Does Cultural Differences Matter In Relationships?

shreyachatterje · Mar 6, 2009

Hello Everyone,
Few months back, I went to US to stay over my brother and Boudi’s place. There I fell for an Italian guy who happens to be my brother’s colleague. The guy really likes me a lot... But I am kind an apprehensive about the fact that we have different cultural background. Hence I am little jittery about the idea of settling down with him. Would the cultural differences matter in case of relationships?

I am so confused but at the same time I love him a lot. :confused2: I am so much scared that I could not tell anyone - even my brother and Boudi are unaware of this.

He calls me and mails Computer Typing me everyday. He says he is ready to marry me and would love to come down to India anytime to with his parents to talk to my parents... I really love him and he seems to be very honest!

IL is the first to know about my problem.
Please girls, help me find a solution… :help

I really need one right now…
Bye, Shreya

saradiawrites · Mar 13, 2009

Hey Shreya,
OK! Its tricky… cultural differences may not apparently matter in such relationships but there are a few things you need to keep in mind if you are thinking of committing yourself for your life.

First, remember – you’re are going to go to their place, so you’d need to adjust more than your hubby – food, clothing, language, religion (I don’t know if you’d be taking up his religion or not) and a whole lot of things you’d need to adjust! Can you do it? If YES! Then go ahead, if NO! then don’t encourage the relationship any further…

Don’t think that if you break this relationship now, you’d be repenting for your lifetime… it doesn’t happen that way. It’s better to weep a few nights now than repent for your entire life later.

Hope… This helps you!
Love You,
Saradia

papiyarose · Mar 19, 2009

Hi Shreya,
Saradia, your suggestion is quite on your face and a very practical one. The word definitely is ‘adjustment’, dear Shreya, you will have to ask yourself whether you can adjust with him or not. We all can provide you with suggestions and help as many as possible, but at the end, it will be your decision completely. I think you should also start telling about this to your elders. Whatever you do, don’t do in haste, whether you stay with him or not, it is a decision of a life time.
You should think about it more, I think…
All the best…
Keep smiling…
Papiya

sriparnaguha · Mar 19, 2009

Hello Shreya,
Cultural differences really don’t matter if you understand your partner in a better way and so does he. Yes, you will have to adjust to a lot of things, and if you think that you can adjust with him and understand him, then I would suggest you to go for it.

We are Bengalees but my sister is married to a Punjabi, and to be true, initially she had to face little problems, but everyone has to face it. She had to learn their language, food, understand their culture and most of all had to adjust with her in-laws.

Besides, understanding him, you will have to know his parents and friends as well. Papiya has said it right too, go and inform your parents about it. Don't hide from the fact :hide: - its a crucial decision of your life

Do tell us about your developments in this matter. :thumbsup
Love, Sriparna

shreyachatterje · Mar 20, 2009

Hello Saradia, Sriparna and Papiya,

Thanks for helping me out. Yes I too think that I must inform my elders about it. But I am little scared about how will they react to it. This is first time in our family that something like this has happened. You all don’t know how much your suggestions have given me relief; in fact your replies have boosted me as well. I will now soon have to break the ice. And about that adjusting factor, of course I am ready to adjust with him, no matter what.

The future is now somewhat becoming clear. Thanks to you all…
Keep posting more…

Love you,
Shreya