Do I Owe Any Responsibilities To Parents Who Treated Me Most Shabbily,meanly Against My Bro & Sil

@maddysweet

 

Their son is not ready to shift to Bangalore. At Bangalore there are many opportunities for skills he has. He can easily find new job and lead a life , both of them can get the best job. But they are bloody homesick people with attitude of being always at home in the income of my dad. Though they know that my dad's pension is too meagre, and mom has become very weak. My mom has become weak in just 2.5 years of marriage a lot. Even my dad 's hands trembles. But still they both, their SON cannot live apart and do their own set of things. Cooking and serving them, washing their clothes, taking care of their kid, managing to give money for all their purchases,everything is done by my parents. I can take care of myself, very very well. But with the various services they are fancifully giving their SON and DIL , they are prone to get older and face all the issues like getting some old age diseases etc very soon due to constant work. My mom requires so much of efforts to manage my dad alone, like cooking and serving exactly as per his needs etc. My dad and mom alone find difficult to live on their own, on the top of that this fellow that is their SON and DIL order my mom all delicious dishes,recipes they like, like command over my mom, which my mom never prepares when she is alone with my dad and they relish it.
So this way both mom and dad are being very severely exploited, that I am strongly feeling if they are entitled timeline another 10 years on Earth, but due to severe work levels, they are forced to live only for 5 years. In this way the things I moving in my home, dead against my opinions, it's children's duty today understand that parents have given education,raised us, till particular age, but once married they have to lead their life independently without depending on parents services which makes them aged up very soon and become vulnerable to all diseases and disorders. This fellow(bro ,) when he knows that he cannot handle his married life alone by himself along with wife, instead spread all his duties on parents, why should he get married without stabilising in career. Also past 2 months he is resigned from job, but he does not want to go to Bangalore and try for openings, which means he is dead homesick guy who wants to get services from my parents constantly. He never makes his resumes and applies for new openings. He always wants to cling at my parents home. He has told many times to my mom that "my parents have sent him.out of home in the name of working holding a job becoming a responsible person" . He is not ready to accept basic fact that marriage requires lot of foundation to be having commanding some job like bring some manager or technical leader, so that chances of loosing his job are very very meagre. He got married hastily, and he never manages to either do job or take care of his wife and kid. I feel that he has got married and the cost of his marriage is entirely being paid by my parents. My parents have been asking him to try for new openings at new firms. But he idly sits at home just wasting time, browsing something, watching TV etc. From past 2 months he is at home, and he got one interview call offer from some company. That job offer call also only when my parents forced him lot he went and attended, but could not clear that interview. So on this way he is least inclined to try for jobs, thinking he is married person ,responsible person and he has to work to support his wife and family but he wants to enjoy a FREE RIDE on my dad's meagre income and pension. They are at age where their hands shake, and voices tremble, hands and face become so weak, but still they think that it's their duty to serve their SON and DIL even at the cost of facing their own serious health issues. My mom is already suffering from severe lumbar spondilitis. She complains of constant backaches and shoulder aches. The skin of her palms has peeled off so much that it looks as it someone has done carpentry work on her hands which can be owed to constant cooking. But still they keep all their issues to themselves. They never express to others. In fact my mom was not very happy, when she heard my brother loosing his job, and that he is returning to native. She was thinking that already the heavy duty of serving their DIL, kid, her husband was heavy like anything for her, when she heard the news of my brother returning, back to native, she was not happy that again 1 more member will be added on her list to give FREE RIDE. I clearly see that only with apprehensions and fear that in old age and for cremation their son should support, also their DIL should not complain to others about their family even if my mom dad tells her single advice just like their child to her,still she complains that to her father, and her relatives, and blackmails my parents to forcibly make them serve her. Else she stands on edge or brim to make all matters of my parents behaviour how they treat her to disclose to her parents and relatives, so that my mom dad will be under constant fear of her, "of our Dil makes some complaint about us to outsiders then it's issue of our family prestige ", only fearing, getting frightened about that my parents, care her lot. She is so dead lazy that always she wants to sit and eat, what my mom cooked and both of them waste the rest of time in browsing, playing games, watching serials etc , but never budget to find jobs apply ,participate in interviews etc. I feel if they contest in competition of Guinness book of world record for bring laziest couple on earth, I am damn sure they will be 1st people to win it. I never feel they are married, but instead I feel my parents have got remarried to relive the life when any couple gets freshly married, since I find TOP to BOTTOM services done by my parents.
Married people don't strain and stress their AGED up and sick prone parents to obtain maximum services by blackmailing their parents that if you people don't look after my wife good then I will go out of this home or I will.never come back etc. He threatens them many times that he will leave this home, to make my parents get constantly subjugated but I know he can never leave this home as he is averse to doing job. So without job or working how will he be able to survive atleast on his own??. He just blackmails my parents if someone tells him or his wife single advice also like "become responsible ,try to get job etc", then he will threaten my parents that he will leave this home permanently, but I know he will 100% never leave this home. So I can sumarise each member of family this way.

Dad- never scold or advices my Dil a single thing thinking even telling some small advice to improve on being more responsible, matured of lend her mi hand in my mom's hand will always make her to complain to my bro or her parents, so when matters about this family go outside then my dad fears, he cannot face it,so blindly adjusts with them (son and DIL)thinking that they are most stubborn and arrogant people who can never be corrected in life despite knowing that my mom is getting weaker by cooking all alone ,cleaning etc. He advices his son to find new job so that on getting job, he and his wife start to go back to their work city where they can lead good life, independently, but his son is dead homesick hears advice from one ear and leaves it from another ear, never takes it seriously and finds a job. If he(bro) was serious Abt job long back he would have shifted to Bangalore and got settled with his wife there.

Mom - she never advices single thing about her dIL to her son or dad thinking Dil is very advanced and commanding,dominating girl who can spoil the family prestige about out family, even if she asks her to do some small things like cutting vegetables , serving food to everyone in family which is very very miniscule as opposed to mountainous things what my mom does by taking entire home respinsibilities on herself.
She wants her son to find a new job and settle but keeps quiet that he may misunderstanding it, she wants the overall wellbeing,welfare of her son to be matured,independent, responsible person, but he never understands even if she tells him, and moreover she never repeats again and again, advicing him, since my mom knows he is sensitive to her feelings he would have cared her thinking why should I become burden for my mom and he would have far back in history got settled in Bangalore where there are plenty plenty of jobs. Even if he works in Bangalore , he can visit my native for every 2 months stay for over 2 weeks with my parents along with wife and then again work. And moreover he never knows that in SOFTWARE, problem are allowed to work only till 45 yrs maximum. So another 8 to 10 years as much as he can if he works, he and his wife can earn enough money, and come and settle in my parents home only again. Living with parents will eventually be always there for him as he is son of the home. But simple facts like, earning as much as he can in his young age, and once opportunities get bleak to get job, he can settle in parents home,at our native.

Bro - never serious about anything in life or career. Always he is like he wants to depend and spend his entire life on my dad 's meagre pension of RS.15000 that my dad gets which will be hardly sufficient to stay with his wife(my mom). And he wants to sit and enjoy watching TV, eating all delicious meals, breakfast, lunch,dinner what my mom cooks (that too she makes very very special items everyday that not even ant 5star restaurant can equal in it's standards that she prepares). She carries her son even at this age when he is married like (how mom carries her son in tied pallu saree). But no matter how we worse the condition of my mom is , whether she suffers from any aches or bodily pains it's very very strict for her that she should cook, serve,clean regardless of whatever complains she has. On the top of my mom cooking,cleaning despite having her own boldily issues, he never eats naming items she prepares, that it's not good or he says it's not good taste so that she takes trouble of preparing some other things again for him no matter however painful it's fro her to do from scratch. On other hand if his wife would have cooked something at his work city, even if she sppoils entire thing, he eats it calmly saying it's very very good.

SIL - she always wants to be on top of world, browsing all expensive things, watching soap operas, chatting with her friends, playing games, she has abundant time for all the activities she wants to do which she likes bad enjoys, but does not have a single second, to help my mom in anything. Her only way of life, is to watch TV, play games, shop online, raise false complains ,spread rumours about my family that it's not caring her,loving her even if I am feeling that my parents have left NO STONE UNTURNED in see if her no less than GODDESS of the home. She also wants a very customised food in Every item mom prepares, like my .km removes separate section in each item she cooks as "less spicy" part and reserves it for her dIL. But still despite this her dil makes faces naming it that food is not good sometimes even if my dad and bro are OK and happy with it.

So my mom's cooking to her will be like walking on eggshells for everyone to match taste, and senses of everyone.

So when I have suggested my parents to ask and advice him mildly to move to Bangalore and find a job and settle with his wife instead of depending on them from A-Z services, but still they want to keep their sons ND sil at home, which is deteriorating their health days by day, making them very weak,fragile that it no later they will soon have all old age disorders creeping into their lives, before they change or make some decision about not to take looking after their sons ND sil anymore.

So do you people think that despite trying to advice my opinions on he each member of family should live by being mature, responsible, and sensible and sensitive person,in form of actions or words, they never heard my opinions, they least value my opinions and suggestions going in their own way of life.

But despite that they are not agreeing to my suggestions about lessening their burdens, duties by among their son and DIL , trying to politely and humbly advice them to make a separate living, yet visit my parents occasionally once in 2 months etc, still They want to keep their son and DIL who are very demanding, very commanding with looking after my parents no less or even worser than their slaves, I should still help them and take complete care about them in old age, also here I am completely discounting and forgetting and forgiving them about the bad treatment,partiality they did to me during my childhood and now also.
So they never cared me on equal stand or share as their son either in my childhood or now also in equal share and stand like their son and dil by being always partial, creating rumours, locking kitchen so that special things is entitled only for their son and dil, crating false complaints, rumours about things which I have not even done to m dad etc. Despite they being heavily abusive with me and being like slaves to their son and dil , do you think that still I should help them in their old age ???

And moreover, "when it's their son and dil who took services and made them weak, fragile, age fast, and become prone to disorders etc by taking services from their aged parents, ", don't you think that it's their son's sole responsibility to take care of his parents since he enjoyed services from them , had he not enjoyed their services they would not have aged faster, becoming prone to all disorders ??

So is it justice for me, that I should stay far away from my parents making my own career, cooking for myself, or bringing meals from far away places, washing my own clothes, cleaning home on my own, so staying my life all alone , and if I am finding my own guy get married on my own expenses(provided I find someone who is really good person on whom I have strong gut feelings that I can be happy with him ), so when I am devoid of services from them, and not getting any share of services my bro enjoys on expenses and services from my parents, still do you think I should help them.