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Education = Empowerment, Illiteracy = Vulnerability? Think again!

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by satchitananda, Dec 26, 2013.

  1. satchitananda

    satchitananda IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Shyamala,

    Sure, there are also men like this. I cannot comment about this particular case, but think of a situation where the husband and wife are miserable, one wants to get out but the other insists on holding the marriage together for he sake of the child. Would the partner wanting to leave find it stifling? Would the child be happy seeing both the parents unhappy? Certainly raises a lot of questions.

     
  2. kkrish

    kkrish IL Hall of Fame

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    Hey, hey, hey Sats.
    no,no,no.... Don't even remotely bring yourself here.

    What I mentioned was just a hypothetical character, and ONLY for discussion sake.

    As for lazy people, the other day my YS gave a new dimension... They are the ones who come up with new gadgets to simplify work. So nothing wrong in being one. I am lazy too.
     
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  3. satchitananda

    satchitananda IL Hall of Fame

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    Hi Kamala,

    I know your example was hypothetical. However, I have to honestly admit, hand on my heart, I do wonder from time to time what purpose I serve around me except gas online! :hide: As for laziness, I guess three years of having help around the house has gotten me into a state of inertia, which I am trying really hard to snap out of.

    LOL. That's a good one. :thumbsup
     
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  4. RADIODOC679

    RADIODOC679 Gold IL'ite

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    HAs got something to do about our repressive society as well-How muchever a lady is educated-dr,mba etc...she is being fed the gumpton soup of pati-parmeshwar etc..(well not anymore-see the soaring rates of divorces in the present generation as compared to a decade ago)-what will x think-what will y think??how will we show face to relatives-Yes relatives come show face eat smabar & get lost after that its your face ,your daughter's face that matters-When our people realize this none of this would happen-Also whtaver be the reason stigma of divorce hangs like a unwashable stain on a woman,wheras the guy is just another returned bachelor!!!!Who wants stigma?how many can stand up daily against snide remarks-Now sexual harassment(you are single-& available-so men have all the right to leer,steerr etc...also since you are divorced-u must be characterless too!!!!)SOunds a lot more safer & saner to stick to a unhappy family-(not my personnal opinion though).Unless we ourselves become liberated as a society,look people as not x---wife -w...divorcee-z--characterless such double standards are bound to continue-There are very few parents who have themselves been liberated & bring up wonderful children with less forced morals and much lesser fed pseudo morals-rest of us ofcourse are less fortunate-
    And the maids -they live at a different level-daily existence-fight till they discover its not worth,it-are unafriad to leave or be left!!!
     
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  5. satchitananda

    satchitananda IL Hall of Fame

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    That is the crux of the problem Radiodoc. "Society" starts with "us" as individuals. When women or their families are afraid of "what will society say", what they don't remember is that change can only start with themselves. Nobody is going to give them their rights on a platter.
     
  6. Kamla

    Kamla IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Satchi,

    What do I say to you now! I came here fashionably late (!!!) and read through not only your original post, but the whole thread and now I am not quite sure what the original post was all about! gigglingsmiley

    Kamala has rightly called it a 'general' discussion thread which it is and what a discussion! After reading everyone's input, there is nothing much more to add on. Every aspect of marriage, partnership, society pressures, family's pride, feminism, not so feminism, education, empowerment...all has been discussed almost threadbare! Nothing much can be added to it and even if I do add, nothing much will be changing either in the situation of your maid WF or in the situation of a person who will hang on to a hopeless marriage whatever her/his reasons may be for doing so...okay, mainly her for we are majorly discussing the woman's viewpoint....

    I would like to add that even if Kamala's infidel wife was only hypothetical, there are true cases too! Long ago, read how famous RaviShankar's wife openly wrote that she was having an affair with the maestro and her husband was fully aware of it and did not question her and wanted to continue the marriage and even accepted her baby through RS as his. She too was totally aware of the many affairs of RS and still did not mind being his lover.....Example of people who had fame, money, education and success to boot. Then on my visits to India, our daughters always befriended the maids and learnt about their whole life stories in spite of the language barrier!! As far as I am aware, most of them lived life with quite an abandon..husbands married more than once and the maids themselves did not shy away from affairs and had someone else's babies, they drank and smoked too at times and so on so forth. Reminded us of life in the western world!! No taboos, no hanging on to hard and fast rules. It is clearly the middle classes who seem to carry on the onus of 'what the society thinks'! I agree I tend to generalize, but that's the way the story goes....!

    In our country where the daughters are rolling out PHDs on one hand and yet taught to cook for the men folk, breaking away from the age old beliefs and norms is going to be an Herculean task....See, even the adjective here is masculine!!

    Well, you are right when you say-- "Wow! Here is a topic for a full-fledged Ph.D in the Indian context. :-D"--For, I think so too!

    Oh, let me finish!! Congratulations for getting nominated to FP and thanks goes to Viswamitra!!

    L, Kamla
     
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  7. satchitananda

    satchitananda IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Kamla,

    Nice to see you here even if "fashionably late". :-D As you said, the topic has really been discussed threadbare and has tended to veer away from the main point, but then no aspect is totally independent of the other - hence, I guess it was only inevitable.

    It's been good to have everyone come and chip into the discussion.

    Thanks to Viswamitra for nominating the thread. :)
     
  8. As many members like Balajee have pointed out, it is common in lower socio-economic group, for a wife to throw the husband out of the house physically. 'Not bothering about what others will think of me', this pressure is absolutely not there.
     
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  9. I understand, 'DH' means Darling Husband, what is 'BH' ?
     
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  10. 'Education level of men' and 'Domestic violence' have absolutely no connection, in my opinion. Once I was seeing a program called 'extra-time' in BBC. It is a 15 minutes program highlighting one single social issue. The program was comparing the education of level of men and their violent behavior on their girlfriends/wives. Then, there was a comparison of the same behavior among un-educated men both inside U.K and in other developing countries. I forgot the exact figures, as I saw the long time back. The conclusion of that show is still in my memory.

    The conclusion of that program was : a man beating his wife is a behavior that stems from his endeavor to seek dominance in the hierarchy. It is an attempt to control. Hence it has no relevance to the man's level of education. The most educated man is also as likely to do it, as the totally illiterate man, when it comes to wife beating.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 30, 2013
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