Do Kids Birthday Parties Create Comparison?

Hi @Vedhavalli,

I agree wth your noble thoughts, it is a great way to inculcate positive ideas in your kid. But a 4 year old may find it hard to understand.

Although charity is important, at the same time, I wouldn’t want to miss out on giving my kids fun memories of their birthdays, esp when they are so young. Am sure when they get older, things may change and they may not want such grand parties anymore, and at that point I can never go back to give my kid what they wanted when they were little.
Am also against buying unnecessary material things and spoiling kids with whatever they want, but I feel that this is one thing I would be willing to splurge on, if needed may cut back on some of my personal expenses to make it happen. Our kids abroad are growing up in a completely different environment, and such parties may help them blend in more and not stand out.
Also not every themed party needs to be expensive or extravagant.. we can find something to suit every budget.. a splurge on the bday, maybe even every alternate year may be a good idea.

 

@Vedhavalli

I read your note carefully when I responded and I was wondering too why people were writing about judging others when you have specifically mentioned that you are not judging anyone. If celebrating the birthday of a child elaborately in a five star hotel is a prerogative of the parents, so is celebrating simply at home teaching austerity to the children.

 

“ I don't believe in unwanted showoff parties, rather I'm a simple person, who spend money for a orphan child's education , give donation on birthdays , anniversaries... when in India will provide lunch for a orphanage” .

This caught my eye ! Judge others and be preparared to be judged as well.
I love organizing showoff parties for my kids. As for charity I will not talk about it. Sorry if my personal opinion sounded rude.

 

@Vedhavalli , yes, kids birthday parties do form a topic of conversation. Having said this, there are no right answers. It can really go according to what one believes in.
For me, I take great pleasure in party planning, down to the last banner, down to the last party favor, down to that complicated flavor of the cake. To me, its not a waste of money. It makes my kids very happy to have all the friends over. I am known to have spent $$$$ on parties. That is what makes us (me and hubby) happy. I obviously cannot afford everything my daughters heart is after and I do explain her the importance of money. I just dont (personally) believe that the money meant for my daughters party should be given away. Both hubby and I work really really hard and its the simple pleasure I get when I see her really happy. I wouldnt trade this for anything else. I dont see money going into parties as a waste.

As a matter of fact, I take pride in getting things done locally. For example, we celebrated my son's 3rd birthday literally yesterday. The favor bags consisted of homemade soaps (by a local small business mom), cake by a homemaker, banners by another mom, indoor play stadium was a local small scale business owner, pizza and sandwiches were from a local bakery. The way i look at it, I have given business to these local people in my town. I have given livelihood. I did not waste. thats my take.
Note that my parties are planned keeping in mind the kids fun

Having said that, if giving the same $$$$ to orphanage makes you happy, by all means you should do that. You can always explain to the child that you can do something else that makes her happy and it need not necessarily involve money.