy Bengal Handloom Sarees ( Or any cotton saree) They look very professional. Takes a little while to master in wearing them as they are little stiff. When I wear saree( in south indian style) I, pull and pin the saree with blouse on the left hand side, so i would keep my back side( between the blouse and skirt ) and side part of stomach covered all the time.
     
    Last edited: Jan 10, 2017
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  5. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Means? Near the left shoulder, on the top, close to the blouse material 's edge, 2-3 inches from a necklace, many of us use a pin that serves double purpose of holding the pallu's pleats together and also secures the pallu (and saree) to the blouse. Are you talking about that pin? If yes, how does that cover the back and side?

    Hopefully SGBV won't mind a side discussion on saree pins placement. : ) I actually squinted and looked sideways to check the 2-3 inches approximation. : )
     
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  6. hermitcrab

    hermitcrab Gold IL'ite

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    SGBV
    You must be looking good in saree. You should wear it more often on date nights.
    Ignore that guy. Sometimes guys stare, and yes, in some cases, it is hard for them to control, just biology.
     
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  7. suasin

    suasin Silver IL'ite

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    No, I think she means near the left hip, you know the edge that you take from the front pleat, bring it arnd to make the pallu? Some of us take the edge n pin to the bottom of the blouse.. That way, midriff is covered but you risk tearing the saree..

    Hope not, my next qs is if they go for a particular pattern n length of saree for that style.. Like both side border is really necessary?
     
    Last edited: Jan 10, 2017
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  8. JustAnotherMom

    JustAnotherMom Platinum IL'ite

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    Attaching an image for reference. Jo.jpg
     
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  9. WorriesTooMuch

    WorriesTooMuch Senior IL'ite

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    Ew I hate men like this with a passion, pretending to be a gentleman and whatnot. If he ever does it again, tell him calmly and firmly that you accept his 'apology' but there's no need to keep repeating it- you're not deaf or slow to understand. And change the topic.
     
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  10. beautifullife30

    beautifullife30 Platinum IL'ite

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    hey @SGBV

    This guilt feeling that 'you did something that you shouldn't have' is exactly what these crooks try to achieve.

    To overcome that feeling, have confidence in yourself. Know that there is nothing wrong is whatever you did. Even if is correcting or adjusting.

    I am sure, you would have unconsciously tried to correct or set things in a saree. in fact, everyone who doesn't wear a saree often does that.

    That guy probably has an inflated ego. So he is under the impression that it is he who is making you feel something or made you do something!

    So, the next time someone says something like this, just smile a condescending smile and say 'oh..don't worry! its not you! I am just a conscious person. That's all! in fact I hardly noticed you staring.'

    That should put him in place. if he still persists, always fall back on that age old relation trick of relating him to a long lost brother or a great grand father....

    But I repeat again, please have confidence in yourself. As long as YOU lack confidence, these crooks are going take you on a rollercoaster ride.
     
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